Should we cancel?

JANCANDANCE · April 2013

My shower is Saturday and we only have 6 RSVP's. The host asked if I would like to cancel and I told her it was totally up to her. Was this okay? I don't want to put her out in any way. I'm really bummed but I don't know what to do?

EastCoastBride · April 2013

No. Have your host contact the other guests and no matter how "few" come, still have the shower. There is NOTHING wrong w/ a small shower. And to cancel - what does it say to the people who do plan to come? "Oh- your company isn't good enough. I wanted LOTS of people!".

JANCANDANCE · April 2013

Thank you. I felt this way myself but when the host asked I rattled me a bit. I appreciate that.

pearlsonthebeach · April 2013

I know everyone and every social circle is different, but I think about that many people RSVPed to my shower, and I had like 60 people show up (it was a co-ed, casual party).

People really tend to not RSVP anymore, or they tell you in passing that they're coming and think that's the same thing, or they think they did, or whatever. It sucks when you're trying to plan for food and such, but you can never count on your RSVP number anymore!

PrimRoseMama · April 2013

Um, 6 people is still a good turn out. What were you expecting?

rubysue267 · April 2013

IMO, 6 people is a great turnout (especially if you're like me and prefer smaller crowds anyway). I don't know that it's necessarily "rude" to cancel because of the turnout, but if I were one of those guests who rsvp'd and was told that the shower was a no-go because there weren't enough people...I don't know. That just seems to say, "Well, there won't be enough gifts to justify the party" and honestly, I would feel sort of put-out. A shower doesn't have to be big to be fun and meaningful. I'm kind of side-eying your hostess for even suggesting a cancellation.

I'm also willing to bet that a lot of people are planning to attend and just didn't RSVP. Basic etiquette seems to have flown the coop over the past few years. If only 6 people attend, then just enjoy your intimate and stress-free shower Big Smile

526SadieSadie · April 2013

6 people have RSVPd and plant to spend a few hours away from what they'd regularly be doing on a weekend. Cancelling for a reason other then sickness is ungrateful.

I do think your hostess would be totally justified in calling people who didn't RSVP to see if they are coming or not. That is truly irritating when people don't have the consideration to RSVP.

cinderin · April 2013

I would not cancel. Those six may have turned down other plans to come to your shower, and now you want to cancel on them? Poor form!

Monkeybutt80 · April 2013

Don't cancel! It will still be a great intimate shower.

JANCANDANCE · April 2013

Ditto to PP, I do not want to cancel but my hostess made me feel some kind of way for suggesting it. I definitely gave her a side eye and just told her it was up to her.......but I agree I would be annoyed if I planned to attend an the event was cancelled.

yomama2013 · April 2013

Don't cancel. Still have the shower. I had a small one with only ten people and we all had fun playing games and eating good food! You can have a great time. I would have the hostess call everyone one last time to see if anyone else will be able to make it and if not it is what it is. I did that for my sons bday and out of all the people I invited four people and all their kids came and we still had a good time! That's what its all about.

gbride1 · April 2013

I also am having my shower this weekend and only about 6 of the 10-12 people we invited will be able to come but so what! I was a little bumed out at first but that's 6 people that really care about me and are willing to take time out of their weekend to be there for me! That and we could really ues the gifts:-P

Don't be sad just go have fun!

Hollywogg · April 2013

I wouldn't cancel. People don't seem to rsvp anymore and more might show up than expected. It's pretty rude to not RSVP and then show up if the invites specifically said to RSVP. I had almost twice as many guests show than had rsvpd at a shower I helped with, not fair to the hosts who are trying to anticipate numbers for food and such but...it happens.

amie444 · April 2013

My shower this past weekend was 9 including me and was Awesome. We had so much fun

ellewoodsSC · April 2013

I bet a lot more than 6 will show up, but if they don't, 6 is still a worthy of an intimate get together. People just don't seem to RSVP these days and that's rude.

rhubarb123 · April 2013

It is your host's "job" to contact everyone that did not RSVP. It is surprising how many people think they don't need to because you "know" they will be there. If, after she contact all of people that didn't RSVP, you still end up with 6 guests that makes 8. That is exactly how many I had at one of my showers. It was a great number! Your host might have to rearrange some of her ideas - games, etc. but otherwise the only thing is she'll need less food.

JANCANDANCE · April 2013

rhubarb123:
It is your host's "job" to contact everyone that did not RSVP.nbsp; It is surprising how many people think they don't need to because you "know" they will be there.nbsp; If, after she contact all of people that didn't RSVP, you still end up with 6 guests that makes 8.nbsp; That is exactly how many I had at one of my showers.nbsp; It was a great number!nbsp; Your host might have to rearrange some of her ideas games, etc. but otherwise the only thing is she'll need less food.

Thanks!!

BeckyTheEngineer · April 2013

Are tons of people not coming for a specific reason, like there is another big event in your social circle/family this weekend? If there is a substantial crowd that cannot come because there is something else going on (a wedding? graduation?) then I would consider rescheduling. But otherwise, I think 6 guests sounds like a fun, intimate party.

msyoon · April 2013

has the host contacted the guests? sometimes people forget to rsvp? 6 guests is still a good amount to have for a shower... If the host WANTS to cancel than that's another issue but if she is still willing to do it with the small group, i say keep it and enjoy the day!

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