Hi
I need a little advice and thought this board could be a great resource since many people have young children or might have experience with this.
My husband and I are coaching a youth basketball league this year, ages 7-8. We just had our first practice yesterday and everything was fine except one 7 year old boy has very obvious special needs. He was extremely disrespectful to both of us and disrupting the whole practice. I felt like we spent half of our time trying to keep him under control. At one point he would not give me back a basketball that he was not supposed to have... finally he threw it at me violently and said "Take that Barbie Doll!" This is just one example. He also would just run around aimlessly and never listen to the instructions we were giving.
I am pretty sure he is in foster care. He is a different race than his guardian and has a different last name. His guardian dropped him off and left, then picked him up without saying a word. He seemed completely aware of the child's difficulty but not very approachable. He doesn't strike me as the type that is easy to talk to about things like this, he just seemed annoyed with the little boy himself. I suppose if I were the parent I would be really upfront about something so obvious. Basketball is not a good choice for a child with attention issues and it is also not a form of cheap child care. I am familiar with the complex challenges children in foster care face as my husband and I have been to courses when considering fostering ourselves. So it's not his behavior that has me worried, but rather how I can best accommodate him to have a successful season.
I need some tips on how to handle this situation. As of now, our plan to to come up with some special roles for him to do while waiting his turn (catching rebounds, cheering for teammates, etc.), and wait until after our first game to see if things need to be addressed further. I am trying to come up with some creative solutions to redirect his extra energy and keep him engaged while sitting on the bench as well. After the first game, if things haven't improved, I would approach the guardians/parents to ask for advice on how we can better coach their child. We have two more practices until our first game in early December. I understand it is not the child's fault, I just want to make sure all of the other 10 children do not get less out of this season because their teammate needs more attention. I also want this to be a great experience for this otherwise delightful little boy!
Any advice or feedback would be VERY appreciated! Thanks in advance!!
Re: Coaching a child with special needs
Really, crafty, you are assuming way too much. The first step to helping is not assuming. Some kids go crazy when routine is broken. Give it a few more practices before you continue to assume. It could be his nanny, brother, cousin, etc bringing him to practice.
Hell, maybe the kid will go back to his real family. Then you both win! :please note the dripping sarcasm:
I agree with MW, it sounds like you're making a lot of assumptions. I think all of the children, including him, would benefit from his full participation as much as possible, as it is very important for children to learn how to treat everyone, despite differences.
TheCraftyKoala said:
BFP 6/15/14 EDD: 2/24/15
I'm so glad you can diagnose ADHD in a school age child by seeing them one time. You should go work for my kids neurologists office--I'm sure they'd appreciate your expertise.
I would suggest researching this problem and talking with others who've worked with kids with similar problems. I have worked exclusively with children of all abilities for the last 10 years and believe that anyone who works with kids everyday can quickly determine the ones that are going to struggle or have attention or hyperactivity issues. Trust your instincts! The things that have worked best for me all involve not going it alone. Ask for help. Even ask for help from the child. Be honest and let them know what your concerns are and see if y'all can make a plan. Good luck!
She said this kid doesn't belong playing basketball because kids with ADHD do better in individual sports when she doesn't even know if the child actually has ADHD. People placing labels on kids based on one encounter really, really rubs me the wrong way.
Eh, she said basketball is not fitting for a kid like him then linked an article from an ADHD article supporting what she said. She might have not flat out said ADHD but she most certainly inferred it between that link, the special needs and attention issues comments.