It's been two months since I learned of my missed miscarriage.
This weekend a friend from high school got married. She had her first child 2 years ago.
I was looking through her pictures and posts about the wedding, which struck me with jealousy anyway (I've recently had to postpone my own wedding plans for financial reasons, not that it's URGENT that we get married right now), then happened to get stuck in the dangerous loop of clicking through all her photos.
I was doing okay with the pictures of her and her daughter but then I got to one of her with her little 6 month bump. Then I clicked further, and found the ultrasound. You know the one, where the face is right up close and it's beautiful and breathe taking and I never got to have the for myself and I'm just furious and jealous and it makes me feel sick.
Overall, I'm doing really okay with coping with my grief. I'm able to live my day to day life without many disturbances.
Does anyone else just have these moments where something sends you off the edge. Like, lump in your throat, want to yell and scream and cry and damn everything because your life isn't working and other people seem to have it so peachy?