Has anyone felt a difference in their relationship with the DH since the baby? My husband and I were only married a month before we found out we were pregnant but we were together for 7 years prior. I know we love each other but with so little time for just him and I it seems we don't talk much at all! Sometimes it's like we live parallel lives. It makes me sad and someone worried... is anyone else having similar experiences?
Re: Marriage/ relationship ftm
Speaking of room mates, my husband and I are just living together, but not actually together right now. If he wants to act like room mates, that's what we'll be. When I started putting just as much effort into things as he does, things fell apart.
I disagree with the fact that you have to be together longer to make your marriage strong enough for a baby. I know a couple who had 7yrs and having a baby really hurt them as they were used to life just the two of them. I think it depends on the coping skills of both parents. I dont transition well and I never have. Every transition has been really straining for me.
I second getting out of the house sans bebe. We just barely started doing that.
My DH and I were married 10 years before the arrival of DS. And yes, it was so difficult the first year. We were so used to taking off on a whim and traveling, doing whatever we wanted. We no longer are able to do those things but we were prepared to transition to parenthood.
Things are much easier now and we still don't get a lot of alone time, but were ok with it being the 3 of us!
IMO I don't think marriage has anything to do with it. I've been married to by husband for 3 years and before that we together for 7 years. I think I got used to just the two of us for such a long time. We didn't has to be responsible for anyone. We could leave and do things together without notice.
I agree that it changed our relationship. It is soooo hard to find time to talk or do things together, but I highly recommend date night or even 20 min. to eat supper without LO. Don't get me wrong, I love my little guy. I think a strong parent relationship is important for a healthy child. I think this means spending sometime without LO. Try to remember some of things you did before LO came along for fun. Is there any way to quick fit those in during a nap? Cuddle and watch part of your fav. show.
I think it will get better once our children get a little more independent. Right now you have monitor a lot of what your LO does, which makes it difficult to find time for each other. Maybe the two of you could take the stroller and go for a walk. Is there activities you all could do together? Instead of one person monitoring baby and the other doing something else. Just some thoughts. Hang in there!
Everyone definitely helped me but this post made me feel a little better. It's been one hell of a year now the DH has a very stressful job now and I just feel like it consumes him. He is always tryin to hug me and love on me and Most of the time I am easily frustrate with him because I feel like I am the one with the baby all the time. I'm a little short with him. I think this is something we will work on and it probably would help if we got some time to ourselves. Thank you everyone!!!!