To snip or not to snip? what are parents choosing...

nikkalove · October 2011

I'm a FTM mommy in March to a baby boy. I went to the source circumcision.org...

Some of the info frightens me. Like to infants response to circumcision. Sad

are there any mommy's who could share their stories if they chose circumcision? Did it interfere with bonding? Did it interfere with sleep patterns? Was baby's feeding behavior shown to deteriorate? Etc..Please share your experiences...

sassafras007 · October 2011

I am letting DH decide if we do have a boy...

britglenn9 · October 2011

im a first timer too but as a nursing student i watched 3 circumcisions and i swear a couple of the babies cried more when they were wiped with the cold alcohol wipes than when they got the lidocain shots and then the metal bell thing (cant remember the name) put on there before the snip. and dipping the pacifier in the sucrose water seemed to soothe a whole lot, even though it was a little scary watching it definitely didnt make me want to not circumcise my LO, and you would think that watching it would be scary! so i do plan on circumcising my little boy due in March. hope this helps!

sunnyday016 · October 2011

We're totally undecided and we've talked about it a lot. I don't know what we're going to do.

mamalongarms · October 2011

If it's a boy we will be

JLG95 · October 2011

DH wanted our son circumcised, so he was circumcised when he was about 2 -3 days old.

The day of the procedure he was extra cranky for a few hours, so we nursed and snuggled a bunch that day. That's it. He was fine otherwise.

AliW220 · October 2011

I'm a FTM, so I can't give stories as to how it affects bonding,etc.

I was a nurse's aide at a nursing home, and I can tell you I've seen the cleanliness side of the argument over and over again. Fresh out of class & shy aides often don't realize how icky it can get if the foreskin isn't pulled back and cleaned, even if the resident didn't have incontinence issues. It broke my heart to have to fight dementia patients who thought I was trying to do sexually-inappropriate things to them, when all I was doing was cleaning their private parts. I've also seen cases of foreskin not being able to be pulled back, which leads to infections and lots of pain. The few minutes of a crying baby is worth it to me when I think about my child possibly having to be that old man in the nursing home who is traumatized twice a day when he needs to be bathed.

DrBeepersWife · October 2011

We are snipping.

ZoeyMarie · October 2011

Yes, we circumcised G. He didn't have a sleep pattern at that time as he was about 24 hours old, so no interference there. Again, with the feeding: We were just starting a schedule so, nope, no issues there. And I can guarantee there hasn't been an issue in bonding with Mommy/Daddy. We get hugs, kisses, and cuddles galore!

Do your research from MULTIPLE sources. Some are going to be very obviously skewed one way or another, but educate yourself. Then you and your H need to sit down and make a decision.

Personally, DH & I did some reading on the topic, and then I let him decide. It wasn't worth the potential, albeit slim, risk that G might have to have the procedure later when he would remember everything to not have it done at his birth.

Keri Marie · October 2011

DH is in charge of that decision. I'm supporting it either way.

katcarls · October 2011

We chose not to because IMO, the slim benefits don't outweigh the potential risks. More and more people are choosing not to, over 50% in a lot of areas, so your LO wouldn't be the odd one out if you chose not to. I think it's something you should discuss with your pedi.

smacb · October 2011

We circumsized DS. I left the final decision up to DH. He is and wanted DS to be. I read a lot on the topic. For every con I saw a pro--decreased risk of STD's and infections, etc. It's a quick and easy procedure. It took about 2 minutes in the hospital.

sandy02 · October 2011

We did with both boys and experienced none of the issues you described. DH went with them both to have it done and he said they didnt even cry. (They had the plastibell procedure) The only part they didnt like was being held down for it.

barnwife · October 2011

katcarls:
We chose not to because IMO, the slim benefits don't outweigh the potential risks. More and more people are choosing not to, over 50% in a lot of areas, so your LO wouldn't be the odd one out if you chose not to. I think it's something you should discuss with your pedi.

This is us too. After doing research from multiple sources on both sides (pro and anti circ) we also decided not to. Plus, DH didn't want to.

Yes, we will need to teach him how to clean his penis. I don't see this as a big deal though. It's just another of the good hygiene habits we are teaching.

funkymonkeyohyeahhh · October 2011

jesse1117:
We're snipping. I know it's creepy, but I've heard horror stories about men developing complications and having to have it done later. Talk about traumatic!
Plus, if you don't snip, it looks like it has on a hooded sweatshirt :P

Confused Are you 12?

elektra1835 · October 2011

ZoeyMarie:
Do your research from MULTIPLE sources. Some are going to be very obviously skewed one way or another, but educate yourself. Then you and your H need to sit down and make a decision.
Personally, DH & I did some reading on the topic, and then I let him decide. It wasn't worth the potential, albeit slim, risk that G might have to have the procedure later when he would remember everything to not have it done at his birth.

