Found this on the "Parenting" board. I know...i'm a creeper but seriously...HUH?!

Re: Found this on the "Parenting" board. I know...i'm a creeper but seriously...HUH?!

• kseccomb17 member

  November 2013

  Ouch. That doesn't even sound appealing- see what I did there? Seriously though.

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• AcaAwkward member

  November 2013

  Guess she didn't have a cucumber handy?

  
  

  DD 2/21/2012 & DS 4/1/2014

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• ksulli member

  November 2013

  I can't even click on that, but it sounds unsanitary.

  *Married 10.10.08*

   

  TTC #1 9.09 - BFP#1:2.18.10= missed m/c, D&C 4.16

  BFP#2:10.22.10=Avelin born 7.2.11

  TTC#2: 2.13 - BFP#3: 7.25.13=Kelsey born 3.31.14

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• kseccomb17 member

  November 2013

  ksulli said:

  I can't even click on that, but it sounds unsanitary.

  She said she washed it first...  8-|

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• myschlove member

  November 2013

  she should have used protection...

  
  

  

  
  

  
  

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• Rrrrrachel member

  November 2013 edited November 2013

  Seriously this has got to be mud. Does this lady not realize there's this thing called the internet? And she can have the appropriate tool for that shipped to her house in two days or less in a plain unmarked box?

  Mama to a little girl born July 2011 and a little boy born April 2014!

  Report11 Reply
• EnFuego12 member

  November 2013

  Gross!!!  People are crazy!

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• mrscrcalli member

  November 2013

  My baby is the size of a banana today

  September Siggy Challenge: What I Sing in the Shower: Little Mermaid "Part Of That World"

  
  

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• BiggerinRealLife member

  November 2013

  @MrscrCalli ::dead::

    

    

    

  Fell in Love: January 2003 

  Married: May 2006
  Baby Girl Born: April 2014
  If you ask me what I came to do in this world, I, an artist, I will answer you: 

  I am here to live out loud!

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• mrscrcalli member

  November 2013

  jellysparkles said:

  
  

  mrscrcalli said:

  
  

  My baby is the size of a banana today

  
  

  Suuuree... "baby"... we all know it's from the banana accident you didn't have checked out months ago
  
  I prefer a more straight approach like a cucumber I don't like wen they curve..
  Insert clueless gif here (damn mobile!)

  September Siggy Challenge: What I Sing in the Shower: Little Mermaid "Part Of That World"

  
  

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• mrscrcalli member

  November 2013 edited November 2013

  Just as long as their you know what isn't crooked...

  image.jpg 34.3K

  September Siggy Challenge: What I Sing in the Shower: Little Mermaid "Part Of That World"

  
  

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• RedDawnsRevenge member

  November 2013

  So I totally believe this is real, not mud. In my last 5 years in the ER I have seen some f**ked up s**t in/on peoples asses, penises and vag's.

  Report14 Reply
• mrscrcalli member

  November 2013

  RedDawnsRevenge said:

  So I totally believe this is real, not mud. In my last 5 years in the ER I have seen some f**ked up s**t in/on peoples asses, penises and vag's.

  Go onnnnn... 8->

  September Siggy Challenge: What I Sing in the Shower: Little Mermaid "Part Of That World"

  
  

  Report17 Reply
• sloger member

  November 2013

   :-O

   

  i'm gonna need some examples.

  

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• Serenla member

  November 2013

  Someone get that woman a dildo.

  
  

  
  

  
  

           PAL Sep challenge George Takei

  Started dating in 5/9/05, Married 6/25/11

  Started TTC Feb 2013, BFP #1 3/4/13 EDD 11/10/13. MMC 4/9/13 D&C 4/22/13.

  BFP #2 7/17/13, EDD 3/29/14 ended in a CP on 7/22/13.

  BFP#3 8/19/13 EDD 5/3/14 Nerdling was born 4/29/14, welcome little one!

   All AL welcome.
  
  

  
  

    

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• Serenla member

  November 2013

  @RedDawnsRevenge said:

  So I totally believe this is real, not mud. In my last 5 years in the ER I have seen some f**ked up s**t in/on peoples asses, penises and vag's.

  You cannot leave us hanging!

  
  

  
  

  
  

           PAL Sep challenge George Takei

  Started dating in 5/9/05, Married 6/25/11

  Started TTC Feb 2013, BFP #1 3/4/13 EDD 11/10/13. MMC 4/9/13 D&C 4/22/13.

  BFP #2 7/17/13, EDD 3/29/14 ended in a CP on 7/22/13.

  BFP#3 8/19/13 EDD 5/3/14 Nerdling was born 4/29/14, welcome little one!

