- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Baby Names
jlrschmidt
member
Is this name offensive?
jlrschmidt
member
in Baby Names
We really want to name our son Cohen. DH and I both really like it, and we have been calling him that ever since we found out he was a boy. At this point, I cannot change his name (we will probably change the spelling now though).
However. DH came across an article online yesterday that was debating the political correctness of naming a child this name because it is a Jewish surname that means essentially God, or Jesus, and it is offensive for someone to use this as a first name, especially if they are not Jewish (which we are not). Someone even said that naming a child Cohen is like naming them "God is dead" because it connotates disrespect for the religion.
I do not want to be disrespectful to anyone (let me assure you that if it seems that way, it was only pure ignorance in not knowing that people felt this way about the name). So my questions are:
1. Are the Irish spellings Coen, Cohan, or the Scottish Cowen or Cowan less offensive since they have very different meanings?
2. Which spelling do you like best?
https://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2009/05/05/the-big-baby-naming-battle.html Here is the link to the article if anyone is interested.
Warning
No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Is this name offensive?
I think it's ridiculous that people are using the name Cohen as first name. Is it offensive to me as a practicing Jew, no not really, but I think it is incredibly weird and culturally insensitive.
If you must name your son Cohen I would go with an alternative spelling.
This. I don't find it offensive (though I am zero percent religious so take that with a grain of salt) but I find it strange for the bolded reason above. If you do go with it definitely use Coen or Cowan.
As a Jew wth the maiden name Cohen, it amazes me that anybody (regardless of religion) would name their LO Cohen. It's like naming him Goldblatt or Steinberg. Cohen is a loaded surname that should stay that way. FWIW, it means "high priest," which is like royalty and Cohens are given special privileges in the Jewish religion that I won't bother getting into. I'm proud to have this legacy, but in all honesty, I was glad to change my name upon marriage. I never thought Cohen sounded especially nice and it's, well, so Jewish.
What do you and DH love about it? I'd go with something Irish and better sounding like Colin.
I'm not all that religious, but do find the concept of using Cohen as a first name a little off-putting. But I generally prefer surnames as first names when they are family names.
What about Cullen? Or Callum?
While there are differing opinions on whether using the name Cohen is offensive, I think it is at least culturally insensitive.
I would not want to saddle my child with a name full of controversy. I would steer clear of the name entirely, including the Irish spellings. I would not want to cause any offense or any hardship for my child.
When you say his name on the playground, no one will know how it is spelled. For most people, the last name Cohen will come to mind because it is more common than Coen. Do you really want to have to constantly explain that his name is the Irish Coen and that you mean no disrespect to the Jewish faith? I imagine it would get old really quick.
Just out of curiosity, why do you consider Asher a surname name? It's the first name of one of the 12 sons of Israel, right?
OP, what do you like about Cohen? The sound? If it's the sound, there are plenty of Irish names that have a similar feel, like Cullen, Conan, etc.
Nail meeting head here.
yes!
I'm not religious, I was raised Catholic but no longer practice. I don't really know anything about other religions, especially when it comes to prominent or significant names, customs, etc. I also don't set out to try to offend people, I try to respect other peoples' points of view just as I hope they respect mine. We are all entitled to them, and I don't take that away from anybody.
That being said, I've never had a problem with the name Cohen, I've heard it before and I like how it sounds. I haven't specifically identified it as sounding like a 'surname' name like Brown or Jones or Morris and so on. I also have not previously thought about it's origin based on its sound. It doesn't sound specifically Jewish to me, where as Svetlana screams Russian to me. If asked, I'd probably suggest it was Irish or English.
I did google the name, and just looking at Wikipedia it states Cohen is a Jewish surname comparable in its commanity to Smith, while Kohen is a Jewish priest. (The spelling may be irrelevant to the meaning, I'm def not trying to split hairs here over the spelling but just stating what I found on a quick search.) I've searched a few phrases to find more and while I can see that it has a strong meaning in the Jewish faith, I haven't found one statement to indicate that it is a derogatory name or definition in any way.
Personally, I'm not offended easily so my opinion stems from how I am. So from a religion standpoint: If an athiest wants to name their kids Mary and Joseph, I don't get mad that they're using the names of the parents of Jesus Christ just because I don't believe in Jesus Christ. I also didn't care when I was a practicing Catholic if anyone used those names. I don't get offended when I see a Christmas Tree or Menorah on display publicly, nor do I call them holiday trees and seasonal candelabrums because they are Christmas Trees and Menorahs so that is what I call them. I say Merry Christmas when it's Christmas, just as I say Happy Hanukkah to my Jewish friends during Hanukkah, just as I say Happy New Year on Dec 31 and Jan 1, just as I say Happy Birthday when it's someone's birthday.
For me, something has to be derogatory to be offensive, it has to conjure up true nastiness, real hurtful connotations and reminders. Remember those parents that named their kids Adolf Hitler, Aryan Nation and Honszlynn Hinler? I find those names offensive. If someone names their kid White Power or Black Panther or James Earl Ray or any other name or phrase with immediate widespread recognition for the bad that it represents, I find these offensive. These are names and phrases that have historical significance to them, and none of it is pretty. They would all be hugely offensive.
