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H doesn't agree anymore

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Re: H doesn't agree anymore

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  • lilmama412lilmama412 member
    edited September 2013
    Andrewsgal said:

    @lilmama412 you are ridiculous.the thought that grown men can't keep themselves clean is sad. I don't know what kid of child you married but DH is pretty damn good at bathing as all grown men should be. Oh and I live in Texas the capital of hunting, fishing and dirt biking. That is no excuse. I really don't care if people choose to circ or not but to use the excuse that men can't be expected to know how to clean themselves is sad. I would never have married a man that could not figure out how to shower I a sorry you did.

    I never said men can't keep themselves clean! I said they aren't KNOWN for their cleanliness. I never said ALL men are disgusting and never shower or wash their penis.

    I also said in my culture men like to do dirty activities like hunt, fish and spend time in the woods, work on cars and be outside 24/7. Hygiene isn't there number one priority although they are perfectly capable of keeping themselves clean. DH loves to be dirty but showers regularly, and is a clean person. He is also circumcised do getting an infection is a nonissue. He is a real manly man. Not a girly prissy one who has to shower 2x a day, get manicures and never done hard labor in his life.

    Please show me where I said all men are disgusting pigs who can't wash?!? @Andrewsgal
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  • lilmama412lilmama412 member
    edited September 2013
    @Andrewsgal my husband was a Marine who served 2 tours in Iraq where he saw his best friends get killed. He got blown up by a road side bomb and is now disabled. Upon returning home he has been diagnosed with severe PTSD. He has seen many of his combat buddies who did not die in war come back and commit suicide or drink themselves to death. He is now in extensive therapy so he doesn't do the same. He wasn't able to shower for weeks at a time while he was in the desert!!

    Do you have anything else you want to say about my husband?? What has your husband ever done, besides take a shower regularly ?? I'm sorry you didn't marry a real man, don't take that out in me.
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  • lilmama412lilmama412 member
    edited September 2013
    Disagreements are one thing, but personal attacks have no place here. Especially when you want to attack someone's husband and you have no idea the hell that they've been through.
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  • AndrewsgalAndrewsgal member
    edited September 2013
    Wow you are off your rocker. You are the one that said that your husband couldn't keep,clean not me. Please tell me where I insulted your husband and how is has anything to do with him being a war vet, nice pulling that card though. And you are dead wrong that men are not known for their cleanliness. My husband is about as far from a metrosexual male as you can get and still manages to stay clean. I am sorry yours can't. While I appreciate your husbands service it has nothing to do with this argument and pulling out that card when you are wrong cheapens everything he did and fought for. So think about that next time before you play that card. And lol at I did not marry a real man. Pretty sure real men can hunt and shower. Therefore pretty sure I married a real man.
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  • AndrewsgalAndrewsgal member
    And maybe if you stopped spouting misinformation like men can't keep clean then you wouldn't feel attacked in the first place,
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  • Kristy774Kristy774 member
    @kbuckleyharp I definitely was aware and knew the procedure going in to getting my tonsils removed, my boys circumcision, my son having 2 hernias removed last year, my mom having 2 masses removed out of her throat and tonsil area this Tuesday, being informed and aware of what is taking place and watching it done is completely different in my opinion. I can barely handle my sons throwing let alone watching any medical procedure so to me, I personally think its a little odd to watch a video of any medical procedure. I wouldn't want to see my child get a root canal but I'd want to be informed of everything step by step, I still wouldn't want to go home and watch videos of it being done.
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  • lilmama412lilmama412 member
    Andrewsgal said:
    @lilmama412 you are ridiculous.the thought that grown men can't keep themselves clean is sad. I don't know what kid of child you married but DH is pretty damn good at bathing as all grown men should be. Oh and I live in Texas the capital of hunting, fishing and dirt biking. That is no excuse. I really don't care if people choose to circ or not but to use the excuse that men can't be expected to know how to clean themselves is sad. I would never have married a man that could not figure out how to shower I a sorry you did.
    @Andrewsgal This is where you insulated my husband. I asked you to show me where I said all men couldn't keep clean, or where I even said my husband wasn't clean. I never said any of that, and you couldn't even show me where I did. I'm not interested in getting into an aruguement with you, you are not worth my time. 

