One of my good friends offered to throw a baby shower for me. She wants me to design the invitations. I'm fine with this. I make all of her invitations anyway and she will be helping. So yesterday I was making a mock-up of the invitation when I came to the RSVP part. I asked her if she wanted me to put her phone number and email or just one or the other. She said she never checks email other than her work and for obvious reasons doesn't want to give that out. Ok, that leaves her phone number, right? No, she doesn't want her phone number given out either. So then she suggests that I create a new email for SO and myself specifically for baby-related things. I just feel kind of silly doing this. As the host, I feel like she should be in charge of the RSVPs and if guests have questions they should be able to contact her. Am I wrong?
Thanks for listening and for any ideas/advice you ladies have!
Re: Baby Shower RSVP question
I don't think you are being dramatic. It kind of does sound like she is backing out maybe. I would wait a little while longer to see if she tries to make you do anymore things (such as getting the food or decor ready).
It's really rude for a host to back out of planning a shower, but if she's making you do like 30% or more of the work, I'd just tell her either to stop planning and forget it or get a co-host and stop making you do stuff. It would look bad, and it's supposed to be a gift to you.
Personally, what I would do is drop it back in her lap. RSVP's are her responsibility. You are designing and making the invites plus providing the venue free of charge and the food free of charge. What the heck is SHE doing? Don't you know her phone number? How do you contact her? Put her phone number on there. I suppose you could put "Please RSVP to (her name) at YOUR email address or you could make an email address just for RSVP's. There will still have to be a way to answer people's questions...hence her phone number. It is easy for people to just email but if they have questions they will/can call her. If she doesn't like that you've put her number on the invite then I guess she can come up with an invite of her own.
I'm thinking she doesn't really care if people RSVP or not since she is not the one that has to make sure there is enough seating and food or CARE if there is too much and it is wasted (it is not on HER dime).
Whoa! There is no difference! So don't be fine with it! If you are pretty sure your friend is backing out, then don't send out those invites! Don't let her turn you into "that guy"! Sit your friend down and be like "Hey, I'm worried that it's going to look like I'm hosting my own shower, and I totally don't want it to turn into that. What are your real thoughts on this whole thing?" Then honestly listen. If she's at all wishy-washy about wanting to do this, then tell her thanks so much for her offer, but you think you'd feel better about skipping the shower. But pretty please don't just use this all as an excuse to host your own shower.
And what about older guests? My mom doesn't have access to email. I know a lot of people who don't. What are they supposed to do?
She needs to give her phone number...she's being uber-paranoid for no reason. It's bu!!sh!t.