:( Babies Growing Up. How to get over it?

Sxia · January 2012

I'm a little bummed. My babies are getting so big! DD is in school, DS just got a new big boy bed and we have put away the crib. DH is in a big push for them to grow up. We went through all our baby clothes and gave them to my cousins/friends who are pregnant. Gave them the bjorns and stuff too.

I want to hang on to all this stuff. I also feel like, "What if we have one more?" DH is totally done, but people are always asking us, "Are you done?"

I'd like another, DH says no. And I'm sad about having my baby days over.

surprise3rd · January 2012

DH was totally done, so was I, but a little sad about....then not even a woops, my IUD failed, so there was a bigger, grander plan for us and apparently I was not done mothering a newborn, and having a baby:) It is so sad to watch them get big, in a bitter sweet type of way.

gogadget · January 2012

Please tell me IUD failure is NOT common.......what did your MD say about this??

surprise3rd · January 2012

My OB told me I was the first IUD failure she has seen. However, whenever I tell people about it failing they always respond with...my cousin got pregnant with one, or my son is an IUD baby....don't know if it is just out there more because more women are going that route so the number of the 1% is higher if that makes sense.

I believe overall it is very uncommon, and mine worked for 4.5 years, and my OB thinks it was actually inserted inproperly.

warriormomerin · January 2012

I'm really, really struggling with this right now. My DS just turned four and he's definitely my last child. I'd always envisioned one or two more, but it's just not in the cards. Four just seems so much older and less "baby" than three years-old did so it's really hit me that I won't be the parent of a newborn/infant/toddler ever again.

I try to focus on the good stuff about having older kids, like how self sufficient they are and how fun they can be. It works most of the time, but I still feel sad whenever a friend or acquaintance has another child or announces their pregnancy. I'm not sure that will ever go away entirely.

Angela814 · January 2012

I understand where you are. DH also says he's done. I'm undecided. I'm not ready to give away the baby things just yet, but I'm also not ready to TTC. As the baby days get further behind us, I'm more ready to say we're done with 2. I'm planning to hold onto some of my favorite things until I'm ready to give them away. I'm not sure what else to do.

jlw2505 · January 2012

I honestly think it is all a state of mind or at least it is for me. I had my girls in my mid to late 30's and loved it when they were little. They are now almost 4 (in March) and 5 1/2 and I am loving every second of this stage (OK, not every second as the whines can take a hike at any point). I have not been sad as we have moved out of the baby and toddler stage and are now in the preschool stage with my older DD starting kindy in the fall. I am loving it. I was thrilled when my LO told me Sat morning that she was done sleeping in pull-ups (has been daytrained for almost a year and close on night time but just not totally there yet). We shall see if she sticks with it but 2 for 2 right now. I can't wait to get the last of those things out of my house. I was that way with the crib and sippy cups too. We can do so many different and fun things as a family now and honestly, I loved the fact that my girls played with each other for 2 hours on Sat while DH and I got some stuff done around the house. They even got themselves a snack at one point. WE have taken them roller skating and are just doing a lot of fun things with them. It is just another phase in life and I am not missing the baby phase at all. I also knew I was done with my 2 kids and I cherished each moment as I went through it but have not looked back. I have a lot of friends that have gotten very sad with each stage passing and those that have cried taking their kids to preschool and such. For me, maybe since my kids have been in daycare since they were infants, I look at school as the next big adventure and am just as excited as my girls for it to begin., My SIL just had twins and I held them for about an hour yesterday - it was so nice, but it was just as nice to kiss them all good-bye, get my big kids in the car and go out and get on with our life. A co-worker, close friend is having her 3rd child in about a month - our kids are about the same age (within months) and I just look at her and think - I could not do it again. I am a few years older then her (41) so not sure if that is part of this or not. When my friends get sad, I give them hug, listen to them talk about it and then we move onto the next fun stages that we are entering.

amiamish · January 2012

cjcouple:
i think its important to embrace the stage they are in now instead of mourning what was. look for things that you can do now that they are bigger. i love that we can finally go to movie theatre of out to dinner. or mini golfing, bowling, water parks etc. ds two is finally ld enough to do these things you know?

ditto this. I love that they can go play by themselves, feed themselves... Almost done with diapers. Its fun going out as a family and doing fun things.

shopgirl78 · January 2012

cjcouple:
i think its important to embrace the stage they are in now instead of mourning what was. look for things that you can do now that they are bigger. i love that we can finally go to movie theatre of out to dinner. or mini golfing, bowling, water parks etc. ds two is finally ld enough to do these things you know?

This is where I am now--or am looking forward to being. It didn't come easy. I even flat out regretted by tubal for a short period of time (when DS1 turned 1!!). I'd def talk to your H and tell him how your feel, maybe he will slow down some on giving baby items away...

wildfloweragain · January 2012

I don't feel done, but I do feel like I can't handle more on my plate. So when I feel like I'd love a brother for DS or a newborn in the house, I just remember that I can't spread myself even thinner.

Also, I was an IUD baby:) (back in the 70's.)

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:( Babies Growing Up. How to get over it?

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