Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Help after C-Section
I probably had an easier recovery than you did, as I was out and about within a week, so take this with a grain of salt.
I wouldn't have help that included a stranger in my home at 3 weeks. If you find you can't cope or manage, then you can always reach out then.
My 2nd c-section was so much easier than my first. I was feeling great by week 3and that could be the same for you. I wouldn't want a guest I didn't know though staying with me. You may not need the help that week anyway (for yourself) unless you need help with your other child which I understand. My DH is still taking DD to pre-school in the mornings.
Edited: I am sorry about mentioning another child to take care of. After I posted I looked at your siggy. Sorry about your loss!
No worries and thank you. It's good to hear that a second csection might be easier that the first.
Was your first an emergency c/s? There seems to be a big difference in recoveries between emergency and scheduled c/s. Both of mine have been scheduled and the recoveries have been a total breeze. Even if your recovery is a bit rougher, I don't think you'll need your niece in week 3 if the boyfriend thing will be an issue for you. (It would've been a deal breaker for me - and if you're trying to nurse, it would definitely be annoying to have a strange male in the house!) Honestly, by week 3 after having DS, I was ready to just resume some normalcy and start getting into our new routine. DH took off 3-4 days after we got home, max. My mom stayed until the 1 1/2 week point after #1 and I was absolutely fine on my own when she left (when I stopped crying, I mean!) After #2 was born, my parents stayed until she was 2 weeks, I just needed more help that time because I had a toddler who needed more activity than I felt up to providing. That wasn't as much a c/s thing as a newborn exhaustion thing, kwim? At 2 weeks out I was more than okay to handle both kids on my own.
Best of luck to you!
(read it. you know you want to.)
anderson . september 2008
vivian . february 2010
mabel . august 2012
DH-34-MFI-motility+morphology.... Me-32-Hypothyrpid+LPD
7/8/11: Clomid100mg+Ovidrel+IUI#1=BFN
8/2/11: Clomid50mg+Ovidrel+IUI#2=BFFN
8/25/11: Follistim50iu+Ovidrel+IUI#3=BFP!!!!@14dpo
Beta#1 9/8 - 251 Beta#2 9/15 - 1622 Beta#3 9/22 - 12674
1st U/S; heard one beautiful HB of 129 - 9/29/11
OB visit; HB of 166 - 10/13/11
2nd US; HB of 163 - 10/18/11
A/S - 12/9/11 - It's a perfect healthy BOY!!!!
Our miracle baby boy - born 5/24/12
I also agree that I wouldn't want a helper that came with a stranger (boyfriend or not). He may be the nicest, most helpful guy in the world...but no.
I also wanted to let you know that my 2nd and now 3rd c-section recoveries have been much easier than my 1st (which was an emergency after 2 days of labor). Like night and day different.
Good luck! It may be a good idea to have a back up plan for that 3rd week, but I agree, the boyfriend would be a deal breaker.
I just had a c-section 3 weeks ago, and I feel great. In fact we went up north to our cottage this past weekend. I stopped taking my pain meds around 9 days. I did need help the first week home as I have stairs in my house and could only do them a few times a day. The second week I was going for short walks and made sure not to overdo the stairs. At week 3 I'm walking a few miles.
IMO from my experience. Week 1 you will need help. Week 2 let your hubby stay home. I still needed help with heavy lifting and the baby of course
I don't think you will need any help by week 3, in fact you may finally want some time alone with the LO. I wouldn't have your niece and a stranger come out.