   All AL welcome.
  
  

  
  

    

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• Alana1977 member

  November 2013

  Lol. I have several friends who are ER nurses. I have heard stories of what some ppl do to amuse themselves

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• kseccomb17 member

  November 2013

  My mom worked in the er for years and came home once hysterical because she had to remove cherries from a man's butt.

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• RedDawnsRevenge member

  November 2013

  3 ducted taped together kielbasa
  A toilet wand (bristles first)
  A butt plug bigger than my fist
  A metal rod with a pool noodle to cover it...
  
  Want more? Oh and all of these were in butts...male butts

  Report32 Reply
• mrscrcalli member

  November 2013

  RedDawnsRevenge said:

  3 ducted taped together kielbasa
  A toilet wand (bristles first)
  A butt plug bigger than my fist
  A metal rod with a pool noodle to cover it...
  
  Want more? Oh and all of these were in butts...male butts

  The kielbasa has me DEAD!

  September Siggy Challenge: What I Sing in the Shower: Little Mermaid "Part Of That World"

  
  

  Report4 Reply
• moonsparkles member

  November 2013

  You guys are too funny.

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• kwolslager member

  November 2013

  A good friend of mine works as an ER nurse and one time had a patient come in with a melted candy bar up there! She couldn't get it out in her own and needed help. Some people are such idiots! If you're going to put it up there at least leave the wrapper on!

   

  DD1- 2009, M/C- 2011, M/C- 2012, DD2- 2012, DD3- 2014

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• Serenla member

  November 2013

  mrscrcalli said:

  RedDawnsRevenge said:

  3 ducted taped together kielbasa
  A toilet wand (bristles first)
  A butt plug bigger than my fist
  A metal rod with a pool noodle to cover it...
  
  Want more? Oh and all of these were in butts...male butts

  The kielbasa has me DEAD!

  Was the kielbasa man polish by chance?

  
  

  
  

  
  

           PAL Sep challenge George Takei

  Started dating in 5/9/05, Married 6/25/11

  Started TTC Feb 2013, BFP #1 3/4/13 EDD 11/10/13. MMC 4/9/13 D&C 4/22/13.

  BFP #2 7/17/13, EDD 3/29/14 ended in a CP on 7/22/13.

  BFP#3 8/19/13 EDD 5/3/14 Nerdling was born 4/29/14, welcome little one!

   All AL welcome.
  
  

  
  

    

  Report5 Reply
• Eija3014 member

  November 2013

  Serenla said:

  mrscrcalli said:

  RedDawnsRevenge said:

  3 ducted taped together kielbasa
  A toilet wand (bristles first)
  A butt plug bigger than my fist
  A metal rod with a pool noodle to cover it...
  
  Want more? Oh and all of these were in butts...male butts

  The kielbasa has me DEAD!

  Was the kielbasa man polish by chance?

  I almost peed my pants )

  Report1 Reply
• RedDawnsRevenge member

  November 2013

  Kielbasa man claimed to have slipped and landed on them, which happened to be ducted taped together, and he just happened to be naked...I still can't figure it out.
  
  Then there have been all manor of girths/lengths of dildos/vibrators. Some have been on.
  
  A woman with "vaginal slugs". She came in with several (many) labeled specimen containers with things she claimed had come from different places/ orifices of her body. I never did she her vag, or weither the slugs really were from down there. The EDMD discharged her from intact, telling her it wasn't an emergency.
  
  Eggs in vag/rectum, they should have hard boiled them first.
  
  Wine/beer bottle in rectum. Some times you can inflate a foley ballon and pull them out, if you can't then they have to have surgery.
  
  Had a pt come in as a jail clearance, after being strip search at the prison they sent her right back. They said she had a "foreign body" in her clit. In the ER after further inspection a CT was done to figure out what the object was. No foreign body was found. The woman had tied up her clit and it had become hard and necrotic...
  
  The endoscopy lab at my last hospital had a "black box" it was awesome...

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• Rrrrrachel member

  November 2013

  Wth on the clit thing. I mean really. W. T. H.

  Mama to a little girl born July 2011 and a little boy born April 2014!

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• kseccomb17 member

  November 2013

  Vaginal slugs? What the fucking fuck

  Report3 Reply
• patunia7321 member

  November 2013

  Oh. My. God. Slipped and landed on 3 ducked taped kielbasa, naked.... I can't even. )

  
  

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• RedDawnsRevenge member

  November 2013

  All I can say is I have the best poker face ever. Though there have been a few times when PTs have told me things and I couldn't help myself.

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• sloger member

  November 2013

  Is that...buzz light year??? To infinity and and beyond!!!