    My husband's service has everything to do with it. He didn't have the luxury of a shower for weeks while he was in Iraq, he was more worried about keeping himself a live. Do you think that after that, not showering EVERY damn day is a big deal to him? No, that's pretty low on his priority list when he has other demons that he faces everyday. 

    Again, please show me where I said men aren't capable of keeping themselves clean?? I said they aren't known for it...just like women aren't known for being truck drivers, mechanics, welders, etc. Are there plenty of women who are those things. Hell yeah there are, but they aren't known for it. Just like when I think of cleanliness a man isn't the first thing that pops into my head. Please quote for me where I said otherwise, before you go spreading misinformation. 
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  • katieharpicelandkatieharpiceland member
    @Kristy744 How is it weird that people have different ways of informing themselves? It just goes back to people thinking their way is the only way and people who do differently are weird. I am glad you researched it. I totally advocate knowing all you can. However, people do things differently and that is also ok. I was given a video OF a surgery I had for endometriosis. Am I weird for watching that because I was curious? 
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  • RrrrrachelRrrrrachel member
    Circumcised men are actually more prone to some types of infection. So I wouldn't say circumcision makes infection not an issue. Circumcising your son won't exempt him from basic hygiene.
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  • Kristy774Kristy774 member
    @kbuckleyharp I never said the word weird, I don't personally attack people on the Internet or in real life. That's part of the reason I use my real picture, I like who I am and I stand by the things I say and I've never called anyone weird. Again, I (as in me personally) wouldn't watch any medical video of any medical procedure, regardless of if I was for it or against it. I'm not in the medical field and I don't think its necessary to watch something being done to understand what's taking place. My opinion, I am not and and I was not putting anyone down or calling anyone names so please don't put me in the category.
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  • katieharpicelandkatieharpiceland member
    @Kristy744 I also have my real picture and my screen name hides nothing. I also apologize for confusing you with the poster that said it was "strange." You had just agreed with it, but not said it was strange personally.
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  • CandaceMarie321CandaceMarie321 member
    SeattleMomma said:

    My oldest son is, but my youngest is not. Let me tell you from personal experience. My youngest has had so many diaper rashes and even a bad infection once. It's really hard to keep clean. I clean my sons little birdy often but the smell, lent, etc still gets in there. Not too mention, I feel very uncomfortable having to pull his skin back and clean it.

    You are not suppose to pull the foreskin back, it is attached for the first few years of life. Pulling the foreskin back on a boy who is still in diapers can cause tears in the flesh leading to infections.

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  • Kristy774Kristy774 member
    @kbuckleyharp thanks, I really didn't mean to piss anyone off that's why I explained why I felt that way, I did say I find it a little odd but I do things I'm sure people think I do things that are a little odd that I think are perfectly normal. I have a weak stomach with medical kind of stuff.
    And I like all of your posts and everything you say so I really don't want to make you upset :) I was trying to explain where I was coming from by saying I thought it was a little odd. My brother got his wisdom teeth taken out with no medication and asked the doctor if he could use a mirror and watch, now that's weird lol
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  • CandaceMarie321CandaceMarie321 member
    OP if you are actually still following this: bless you.
    I would try to wait on any debates until you know if you are actually having a boy or not, but US can be wrong, so knowing what you are going to do is good.
    If you can't agree, I'd sit down with your husband and talk about who is going to be dealing with all the other issues attached to the penis. Who is going to teach your son about hygiene? Who is going to be dealing with issues related to sex? Even though this is a joint effort, one parent will be doing the lion's share of this work. My husband was planned to be "in charge" of these things, and being the parent in possession of a penis, he got final say. I think that giving him the ultimate choice is what what tipped him in my direction, because it allowed him to really decide on his own instead of defending his own penis.
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  • AndrewsgalAndrewsgal member
    edited September 2013
    All men I know do a great job of keeping themselves clean. Your statement that men are not known for keeping themselves clean is just as ridiculous the second time as the first time you said it. You know before you randomly threw out the whole PTSD thing to gain sympathy and make me look bad. ALL the men I know are just as clean as women and shockingly they are all what I consider manly men.
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  • katieharpicelandkatieharpiceland member
    @Kristy744 Wisdom teeth pulled with no medication? Wow! That's hardcore!! My mouth kinda hurts thinking about it :-D 
    Glad we're all good!! :-) :-)
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  • fireflygirl12fireflygirl12 member

