- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
3rd Trimester
pivey
member
"do you judge people who have an epi"
pivey
member
Well, yes and no. I think there are a LOT of people who go into birth with little to no knowledge of the process and their options. Every class I have had at my hospital has been terrifying - people going to get c/s in 2 days and having no idea how it works or what recovery entails, etc.
I guess I don't judge if you choose to get an epi and have been fully educated as to risks, complications, etc and know what you and baby are in for. If you blindly follow what a doctor says, know none of your options, know nothing about what drugs and procedures do to you or your baby then yes, I am probably judging you...
This discussion has been closed.
Re: "do you judge people who have an epi"
i'm with you on this one, pivey!
but we're the crazy "bradley" people lol!
No, I don't. And I don't judge people who have inductions, if they are medically necessary... I don't want an induction and I plan on getting an epi. Perhaps this is why! :P
Have you given birth before? Just as an FYI, somewhere between 85% and 95% of people get an epi. Sit around and judge if you want, I find that activity boring, but I happen to believe that the 8 years plus my doctor spent studying to be an OB make he or she more of an expert on giving birth than I am, oh and the thousands of babies they have delivered.
Lots of them are trying to cover their ass though. Why do you think c-sections are on the rise? Doctor friendly...they are in and out with the quick procedure. They don't like women hanging around laboring for hours on end. Doctors are not all knowing and make mistakes too.
Unfortunately there will always be people who don't do research and just trust their doc. It happens with all medical conditions, not just PG. Hell, if I would have listened to my OB and didn't do my research about PCOS and seek other help, I probably wouldn't even be PG now!
My point below is that whatever she decides is her choice. I'm not the one who will have to possibly deal w/ more extreme contractions due to being induced (at least I hope not) or having an emergency c-section because of the induction.
I guess I am being a softy today...
I dont think it is our place to judge anyone on what their personal choices are when it comes to them having their baby. Me personally know that I have the lowest pain tolerance in the world. I know that for me personally it would be the biggest mistake to try to have the baby natural (if that was an option for me) just because I would miss the beauty in the experience due to the pain.
I dont care how many classes / techniques or what have you that you teach me once pain enters the picture you have pretty much lost me and my entire focus.
So are you going to judge me because I might not know all the ins and outs and wherefores to having a Epi and the effects?
It is so easy to sit on the computer and throw out thoughts and ideas on what you think it the "right" or "wrong" way of handling birth and getting educated but until you have walked a block in that person's shoes - you really do not know and therefore, you should not judge them.
she's not "judging" women who get an epi. ?she's saying to do your research and understand your options throughout L&D. ?it is scary the amount of women who truly don't know what their options are or don't understand complications that can arise. ?i agree that doctors have tons of experience and we should trust their decisions, but i think it's also part of being a responsible parent to understand how your decisions will affect your baby. ?and i believe that is what Pivey is trying to say.?
Actually, I asked Pivey if she judged those who have an epi because of her statement below:
I just don't understand, and probably never will, pumping your body with synthetics and complication inducing drugs if you don't have to.
No if you read her post she says yes she does judge if you are uneducated on the effects of an Epi and what it does to your child - but that brings me back to my post - who are you to judge anyone for any reason whatsoever! You have your beliefs and that is great for YOU...but who are you to tell anyone their choice is wrong - whether they know the full effects or not. You dont know what is going on with them - their frame of mind - their body - but because they go into a hospital and say yes I want an Epi you immediate think they are wrong. PA-LEASE get real...
I don't know that I'd say the c-sections are doctor friendly... just percieved to be patient friendly. You're in for a longer stay at the hospital and I'm sure just as many complications can arise from cutting someone open as delivering vaginally.
well, i don't want to speak for Pivey, but i think that's slightly taking her thoughts out of context. ?i understood it to mean that if you can get through the pain without the meds then why get the meds? ?but i am actually understanding her OP to mean that she does not understand why expectant parents do not educate themselves on their options. ?again, i don't want to speak for Pivey, and i probably shouldn't have in my response. ?but that's how i understood it.?
Nope. Because then I'd be one of the 'bad' guys since I had one.
I judge nothing about another woman's birth since every experience is individual, different, and completely none of my business.
I personally research as much as I can, but that doesn't mean that those who don't are 'bad'.
i totally agree with you that is does not make sense to call c-sections doctor friendly major complications can arrise from a c/s that put the dr. at just as much of a risk as a vag birth.
I think I can safely agree with this statement...
Ditto
I have never gone through childbirth. ?I have had 14 surgeries because of volleyball. ?I will be getting an epi....no question. ?I had an epi for my last knee surgery and it was great. ?Actually, I'm positive it's the only way I survived days after the surgery. ?I have had every kind of?anesthesia and?pain killers and I'm perfectly fine. ?I am a pro athlete and know how to breathe, focus, etc. ?I'm sure I've gone through more pain than most women here. ?At the end of the day, if you choose to deliver med free- good for you. ?If you can deliver a happy, healthy baby and not want to rip your face off in the process, why wouldn't you???