  

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• Bees Everywhere member

  November 2013

  BUZZ FUCKING LIGHTYEAR. heh, literally. 

  
  

  It's amazing how many people slip and fall onto things and the things go up their ass. We should all be really careful because it's apparently pretty common, haah. 

    

  
  
  

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• mrscrcalli member

  November 2013

  RedDawnsRevenge said:

  Kielbasa man claimed to have slipped and landed on them, which happened to be ducted taped together, and he just happened to be naked...I still can't figure .

  DEAD!!!! I can't breathe, I'm snorting DH is dead!
  We are done dancing naked while cooking kielbasa so we don't ever have to face that kind of an accident .

  September Siggy Challenge: What I Sing in the Shower: Little Mermaid "Part Of That World"

  
  

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• RedDawnsRevenge member

  November 2013

  embear22 said:

  
  

  RedDawnsRevenge said:

  
  

  3 ducted taped together kielbasa
  A toilet wand (bristles first)
  A butt plug bigger than my fist
  A metal rod with a pool noodle to cover it...
  
  Want more? Oh and all of these were in butts...male butts

  
  

  
  
  
  But....but, how? How is that even possible? A whole pool noodle? Width wise is huge!
  
  He told us that he'd had this one night stand and woke up that way... The metal rod was huge! I mean like over a foot in length. And I guess the noodle was to make it soft? The best part was the doctor got it out really easily. An hour after the pt left the pt came back for his noodle rod!!! I don't buy the PTs story at all! The width is huge! I'd have to work that area out for god knows how long before that would fit, I don't care how drunk you are.

  Report2 Reply
• BiggerinRealLife member

  November 2013

  Erggggiiisshhhh!
  
  ^^That's a noise of extreme discomfort. This thread has made me squirm in the worst way. I'm quitting the internet for tonight. Have fun ladies!

    

    

    

  Fell in Love: January 2003 

  Married: May 2006
  Baby Girl Born: April 2014
  If you ask me what I came to do in this world, I, an artist, I will answer you: 

  I am here to live out loud!

  Report3 Reply
• jennypenny1014 member

  November 2013

  WINNING!!!   =D>

  
  

  
  

  )

  
  

  Holy hell.... @-)

  
    

   

  Report1 Reply
• Bluebird2318 member

  November 2013 edited November 2013

  RedDawnsRevenge said:

  embear22 said:

  
  

  RedDawnsRevenge said:

  
  

  3 ducted taped together kielbasa
  A toilet wand (bristles first)
  A butt plug bigger than my fist
  A metal rod with a pool noodle to cover it...
  
  Want more? Oh and all of these were in butts...male butts

  
  

  
  
  
  But....but, how? How is that even possible? A whole pool noodle? Width wise is huge!

  He told us that he'd had this one night stand and woke up that way... The metal rod was huge! I mean like over a foot in length. And I guess the noodle was to make it soft? The best part was the doctor got it out really easily. An hour after the pt left the pt came back for his noodle rod!!! I don't buy the PTs story at all! The width is huge! I'd have to work that area out for god knows how long before that would fit, I don't care how drunk you are.
  
  ----------------------
  
  I am just lying here in bed horrified at the thought of what his butt must have looked like immediately post-noodle... :-&

  March 2017 September Siggy Challenge: Favorite Fall Things
  
  
  
  

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• NYJodway member

  November 2013

  I can't even tell what in this thread made me laugh the hardest.  It's all pretty amazing.
  

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• RedDawnsRevenge member

  November 2013

  Yeah, I'm not allowed to talk about my job unless the husbands trying to win a gross out contest with his friends.

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• emanresu14 member

  November 2013 edited November 2013

  This might be better than the ranch or the poll deciding on last names. Pool noodle story horrifies me. My mom's ex H told me a stories of how men would use hamsters to stimulate themselves.. I guess he worked in the medical field (hoping this is how he knew about this) and they used to go to the ER for removal/treatment. Poor animals! I don't understand how things are taken to such extreme levels!
  Edited for typo

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• RedDawnsRevenge member

  November 2013

  emanresu14 said:

  This might be better than the ranch or the poll deciding on last names. Pool noodle story horrifies me. My mom's ex H told me a stories of how men would use hamsters to stimulate themselves.. I guess he worked in the medical field (hoping this is how he knew about this) and they used to go to the ER for removal/treatment. Poor animals! I don't understand how things are taken to such extreme levels!
  Edited for typo

  I have never seen this, other than on South Park. I'm not sure what I would do as the nurse... I know we are "to do no harm" but I'd be praying that hamster caused that person irreparable harm, to do that to a poor animal!

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