    I would consider most men I know to be less hygienic than women I know, but I think even the grungiest of guys would figure out how to keep their peen clean. I'm sure one infection down there would make them pretty dedicated to the effort.

    I think that most kids aren't very hygienic, which is why I would probably not get my daughter's ears pierced at a young age. It will take some effort from one parent (hopefully DH) for the first several years, but it's definitely doable. The majority of men worldwide are not circumcised and I find it hard to believe that they are all running around with infected peens all the time.

    DS is circumcised, but I could go either way with it. I left it up to DH and did not see an issue with getting it done.

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  • AndrewsgalAndrewsgal member
    FWIW as far as kids being hygienic my 4.5 year old retracts his own foreskin and cleans himself all by himself in the shower. It took DH showing him twice and supervising a couple of more times. If my four year old can do it so can a grown man.
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  • fireflygirl12fireflygirl12 member
    FWIW as far as kids being hygienic my 4.5 year old retracts his own foreskin and cleans himself all by himself in the shower. It took DH showing him twice and supervising a couple of more times. If my four year old can do it so can a grown man.
    FTR I am in agreement with you.
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  • lilmama412lilmama412 member
    edited September 2013
    @Andrewsgal oh so you still couldn't find a quote from me that said all men are incapable of keeping themselves clean? That's what you said I said, I just want to know where I said it. Or where i said my husband was unclean?? You keep bringing up that's what I said, but you can't show me. I didn't play the PTSD or war veteran as a sympathy card, that's my life. I was just trying to tell you that you shouldn't attack people you don't know. Especially when you have no idea where they are coming from. My husband is a clean person who has never had an infection or funk. He has seen and done more then most people can imagine. He fought so your PERFECT husband can take his luxurious showers daily. Don't start judging people until you know their story. And even then don't judge people it's not becoming of you.
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  • AndrewsgalAndrewsgal member
    I can't argue with crazy you are literally making no sense. I am sorry about your husbands PTSD and hope with counseling he can learn to be clean again.
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  • RrrrrachelRrrrrachel member
    Lilmama you're making an ass out of yourself just let it go.
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  • katieharpicelandkatieharpiceland member
    I really, really want to post the Soundcloud track of every YEA ever said in a song by James Hetfield. FWIW, its totally appropriate for right now. Can't make it work on the ipad though.
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  • fireflygirl12fireflygirl12 member
    lilmama412 said:
    @Andrewsgal oh so you still couldn't find a quote from me that said all men are incapable of keeping themselves clean? That's what you said I said, I just want to know where I said it. Or where i said my husband was unclean?? You keep bringing up that's what I said, but you can't show me. I didn't play the PTSD or war veteran as a sympathy card, that's my life. I was just trying to tell you that you shouldn't attack people you don't know. Especially when you have no idea where they are coming from. My husband may not shower everyday like yours, but he is a clean person who has never had an infection or funk. He has seen and done more then most people can imagine. He fought so your PERFECT husband can take his luxurious showers daily. Don't start judging people until you know their story. And even then don't judge people it's not becoming of you.
    I come from a military family and have a ton of respect for war veterans. However, @andrewsgal obviously wasn't trying to knock your husband for being a war vet. There are lots of things that we don't know about each other's personal lives. I'm pretty sure that there are uncircumcised guys at war, or even in other areas where they don't have daily access to showering and they must manage to keep it clean.
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  • amhah09amhah09 member
    My first born is circ'ed but u don't want to circ again if this is a boy. My DH doesn't agree either. I'm putting it on the back burner until we find out the sex. Then I'll tell him he can look at the research and watch the videos and then we can have a legitimate discussion about it if he still disagrees.

