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10.5 month old nursing strike/stopping BF'ing

PeonyPumpsPeonyPumps member
in Breastfeeding

Hey Ladies,

  So I just need a bit of support from some other mamas who know where I'm at in this situation.  DS is 10.5, almost 11 months old.  He has been EBF and now that he is taking solids continues to BF well as his prior source of nutrition with starting to learn to eat foods.  Up until this weekend, the plan between my H and I was, that if I was unable to get my period by one year, I would stop nursing DS so that I could get my cycles going again to try for another baby.  I have hundreds of ounces frozen in my stash, so DS would still continue to be able to have breast milk after I wean from nursing him, but he just wouldn't be taking it from me anymore.  Well, on Christmas eve he was really fussy and did not want to nurse, which I attributed to him being overstimulated from all the family gatherings and just rocked him down to sleep instead.  On Christmas morning, he wouldn't nurse at all, which is the first time that has ever happened.  Throughout Christmas day, I ended up pumping with the 'for emergencies' hand pump I keep in my car and feeding him from a sippy cup, because we didn't have my regular pump or any bottles with us (he's never done this before and on Christmas we couldn't fine anywhere open to buy a bottle).  He ended up taking a decent amount from the sippy (around 15 ounces) throughout the day, and he did nurse once while I distracted him with toys or a video on my phone (I know that is terrible, I just wanted him to drink something so he wouldn't get dehydrated).  Today, since we've gotten home, it has been much better.  He has nursed 4 times today, and two times he even took both breasts.  He has had wet diapers and dirty diapers, so I am not concerned about dehydration anymore, and I think we are getting out of the nursing strike and back into the swing of things, although he still will bite down anytime he doesn't want to nurse, I am trying to be patient and help him to nurse as much as possible.

So here is my dilemma- after him not wanting to nurse for one whole day, if we can (which I hope we can) get back into the swing of things, I don't know if I want to stop at one year.  I really want to have another baby, and that is important to me too, but I really had a hard time with him not nursing.  As he was taking his sippy cup when he woke in the night hungry on Christmas day night, I just sat there crying because I couldn't feed him and I felt I was losing some of that closeness we have.  I know that is irrational, and that I love him and he loves me the same, but it was different.  I've only given him a bottle once in his life, and that was when I was teaching H how to give him a bottle when I started working weekends again.  It is just different than what I am used to.  H started talking to me about stopping nursing after DS started to resist nursing on Christmas as well, saying that eventually I would have to stop anyway and if he is starting to resist it, maybe now is a good time so we can have another baby.  I don't want to let him down by not getting pregnant again, which I really want too.  I guess I had just always hoped I could get pregnant while nursing and then continue to nurse DS while pregnant.  I'm just pretty emotional about it and need some words of encouragement.  Anyone go through the same thing? 

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Re: 10.5 month old nursing strike/stopping BF'ing

  • rmwt001rmwt001 member

    I can totally relate.  DH really wants me to think about weaning so that I can get AF and we can start trying for baby #2.  DD is 11 months and over the weekend she was so overstimulated there was a day she went 9 straight hours without nursing.  Besides the fact I didn't have a pump with me so the "girls" were killing, (totally going to follow your lead and buy a hand pump for the car for emergencies) I was so distraught thinking she didnt want to nurse anymore.  DH wasn't much of a help, and even said maybe she was done nursing.  By that night it was back to normal - actually she nursed 6 times in 4 hours, I thinking making up for the missed feeds.  I've known for a while that I don't want to wean in order to TTC, but I haven't flat out said that to DH (we did IUI for DD and will probably have to go that route again).  He brought it up again today and I said that at 18 months I would consider night weaning to see if that helped AF return.  I would love to get a BFP and nurse through the pregnancy if possible.  Sorry - I know this was your vent, I can just totally relate.  GL!

     

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  • MJCarp09MJCarp09 member

    Aw definitely don't give up if you are not ready too. Mylo went through something similar around 10 mos then went right back to it, as they start to wean down the frequency of their feedings you will start having your AF again, it took 3 mos after AF came back for us to get prego with #2, My LO is 18 mos, I'm 10 weeks and we're still going strong on nursing. 

    I was very scared I'd have to quit nursing to ttc because I didn't start having cycles until he was over a year old, like a week after he turned 1, then they were irregular..I did however, have a goal in mind that I was going to quit nursing and give up something special with #1 to have #2 because I felt that if #1 still needed that from me, regardless of not needing the milk, but the closeness that I wasn't really ready or well we as a family we're ready for #2.

    Really what it comes down to is what you want to do so many people say that ooh they were self weaning at this age! Typically it correlates with something else, teething, growth spurt, or developmental changes. And you'll find once they are out of that phase they will get right back to nursing and you'll have a strong nursing relationship again.

    I would try to, if you don't already take the times when you are trying to nurse and go sit in a chair away from his toys, or in your bed laying down where there aren't distractions and try to nurse in that area so he's not focused on playing and getting into everything else. 

    Lastly, here's an article that you may find helpful :)
    https://www.kellymom.com/bf/weaning/babyselfwean.html  

    Hope this helps! 

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