If you like the name as is, use it. If you feel the need to change the spelling to something you can be happy with, do it. If you want to pick an entirely different name, do it.
It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s that I don’t know you. Stranger Danger.
I'm sorry that you have to consider changing your baby name! We had Cohen in our top 3 before we found out we were having a girl. i love the name. I am not Jewish and never would have thought it would offend people. I feel like people pull names from all kinds of religions and nationalities all over the world. people often ask specifically for names from this culture or that culture. i know culture & religion is different, but i personally think it is ridiculous that people are offended by it. it is a name, obviously you are not naming your son that to say that "God is Dead" or whatever. This actually irritates me! I say keep the name. Maybe change the spelling if you are worried about it. I liked Cowen/Cowan when we had it on our list, but Coen is fine too.
I guess I agree it's kinda like a non-Christian naming their kid Jesus but as a Christian I wouldn't find that offensive (unless that parents meant offense KWIM).
I think people might assume that baby Cohen is Jewish. So as a non-Jewish person, if I loved the name I would definitely go with a different spelling. I think Coen is pretty good.
I am not Jewish and don't know many Jewish people. I have never heard of this name, so I would not think twice if someone named their kid Cohen.
First of all, to the bolded: it does not. Especially the Jesus part. This is like Judaism 101.
Second, Cohen is originally a Hebrew name, which means it's been transliterated into languages with Latin alphabets in different ways. Coen is one of them, off the top of my head, and there are others (e.g. Kahn, not that I've ever seen anyone suggest that as a first name).
Third: I am squiffy about the use of random surnames as first names in general because to me it sounds like you're appropriating someone else's heritage. My aunt is the family genealogist on my mom's side and has researched her dad's Italian side more than her mom's Jewish side. Why? Well, the language and geographical barriers, but also I would guess that any family history left in Europe was destroyed in the twentieth century. I can understand why Jews and especially Cohens are extremely protective of their heritage, because so many people have tried to wipe it out. Respect that.
This is essentially why I dislike Cohen as a first name. I'm not Jewish and Cohen doesn't appeal to me as a first name, but after I learned about the controversy I wouldn't come near it. It just smacks of cultural appropriation to me- taking something that is sacred to a group of people and reducing its meaning and history to nothing.
To the bolded, I did not mean to actually say that Cohen means God or Jesus (that came out very wrong, I apologize), I was actually referring to the point in the article where someone equated naming one's child who wasn't Jewish to naming them "God is dead" or a non Christian naming their child "Jesus".
I do respect that, and DH and I are seriously considering changing the name altogether, but I have been doing a bit of research on the alternate spellings. Coen is actually german, short for Coenraad, a version of Conrad, which means brave advisor (Coen=brave, raad=advice). I'm not saying that it's not also a translation of Cohen into another language, but it also means something entirely different. The other Irish and Scottish spellings have equally different meanings. Is that really still offensive?
Let me reiterate that I really didn't know this was an issue before (maybe I should have after having chosen the name and using it for several weeks, that is my fault). We will definitely not be using the Cohen spelling, that much is for sure.
Baby Girl Lennon born sleeping 6-18-11 Baby Boy Anderson born healthy and happy 8-17-12
Regardless of how bumpies answer this question, you can't argue that it isn't controversial. Why saddle a human being with that burden for the rest of his life?
Also, spelling it differently doesn't change anything since it still sounds the same. If you like the sound, I suggest picking something similar like Colin or Cullen.
BFP #2 8/22/12 | EDD 5/5/13 | DS1 born 5/9/13
BFP #3 4/25/15 | EDD 1/7/16 | MMC 7/2/15 @ 13w1d | D&E 7/8/15
BFP #4 12/9/15 | EDD 8/22/16 | DS2 born 5/18/16 at 26w2d
Just keep swimming.
I know of a Cowan IRL. Ive neve thought anything of it. I'm also not Jewish, though. Honestly, if it worries you I would just change the name so you don't have to continually worry about "offending" anyone.
I actually really like how the name sounds. I like PPs suggestion of Collin if you decide to change the name.
Although my state does not have a huge Jewish population, I have always (probably since high school) associated the name Cohen as a Jewish surname. In fact, my first thought was "Jewish last name?" (Second thought was "Conan!")
And, like the previous poster said, I would not intentionally saddle my child with a name that can cause controversy.
I also pronounce Cohen differently than Cowen/Cowan. If you like the sound, I'd go with Cowen or Conan, which are, to me, pronounced differently enough to no longer be associated with Cohen. Cullen is too far of a stretch to me to want to use (and besides, I am not particularly fond of the Twilight association).
All of this!
Also, as someone who is not Jewish, who grew up in a small Texas town, even I know Cohen is a Jewish surname and that it's tied into Aaron, the Levite/priest line, and holds significance in Jewish culture. I don't know the ends and outs of it all, but I know those basics, and I would judge anyone who used that name and wasn't Jewish as ignorant. If I found out they knew the origins of the name, then I would consider their choice to use the name as odd and culturally insensitive. No, it's not offensive, it's not a slander to a religion or culture, but it's using another group's heritage for your own means.
