Adoption

Any birthmothers around here?

I'm new to TheBump as my DH and I have just started TTC...are there any other birthmothers around here - or is this board just for adoptive parents? 

I'm a birthmother to a 5-year-old daughter who I placed in a very open adoption and would love to connect with others!

BabyFruit Ticker
DD placed in open adoption 2/2007
Married in 5/2010
DD 5/2015
DS 3/2016
EDD 4/29/19

Re: Any birthmothers around here?

  • I'm pregnant right now and considering placing my boys, don't know if that counts?

    This board is pretty open to anybody affected by adoption. 

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  • There are several birth mother's on here. Welcome to the board.
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  • imagegreenteabee:

    I'm pregnant right now and considering placing my boys, don't know if that counts?

    This board is pretty open to anybody affected by adoption. 

     

    Ah - good to know it's a place for anyone that's part of the triad.

    Let me know if you ever need anything during this time for you - I know that it's comforting to talk with someone who has been there. Thinking of you! 

    BabyFruit Ticker
    DD placed in open adoption 2/2007
    Married in 5/2010
    DD 5/2015
    DS 3/2016
    EDD 4/29/19
  • I'm not a birthmom, but I wanted to say welcome!  We love hearing the perspectives of different triad members, especially when figuring out how to navigate the waters of contact with birth families, etc.
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  • Hi, 

    I'm a birthmom. I placed my birthson in an open adoption ten years ago. We have an open adoption with visits. 

    I have found this board very welcoming and have been appreciative of seeing all the perspectives on here.  

     

     

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  • I'm not a birthmom, but just wanted to say hi and welcome to the board. I haven't been around long, but I've found that folks here are very welcoming. Looking forward to hearing your perspective on things.
  • Hello,

    I mostly lurk but I'm a birthmom of a 15 year old girl.  We too have a very open adoption.  I also have 3 yo and 6 month old sons.  

    For me, having my sons brought out a lot of new feelings about my daughter and her adoption that I wasn't really prepared for and had a really hard time working through, despite the fact that I've always been really confidant in the decision I made back then.  I basically went through the whole grieving process over again after the birth of my older son as it was only then that I was really able to process the loss of my daughter. 

    I'm not trying to project these issue on you at all, but I've tried a little to find some resources or support for this stage of the adoption journey and have so far come up empty on that front.  So I guess my point is, please post if you find yourself in the same position and are looking for someone to talk to has been down this road.

    Best of luck! 

  • I am not a birthmother, but just wanted to say welcome to the board!!  There are lots of wonderful ladies on here, please post often, this is a great source of support.


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  • Not a BM, but welcome to the board.  As a PAP so appreciative of BM's like you.
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    Failed Matches - December 2012, May 2013, December 2013
    Moved on to  gestational surrogacy with a family friend who is our angel and due 7/23/15


  • imageSquirrel29:

    Hello,

    I mostly lurk but I'm a birthmom of a 15 year old girl.  We too have a very open adoption.  I also have 3 yo and 6 month old sons.  

    For me, having my sons brought out a lot of new feelings about my daughter and her adoption that I wasn't really prepared for and had a really hard time working through, despite the fact that I've always been really confidant in the decision I made back then.  I basically went through the whole grieving process over again after the birth of my older son as it was only then that I was really able to process the loss of my daughter. 

    I'm not trying to project these issue on you at all, but I've tried a little to find some resources or support for this stage of the adoption journey and have so far come up empty on that front.  So I guess my point is, please post if you find yourself in the same position and are looking for someone to talk to has been down this road.

    Best of luck! 

     

     

    See - this is my biggest fear about having another baby and probably why I've subconsciously put it off this long. 

    I, too, have always been very confident in the decision, etc. but you hit the nail on the head in how it can make so many things resurface. 

    Thanks for sharing your experience and being willing to support me!

    BabyFruit Ticker
    DD placed in open adoption 2/2007
    Married in 5/2010
    DD 5/2015
    DS 3/2016
    EDD 4/29/19
  • This is awesome; Thank you all for your warm welcomes. So glad to have found a community to be a part of - I look forward to learning more about you all and being a part of the discussions. :)
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DD placed in open adoption 2/2007
    Married in 5/2010
    DD 5/2015
    DS 3/2016
    EDD 4/29/19
  • I put off having my sons for a very long time and while sometimes it has been really hard and, in all honesty, there are things that will just always be hard, having my sons really helped me work through some of the things I had been sort of ignoring for a long time and I'm much happier in general now.  I hope that you don't have a hard time with it, but if you do I would be more than happy give whatever support I can.

    I can also tell you that now that my older son is 3 and a big brother he understands the significance of having an older half sister (which is the term her family used and took me a long time to get used to) and watching them together during our visits is probably the most beautiful thing I have ever experienced.

  • Not a Bm, but welcome!
    Married on 3.20.2004. It took 30 month, 2 failed adoptions and IVF for our first miracle. We have had 9 foster kids since he was born and started the domestic adoption process when he was 10 month old, we had 4 failed matches in that time. After our daughter was born we brought her home and spent 2 weeks fearing we might lose her because of complications that came up. But Praise God all went through and she is ours forever! Expecting again after IVF Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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