Baby Names

Would you pick a name your mom hates??

My mom was telling me about an "awful" name that a baby girl was just named...

 Mabel.

 I love that name, and it is on our list for DD2.

 Would you not use a name if you knew your mom HATED it? My mom doesn't know that is on our list, and she was just going on and on about how horrid it is.

 We don't announce the name until after the baby is born, so I'm not sure... It makes me almost want to take the name off our list. 

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Re: Would you pick a name your mom hates??

  • yup I sure would! just don't tell her before. 


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  • Your mom got to name her kids, so I wouldn't let her opinion influence you at all. Mable is totally NMS but if you love it your mom will learn to love it - or just get over it.
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  • I probably wouldn't. Knowing that your mom has no idea it's on your list and had that reaction would get me worried that a lot of other people would have the same reaction. That's just me though. I know the "right" answer is do whatever you want, who cares what other people think.
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  • I would, but only if I loved the name and was set.

    If I knew she hated the name I would tell her beforehand that I like it or if I planned to use it. I feel it would reduce all the drama that would otherwise be taken to the hospital.

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  • I did.

    My mom thinks that Josephine sounds like a frumpy old lady's name.  She exclusively calls her Josie, her NN.

    FTR-- we didn't share her name before birth.  My brother told me she hates DD's name-- she has never said so to my face.

     

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  • I probably wouldn't use it because my mom and me are really close and we see each other daily and I just wouldn't like her hating it. If we weren't that close or she just wasn't a fan I wouldn't care. I don't think she really liked DS1's name but she didn't hate it.

    On the other hand, I don't think the name is worthy of that degree of dislike without a reason so maybe she's being overly dramatic and just ignore her if you think she'll get over it.
  • We did.  My dad didn't like the first name we chose (Henry) and MIL hated the middle name so much she threatened to call him something else (Gordon).  But whatever they'll live with it.
  • My mother is not the kind of person to step on toes, she would never argue with me over names for my children. However, if I knew she really didn't like a name I might think twice about it. Her opinion is not the end all be all but I do care.
  • I think I will probably take it off our list.

    It would bother me forever to know that she detests the baby's name.

    We have a few other names that we LOVE, so I'm going to just cut it. 

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  • imagelaurasusan:
    I wouldn't, but I think I'm in the minority on this board.I would hate to know she disliked my child's name. She doesn't have to LOVE it, just not loathe it.nbsp;I know names like Mabel are popular on this board, but I think in the real world, most people think it's a pretty unappealing name to give a baby. nbsp;I know that wasn't your question, just my opinion.
    .

    Exactly this.
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  • I would. I am a big stickler on not letting family ruin names for us.  

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  • Considering you have other names you love, I'd drop this one.

    But if it was the only name I loved, and it seemed to fit my child, my mom could shove it. But she's good about that sort of thing. She didn't much like half of her grandkids' names at first, but soon realized they were perfect names for each of them

  • I would still use it, my Mom is super picky about EVERYTHING. She has voiced not liking two of my nieces/nephews names before when they were first born but no admits their names fit them perfectly. So when we decided on DS's name, it's a very common not very used name (a family name on DH's side) she wasn't too into it. But now she comments how it fits him. 

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  • If my mom absolutely despised a name it would be difficult for me to name my child I think. Which is why when I was pregnant with DS we didn't tell anyone the name until he was born, because I didn't want to hear the comments. Turns out they love it and if they didn't I'm not sure they would have told me at that point. 

    I have thrown out names that we like now and I can tell she doesn't care for them. Our number one choice is for a girl is Amelia. I mentioned it once and she said "that's an old lady name". She then said she knows someone that has a granddaughter named Kylie and she really likes it. Ewwww no thanks. For some reason her taste now is trendy and mine is classic, so I know we will disagree. I'm not too concerned about it and probably won't tell when we've decided anyway. 

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  • I love that name! And I know for a fact that my mother hates it.. She also was very vocal about her hate towards our #1 name for our girl, Hazel. I decided that I don't care what she thinks. I don't like my name, so clearly we don't have the same taste! I'd use it. Once she begins to associate the name with a beautiful baby girl, she will get over it and become fond of the name. (hopefully) :)
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  • TheWopTheWop member

    I sure would.  My mom already had a chance to name her kids.  I have a very open and blunt relationship with my mom and have no problem flat out telling her "That sucks.  Too bad, so sad." if she doesn't like a name on my list. She also would not be offended by my being blunt in telling her too bad. 

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  • yes. She had her chance to pick a name (when she had you). The baby is yours and your H's, you are the only two people that get a say in the name.
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    My mom hated the name we chose for DD and tried some passive aggressive ways to get us to change it. She was informed that she had her chance to name a daughter (three, actually) and she had no say in naming her granddaughter. Nearly three months after DD was born and she's coming around. While she doesn't love the name, her friends do, so she knows she's in the minority and she's actually starting to like it. 
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  • Yes, because of a generation difference our moms hate most of the names we like.   I do not care if anyone else likes the name.   We do not share until birth for this reason.
  • image913mom:
    Yes, because of a generation difference our moms hate most of the names we like.   I do not care if anyone else likes the name.   We do not share until birth for this reason.