It seems inane, harmless, but there are real repercussions. Maybe it's hard to see it with something like a name, but how about a folktale? There are lots of Native American folktales, and we love to tell these cute little stories of how the world was created. How the wolf got it's tale or something. The thing is, these aren't just stories, they're not just fiction. They are meant to be told in specific ways, by specific people, only during certain times. Some of these stories are part of medicinal treatments. They're not cute children's stories, the serious elements of a people's culture. When we people take those stories and don't attach all the other elements that are suppose to be apart of the telling of that story, then the people that retell that story, despite whatever good intentions they may have, start to warp that people's culture. I think the same thing can happen when we appropriate names that truly don't belong to us.
I love the name Asher. But back to the main subject if you like the name I would use it, though I would probably tweak the spelling like you already said. I like Coen.
I'm not Jewish, but I am saddened by the ignorance about this name being an important Jewish surname and the ambivalence about whether or not to use it. It's probably not offensive, but I think it is disrespectful. And maybe I'm just a big name nerd, but I don't understand picking a name w/o knowing it's history?
I'm not a fan of using non-family surnames as FNs. But if you must, Cohan is an Irish surname, most notably the Irish-American composer George M. Cohan. The pronunciation is different though co-HAN. Personally I'd pick something else entirely.
Exactly. Case in point: there's a baby in my daughter's baby swim class with the name Cohen. I haven't seen it written and have no idea how it's spelled-- it could be Cowan or Coen or whatever-- but I assumed it was Cohen upon hearing it, and my immediate judgment of the parents was that they were a either a) too ignorant to realize the cultural meaning behind the name, or b) too culturally insensitive to care. Do you really want to open up yourself, and your son, to that? And that's coming from a non-Jewish person-- there are a lot of people who would have much more personal, visceral reactions.
People actually name their sons after Jesus all the time, probably without even realizing it. Jesus's real name was Yeshua, which is the Hebrew translation of Joshua. Jesus is the Greek translation of Yeshua, and is a very popular name in the Hispanic community, though it's pronounced differently.
https://www.behindthename.com/name/yeshua
Anyway, I agree with the pp who said that this name is culturally insensitive and should probably be avoided. It's really sort of like when I hear about people naming their sons Ronin, which is the Japanese term for a disgraced samurai (swordsman/warrior) who is set to wander the land without even the relief of suicide and usually you had to do something pretty bad to hit ronin status.
So, yeah, I really think this name should avoided. Sorry, OP :-(
Did you not read the other replies? Speaking as a Cohen by blood, I can tell you that Cohen is most definitely not "just a name." It's a sacred heritage that holds special meaning and honor within the Jewish religion.
Yes I read the replies. I'm not trying to be rude or ignorant, it is just how I see it.
You're entitled to your opinion, of course... but just know that you're wrong. It may be the case with other surnames, but not with Cohen. It's this type of sentiment that spurred the controversy in the first place. I'm not blaming you, per se; just stating the facts.
I really don't think that the vast majority of this Country's population is admonishing every parent they come across on the playground that named their kid Cohen. I think it's not nearly as well-known of an 'issue' you may think it is, that the Cohen's of this Country will spend a lifetime explaining to every last person they meet that they are not Jewish. I asked my DH, he's a well educated history buff and he had no idea the name was either Jewish or that important. I will say he recognized it as a surname and said he would not want to use it as a first name, but other than that he was fine with it.
I don't consider myself ignorant for not knowing everything about the Jewish faith, or any other faith. I don't practice them, so I don't study them. I have better things to study in my free time, things that are important to me and not to someone else. Religion is a private, personal choice, and I will not live my life subject to someone else's or everyone else's religious rules. I believe in freedom of religion, and freedom from religion. I choose to live free from religion.
We've talked about plenty of names here, picked them apart and ridiculed them, and I'm sure most of you have not thoroughly researched every name before passing judgement to find out if there's any historical, religious, or cultural significance to it that might have influenced the parents' decision to use it. I know I don't. You may feel justified in judging us Kettles for liking it, while other parents somewhere are judging you Pots for doing the exact same thing.
If every name had to be OK'd by every religious, ethnic, cultural group in this world, then we'd all be named Baby Girl / Baby Boy LastName.
It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s that I don’t know you. Stranger Danger.
OP, I commend you for at least caring whether using the name Cohen might be offensive and asking whether it's appropriate to use or not.
However, I am disappointed with some of the replies to this thread. To me there's something wrong with saying, "I'm not a member of this minority group and I don't know any; therefore I am not concerned about respecting their culture, because their culture is irrelevant to me." But I guess I have a different understanding of what it means to live in a pluralistic society.I couldn't have said this better myself! Some of the comments are very off-putting.
Right. Pluralism, not assimilation. Your customs are yours, my customs are mine. I don't ask you to live by mine, in return I expect that you won't ask me to live by yours. It's very off-putting to me to be expected to live by someone else's beliefs and not my own.
It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s that I don’t know you. Stranger Danger.