    I'm torn because I already have one son circ'ed. If it done properly with the right anesthesia and such it's really not that bad I guess. I watched it (re: tried to watch it) a couple times during my nursery rotation and it just broke my heart. I just don't see myself willingly doing it again knowing it isn't really necessary as I had thought.

    Food for thought: Countries that do routine circumcision on baby girls say the do it for the same reasons ("it's cleaner" "it's cultural" etc).



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  • JrabbitvJrabbitv member
    HOLY HORMONES!!!
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  • JrabbitvJrabbitv member
    KadieA512 said:

    Jrabbitv said:

    Well let this just be a personal choice. There's so much 50/50 out there about a lot of pregnancy related issues. Some believe you can have a glass of wine while pregnant. You shouldn't die your hair while pregnant. You should consider natural birth. Should I vaccinate my child. Do research like you have and just do what you feel is best for your family.

    I disagree here (not just you PP a lot of people are saying this.) Don't just do it without putting real thought into it. Do your research, ask for evidence from doctors and professionals, have a healthy debate. I think if you look at the whole thread. The anti-circ'ers are all saying that based on the evidence they've seen they're choosing not to and the pro-circ'ers are just saying they are because. I think that's pretty interesting. But look at sites like the American Academy of Pediatricians' site. Stuff like that. Talk to your doctor or pediatrician about it. Make informed decisions about your child's healthcare.
    She's obviously trying to make an informed decision or else she wouldn't know both sides of circumcision. And we wouldn't be posting on this topic. I've heard both sides of men who were and weren't. Uncir never had an issue not being snipped no infections no problems,better feeling. The only negative I heard from the one being snipped was not much of feeling and couldn't stay hard long enough. Sorry just trying to state word for word. What she chooses she shouldn't be judged at the end of the day this is her family.
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  • SerenlaSerenla member
    I have a lot to chew on after this discussion. I will probably look into this more with DH after the scan in a few months. Thanks OP for posting and thanks for all of the responses.

    P.S. Lilmama take a chill pill and come back later to read what happened, not what you assumed to have happened.



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  • Bees EverywhereBees Everywhere member
    LOL I was wondering when this thread would crop up. I don't want to get into the arguments so I'll just say what we did. 
    I left the decision to my husband since he knows the equipment and I could see both sides. He was adamant about getting it done (for several reasons.) I insisted he be there when it was done (since I couldn't be) and it was apparently no big deal. Baby gets a sugar dipped paci while they numb the area then doesn't notice the act. He was much more upset to get his first bath my husband said. It healed quickly and it's been easy to clean. 
      
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  • mrscrcallimrscrcalli member
    DH wants to know why a room of women get to decide what to do with a penis when we don't have one. He said this should be moved to the daddy board. :-t
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  • AndrewsgalAndrewsgal member
    edited September 2013
    mrscrcalli said:

    DH wants to know why a room of women get to decide what to do with a penis when we don't have one. He said this should be moved to the daddy board. :-t

    Please tell me this is a joke. Your DH sounds like a treat. Our marriage is 50/50 on everything. I married my DH because we wanted to raise our kids as a team.


    In reality the only one who has a real vested interest in my sons penis is his future lovers. Should I wait and let them decide? A man saying something like this is so icky to me.
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