Hi Everyone,
I'm 14 weeks pregnant -used anonymous egg donor because I tried for so many years with my own eggs and just couldn't get pregnant. I'm super happy and have finally accepted that this was the only way I would be able to be a mom. My husband on the other hand still hasn't accepted it and we argue often about it. Does anyone go through this with their husband? I hate that he is not supportive. I felt alone at the beginning of all of this and still feel alone now. Any suggestions?
Hi, I am so sorry you're dealing with this. The unknowns of TPR can be very difficult on a marriage. I highly recommend talking to a counselor who deals with donor issues. Your husband probably has fears he has not vocalized yet, and a counselor may help draw them out for a healthy discussion.
And while this is not directly TPR or infertility related, my husband and I just read a fantastic book called The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. I cannot sing enough praises for it, it has made our marriage so much stronger and happier. In fact, I wrote a blog post about it this morning at www.wishingonasnowflake.com. I wish you loads of luck. Infertility is so hard on a marriage, and I know we've all been in a dark place because of it. Hugs to you!
************ Signature/Ticker Warning ************ Me (32) DH (36) - Finding our way to baby #1 Me: POF/DOR - AMH <0.16, heterozygous c677t MTHFR, insulin resistant and gluten intolerant DH: Severe MFI 12/2/11 - IUI #1- BFN 8/1/12 - IVF #1 - Zero response from max stims (600iu intramuscularly) My ovaries are just for decoration
12/6/12 - Adopted five embryos that had been frozen for over ten years! 2/11/13 - DEmbryo FET #1 Thawed four, sadly two didn't survive. Transferred two beautiful blasts. 2/16/13 - First BFP of my life @ 6dp5dt! EDD 10/30/13 3/27/13 - After beta and u/s hell, no heartbeat ever detected. D&C at 9w1d. 6/5/13 - Adopted four new embryos that had been frozen for seven years! 9/12/13 - DEmbryo FET #2. Thawed and transferred two beautiful blasts 9/17/13 - BFP @ 5dp6dt! EDD 05/31/14 9/29/13 - m/c @ 5w1d.
11/19/13 - DEmbryo FET #3. Thawed and transferred one blast from each batch. Wow! 11/23/13 - BFP @ 4dp6dt! EDD 8/7/13 Beta #1 @ 13dp6dt - 522 Beta #2 @ 16dp6dt - 1373 6w5d ultrasound showed one perfect baby with a beautiful heartbeat of 134bpm!
Snowflake baby is a girl! Our beautiful Snowflake girl arrived on July 22, 2014! My embryo adoption blog: Wishing on a Snowflake
Hi. We were in a similar situation when we used donor sperm for my son (now 14 months old). My husband went along for the ride, and entertained the idea, but was never really 100% happy about it. When we finally decided to go ahead and do ivf, he was still skeptical, and not 100% on board... but we proceeded. When our son got here, things instantly clicked and although the subject still came up, babies have a way of making it all better. We were a family and all of that went out the window. There is still a loss that comes from the fact that the child is not a biological product of your love, but what you gain from it is so much more. My husband could not love our son any more. Biology has nothing to do with it. I wish you all the best, and congrats!
Re: Husband problems
************ Signature/Ticker Warning ************
Me (32) DH (36) - Finding our way to baby #1
Me: POF/DOR - AMH <0.16, heterozygous c677t MTHFR, insulin resistant and gluten intolerant
DH: Severe MFI
12/2/11 - IUI #1- BFN
8/1/12 - IVF #1 - Zero response from max stims (600iu intramuscularly)
My ovaries are just for decoration
12/6/12 - Adopted five embryos that had been frozen for over ten years!
2/11/13 - DEmbryo FET #1 Thawed four, sadly two didn't survive. Transferred two beautiful blasts.
2/16/13 - First BFP of my life @ 6dp5dt! EDD 10/30/13
3/27/13 - After beta and u/s hell, no heartbeat ever detected. D&C at 9w1d.
6/5/13 - Adopted four new embryos that had been frozen for seven years!
9/12/13 - DEmbryo FET #2. Thawed and transferred two beautiful blasts
9/17/13 - BFP @ 5dp6dt! EDD 05/31/14
9/29/13 - m/c @ 5w1d.
11/19/13 - DEmbryo FET #3. Thawed and transferred one blast from each batch. Wow!
11/23/13 - BFP @ 4dp6dt! EDD 8/7/13
Beta #1 @ 13dp6dt - 522 Beta #2 @ 16dp6dt - 1373
6w5d ultrasound showed one perfect baby with a beautiful heartbeat of 134bpm!
Snowflake baby is a girl!
Our beautiful Snowflake girl arrived on July 22, 2014!
My embryo adoption blog: Wishing on a Snowflake
April 2013 DE IVF= BFN
September 2013 DE IVF (Fingers Crossed) = BFFFN! again...
October 2013 FET of our last 2 = Beta Hellzz for 6-7 Weeks. M/C
I wish you all the best, and congrats!
5 DIUI - BFN
IVF#1 - BFP - AJ 7/12
FET#1 - BFP Due 7/24/14