?
And what difference does it make if you ask for one right away or get one later? ?Either way, you get the drugs. ?It's not a contest to see how much pain you can endure.
I absolutely don't judge. What's right for me may not be what's right for someone else.
What I do judge are people who don't take the time to research their options. It seems like half the people I watch on A Baby Story or Birth day have no idea what labor is about and what is going to happen with their bodies or their babies and that to me is worse than making an educated decision to use an epidural.
What are you talking about? They are extremely doctor friendly. They can be in and out in as little as 20 minutes. They don't have to "waste their time" hanging around waiting for the woman to push out her baby. OBs are first and foremost trained surgeons. They don't see many natural births and cesareans are what's normal to them...hence the cesarean rise in our country.
I can see this happening...I am more amazed that people have that great of pain tolerance. I know me and I know my body and I know for a fact that I cant stand pain in the slightest so I dont think I would be able to handle it. Well I know from being in labor that I couldnt do it. So it might be a combination of maybe some of them think your naive and some are maybe like me - and are just amazed by your strength...
Yep this bugs me too. Sounds like a completely uneducated response and view of drugs in labor.
For me, I think it really depends on what you want out of the experience. I have this one friend who is constantly judging me because I don't want to have a home birth. To each their own. I'd really like to think that I could handle that, but I really just don't know. I feel more comfortable giving birth in a place with medical interventions on site. I'll probably ask for the epidural even though I feel like I'm pretty informed and kind of granola earthy-crunchy (eat organic, compost everything I can, try to avoid medication or chemicals in any form). I go through books ravenously, ask lots of questions of my friends and doctors, and look into things myself.
I like the advice that I read in the girlfriend's guide-- They don't give out awards after birth to the mothers who do it pain free. I give kudos to those ladies who can and do, but I'm not going to give myself a raging case of PPD over it if I'm not one of them.
Actually Megs is right both times. No, I am not an OBGYN - but I still want to know all I can about my body and birth and I think there are far too many 10 minute appointment in-and-out, drive through style practices out there that teach a woman nothing about her body, her baby, or L&D. Unfortunately because of that we have to do what is the very best for us. Doctors are human and make mistakes. Sometimes they aren't up on the most current research, sometimes they just have preferences, sometimes they are just scared and want to "cover their as$es" - for whatever the reason I believe we must be our own best advocates and discuss our options fully and with some knowledge. Blind following never produced much good in the world - in a myriad of circumstances.
And yes, I did say "I just don't understand, and probably never will, pumping your body with synthetics and complication inducing drugs if you don't have to." I stand by that point firmly - if you have the ability to not potentially complicate your pregnancy or put yourself or your child at risk, I don't understand why you would elect to do so. I can't understand why people run in front of trains everyday either - but people do and then get hit. It's just a choice people make. It isn't the one I would choose if I could prevent it.
c's are a huge, major surgery. ?HARDLY what i'd call doctor friendly. ?they may be quick, but considering you're in the hospital twice as long for recovery, the risks associated with them are not what i'd consider "doctor-friendly". ?i wouldn't even consider them patient friendly. ?nothing is friendly about cutting through my uterine wall.??
(this was edited as i didn't post my response properly)?
They also get paid more.
?
Deegirl, Honestly!
Why are you so anti-medicine? almost all of your posts regarding this issue reflect that and many things you really have not researched completely.
Are you having your delivery at home with a MW? I honestly wouldn't want to work at the hospital you are delivering at. God knows what reason you'll find to sue.
Yes Drs. are humans they make mistakes and you should be proactive but your reasons to talk badly about all these things just don't make sense to me.
Soon to celebrate the day we met, even if the day before marks when we said goodbye.
Wait a minute!!!! Have you had an C-Section????
This is not as cut and dry as you would like to make it sound. I had a C-Section and believe me it is not a simple process for a doctor. It is not something my doctor would have preferred to do. I dont know what doctors you have been around - but I do know my doctor and the team of doctors that were there for my last year when I had to have my C-Section and believe me when I say - they waited...and waited...and did everything in their power to not only stop my labor but they waited for me and my husband to make a decision and they were willing to do whatever we wanted to do. It all came down to my doctor telling my husband he rather have one body than two and it now was up to me and my husband to pick!!!!
So to sit up here and casually throw out your comment that they dont see natural births as normal as C-Section is a totally irresponsible statement and its people like you who make it hard to be on the boards and not want to kick in their screens!!!!
I am going into this wanting to go natural. I of course know I can't control things that will happen during labor and am keeping an open mind for the health of myself and the baby if something goes wrong. I've educated myself to the fullest and know the risks of drugs. No, I'm delivering with an OB in a hospital. If things don't make sense to you, maybe you should do a little more research for yourself.
I said they don't see natural med-free births that often anymore. Look at the c-section numbers for christ sake! There are many doctors out there who prefer to have you scheduled for a c-section. Yes, they are MAJOR surgery, which is why I want to avoid one unless it's an emergency.