     Yep.  I think my mother and I generally have different taste in names, so for her not to like a name that we love, I don't think it would be a big deal to me.


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  • This is a generational problem. Names go in 100 year cycles. To her, Mabel is a super outdated name, like how we feel about Donna and Brenda. She'll get over it. Your tastes will always be different. Remember she's from the generation that loved Jennifer and Amber. There may not be a lot of common ground and that's to be expected. 
  • Yes, I would but I also wouldn't tell her beforehand. Like others have said, moms have had their chance to name kids, my H's is the only opinion that would matter to me.
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  • imageMrMrsandBaby:
    Your mom got to name her kids, so I wouldn't let her opinion influence you at all. Mable is totally NMS but if you love it your mom will learn to love it or just get over it.


    I totally agree!
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  • I did. Before we were even expecting we talked about names and my mom didn't like the name we picked for DD1. She likes it now, so I'd say go for it. Once it's the name of their adorable grandbaby, they learn to like it.
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  • If you love it, use it. If it's her grandchild, your mom will learn to love the name.




  • I wouldn't use it. It would bother me too much.




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  • imageWashingtonQueen:
    My mother is not the kind of person to step on toes, she would never argue with me over names for my children. However, if I knew she really didn't like a name I might think twice about it. Her opinion is not the end all be all but I do care.

     

    Exactly this 

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  • Bottom line, yes. Apparently FIL hated DS1's name at first because it was as fusty old man to him as Mabel probably is to your mom. Even if I had known he hated it, it wouldn't have made a difference to me.

    If we were to ever have two daughters, the top name for a 2nd girl would be my the same as my aunt's name (and my mom does not get along with her SIL) so I know she would be offended.  But it is a different spelling of the name, honoring a different saint, and would have a different NN from what my aunt goes by. But it is one of the few names DH and I both like so we would use it in spite of my mom's reaction. We will likely never have a second daughter, so it is probably a moot point.

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  • Yes, I'd still use it. It may be difficult to come to the decision, because you know your mom doesn't like it, but she'll get used to it. It's your baby, so you get to decide.
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  • If it was a name that I LOVED and was 100% decided on, it wouldn't matter much to me if someone didn't like it, even if that someone was my mom.

    However, if it was just a name I liked and was considering, but had other names that I liked equally as much, then I'd probably take it off the list if one of our closest family members hated it. 

  • skioskio member
    Sure would. My kid, not hers. 
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  • We're always team green and MIL hated our girl name for DS1. She kept quiet about it until our due date, then called DH and basically stated that we were cruel people to name our daughter that. Well, DS1 came and was named the boy name we had picked out, which was apparently acceptable, but the girl name is forever ruined for me. It hurt way too much to hear her say those things, how could I possibly bestow my daughter with a name that would fill MIL with so much disdain, she could say things to an overdue woman that would make her break down and cry?

    I wish I had the balls to use the name anyway. It's my child and I do love the name dearly. But I don't, so I won't. It's heartbreaking. I'm in the camp of taking it off the list. For the people who say do it - more power to you, I can totally respect that! I'm jealous, really. 


     

     

     
  • My baby boy will be the fourth. My mom hates this idea. She knows well enough not to tell me, but my sister told me Mom hates it. I do not care.



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  • Yes, it is not my mom's decision. If I loved it and so did my H, I would totally use it. Our child, our decision!

    ETA: We are naming our son William and will be using Liam as a NN later on.  My dad doesn't like Liam and prefers Will(y).  I HATE Will(y) and Bill(y).  I've told my dad that he can either call him William then.  

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  • My Mom went on and on a few weeks ago about Francesca. "How could you saddle a baby with such a name?!!?" she asked.

    Her hating it made me like it more, especially since everyone else loves it. Can't wait to see the look on her face when baby is born. I am not confirming or denying any name IRL until then so I can piss her off even more. I'm a jerk, but I can't believe how she laid into me about such a normal name.

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  • First of all, I think Mabel's adorable.  It isn't my style necessarily, but if I met a little girl with that name I'd think it was sweet.  

    Second, if I absolutely loved a name, and if there were no other strong contenders that I loved just as much, I'd go for it.  You might consider, though, what kind of mother you have.  Is she the kind who would take one look at your daughter and exclaim "little Mabel" to be the best baby ever?  Or is she the kind to hold grudges and call your baby something else and bring it up over and over and over again forever and ever?  Just something to think about.   

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  • probably. I am very close with my mom but she named all her kids after family members so she gets no credit from me in the name department lol. Shell learn to love it. She had her chance to name her kids, this is my time :)

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  • If you love it, you should use it.

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  • I would for sure take it off my list, in fact I took a name off of our list because my sister absolutely hated it. we were dead set on it, and 2 weeks after telling my sister I couldn't do it so we changed it. I am glad we did because I am so over it now anyway. 
  • I wouldn't use it if my mom hates a name.  However, if my mom just merely disliked a name, I'd consider it, especially if we didn't have many other options we loved.  If there were other names that I liked equally well, I'd consider using something else.
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