March 2013 Moms

Babysitting gone wrong...

So, I am the overprotective, organized, schedule, type A, take on all the responsibility type of person.

Normally, my mom watches DD if hubby n I have to do something, but my mom is horribly sick and I didnt want DD around her.

So, I let my guard down and decided to let my sister in law come babysit LO for the first time! She is normally great with her, but she is a but inexperienced with kids and how to handle upsets, but I let go and left for just 2 hours.

When I got home at 9pm, LO had been passed out *there goes bedtime* for 20 minutes, was hyperventilating *because she was screaming so much from being upset*, had soaked through her clothes *her diaper had not been changed*, and was all flushed and hot!

I woke her, changed her diaper, comfort nursed her, put her PJ's on, and am trying so hard to get my now untired child asleep!

She told me she was screaming, so she tried rocking her in the rocking chair, putting her in different positions, etc, but those things don't work on an 8 month old who is upset! At least not mine.

I obviously didn't show I was upset, and thanked her tons, because she did do her best.

With that being said, I now see why I am that protective, I do all, mother.
My husband, myself, and my mom are the only ones I trust to do what she likes!

I feel irritated that I wasn't called while she was screaming, so I could home, or at least tell her how to calm her.

I can tell she was frazzled, because there were clothes everywhere! Backtrack, she changed her, because water spilled on her! Lol She was searching through the wrong size clothes, then finally found something DD could wear! Her toys looked like they went through a tornado, and things are everywhere!

I guess I'm sharing to give myself therapy, and give others a laugh. I'm irritated, but find the humor.

Point blank, lesson learned!
Me: 30 | DH:34
Married: 08/04/12
DD: 6 years | Born: 03/28/13
DS: 1 Year I Born 10/15/17

Re: Babysitting gone wrong...

  • Poor Mama and baby!
  • spring_timespring_time member
    edited November 2013
    You are going to burn yourself out with that mindset.  From one type A personality to another, you have to let go.  Nobody will do things the way you will.  

    My sister, who is experienced with babies, just babysat my daughter a few weeks ago. DD screamed for two hours.  She was 7 months.

    When he was 10 months, my DS stayed overnight with my in-laws.  They drove him back to our house at 2am because he wouldn't stop crying.  Experience has nothing to do with it.

    I have had people put my kids to bed in some of the most ridiculous outfits.  Bedtime has frequently been shot to hell.  They have left all the lights on because I said DS needed a nightlight.  My house has been torn apart.  I learned to lay out clothes, be explicit with my instructions, and just let the house go because it is what worked for them.  In the end, I needed the time away, and everybody survived.

    I also wouldn't give up on allowing other people to watch your DD.  She will get over it, and they will find ways that work for them to soothe her.  My DH does not soothe our children the same why I do, but it takes trial and error.  Your DD needs to learn to be with other people.

    Maybe consider getting your SIL a little gift card, or even sending a brief thank you note. She probably feels awful and embarrassed she couldn't soothe your daughter.  As I am sure you know, it is the most awful, helpless feeling when you can't soothe a baby.  I guarantee, her night was worse than yours!

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  • Yep this was us last weekend. Went to the movies cane home at 11pm to a baby who had been awake since 9pm (bed time is 7). I left detailed instructions and they weren't followed :/ I told her she wouldn't need to eat the next morning I found 6oz of Breastmilk in her bottle under a chair. Wasted :(
  • I agree with One of the past posters. You probably need to ease up a little. Especially when she's not used to her, things won't be as normal. I'm sure there will be plenty of times that she won't go to sleep at the exact time with even with your mom. Sorry it was a rough two hours. Hope it didn't throw you off too bad!
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  • I am not trying to be rude here but if you knew she was a bit inexperienced why didn't you ask her to come early and go over everything?  I think next time just preparing the babysitter and letting her know where the right size clothes are or tricks to getting your LO to sleep might be better. 
  • smfdjo said:

    I am not trying to be rude here but if you knew she was a bit inexperienced why didn't you ask her to come early and go over everything?  I think next time just preparing the babysitter and letting her know where the right size clothes are or tricks to getting your LO to sleep might be better. 

    She did come early and I explained, but nothing I said was done. Lol

    As far as soothing goes, every baby is different. I could explain what she likes, but actually doing it are so different!

    I didn't explain how to get her to sleep, because she wasn't suppose to be sleeping! I came back by bed time, but LO was so upset she got tired n put herself to sleep.

    Granted, she has no kids, so she didn't know. When I got home and tried putting LO to bed, my sister in law walked up stairs and started playing peek a boo with her! AFTER I even said, ok I'll be right back down, I want to try getting her to bed without waking her too much, or she won't go back to sleep.

    It was horrifying lol

    I was irritated, but thankful. It wasn't anyone's fault. Just a learning experience for both.
    Me: 30 | DH:34
    Married: 08/04/12
    DD: 6 years | Born: 03/28/13
    DS: 1 Year I Born 10/15/17

  • I am remembering you now.  You are the one who did not want family members kissing your daughter at a baby shower.  It sounds like your real issue is with your in-laws.  They cannot do anything right in your eyes, and you will look for any excuse to not leave your child with them.  I feel sorry for them.  It sounds like they love your child very much and are constantly met with reproach.

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  • I am remembering you now.  You are the one who did not want family members kissing your daughter at a baby shower.  It sounds like your real issue is with your in-laws.  They cannot do anything right in your eyes, and you will look for any excuse to not leave your child with them.  I feel sorry for them.  It sounds like they love your child very much and are constantly met with reproach.

    Wrong. It was a bridal shower, and it was strangers who I was not okay with taking my baby away and kissing her. Then, when I asked for her back, the lady told me no. My DH was upset too.

    I love my in laws. They are great with her.

    I asked my sister in law, BECAUSE she is so great with her. She just had a mishap that made me feel bad for LO n after the initial irritation, I laughed n shared...
    They do love her a lot, but also do a lot of things I don't like.

    My DH n I are on the same page. For example, tease her with food, etc.

    They have gotten better, but this is also stuff they did to my DH when he was little and he hated it.

    The type of people that when you tell them something, they don't listen, and only believe what they think is true.

    I love them, and how much they love LO. We are both working at it.

    Me: 30 | DH:34
    Married: 08/04/12
    DD: 6 years | Born: 03/28/13
    DS: 1 Year I Born 10/15/17

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