This. We are FTPs, but when our baby boy is born he will have it done. What a PP wrote about her nursing home experience is just heartbreaking and I would hate for that to be my child regardless of how slim the risk of complications is. GL to you guys, I know it's a difficult decision. No one wants to think about their little baby in pain.

elektra1835 · October 2011

ZoeyMarie:
Do your research from MULTIPLE sources. Some are going to be very obviously skewed one way or another, but educate yourself. Then you and your H need to sit down and make a decision.
Personally, DH & I did some reading on the topic, and then I let him decide. It wasn't worth the potential, albeit slim, risk that G might have to have the procedure later when he would remember everything to not have it done at his birth.

This. We are FTPs, but when our baby boy is born he will have it done. What a PP wrote about her nursing home experience is just heartbreaking and I would hate for that to be my child regardless of how slim the risk of complications is. GL to you guys, I know it's a difficult decision. No one wants to think about their little baby in pain.

Pdxmom73 · October 2011

I have 2 boys, both got snipped before leaving the hospital. My nephew was a premmie and could not have it done right away. My brother and wife then put it off for a long time. Finally, at 5 yo when he had some issues, they got it done. Poor little dude hurt so bad. So, I say at birth or never!!!

jsillyfun · October 2011

We are not doing it. DH prefers to, but I said no way and he is willing not to since it is so important to me.

skibunny59 · October 2011

I'm a FTM also due in March! We find out tomorrow if it's a girl or boy. We are choosing not to circumcise. I think it's a very personal decision and I don't think it makes anyone a good or bad parent just because they choose one way or the other. My nephews are both circumcised and they didn't have any of the issues you mentioned.

cpanders · October 2011

We decided to do it. My IL's are muslim so DH wasn't snipped until he was 13 or so per their tradition. I figured if something happened to us and my SIL raised LO or he chose to become muslim (or jewish for that matter) later in life it's best if he already had it done.

bamfs · October 2011

We had our son circumcised and will this time too... I know there are people that are REALLY against it, but we had several personal reasons to do it... the doctor said the babies cry more about having their arms held down than the actual snip... after it was done, our son was completely normal.. there were no after-care things we really needed to do besides keeping it clean. After a little while it was all healed up and he's the best little guy ever! I'm not going to say it wasn't hard... I cried thinking about my son in pain, but after it was all done, it was fine!

lindy27 · October 2011

We will if we have a boy. I left the decision up to my husband and he was 100% yes. Not sure all the reasons but I know he is glad he was.

kcanuck · October 2011

DH and my stepson are not, so newbie will not be either! Both of us think it is not necessary. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, however.

FroggyFarts · October 2011

nikkalove:
are there any mommy's who could share their stories if they chose circumcision? Our son had a circumcision in his first week of life. We did it in our pedi's office with a pedi who had performed thousands of them in his career. Our son didn't cry at all during the procedure. It only took a few minutes and dad was right there with him the whole time.

A small breakdown: We were put into a private, sterile heated room. We stripped baby down on his bottom half. They placed him in the tray to avoid squirming (he slept through most of the procedure). Doctor had dad dip his fingertip in sugar and let baby suckle it while he gave him a topical pain killer followed by a local injection for pain relief in the whole area. No squirming, crying or upset reaction to the shot since the area was numbed beforehand. Doctor placed the bell on and with the bell's design didn't even have to use a scalpel. The bell has a cord that wraps around to secure to cut. It was clean. There were no tears. He looked it over to make sure it looked good, re-clothed and we were done.

Did it interfere with bonding? Not in my opinion. He is a very confident, loving little guy now (nearly four years old). We've never had an insecure or unhealthy attachment.

Did it interfere with sleep patterns? Not at all. He slept just the same as pre-circ for us.

Was baby's feeding behavior shown to deteriorate? Nope. He ate just as often as before and for just as long.
Notes: Our pedi did a local pain killer before the snip. He also didn't free-hand the circ itself. He used the bell for it, which served as a cutting guide and also will fall off naturally after a few days (but prevents urine or fecal matter from touching the cut while it heals = no infection).

We were told to give him baby doses of tylenol if he acted like he had any discomfort (he didn't -- slept/ate/snuggled just fine after the initial pain killer wore off). If there was any swelling or look of infection, we could put neosporin on it or take him in to be checked on. He didn't have those problems either.

I would suggest you read information for both sides thoroughly and from multiple sources to try and avoid biased information. Make sure the choice is a good fit for your family. Don't allow others to influence your decision. Do your research as far as physicians in choosing a doctor to perform it if you decide to move forward.

There are horror cases of facilities that don't use pain killer for baby. I wouldn't use one. There are horror cases of doctors who over-snip. I wouldn't use a doctor who had "accidents" during the procedure. You can also research the various methods for circumcision. If we were to circ again, we would make sure they use the bell again. It makes care immediately following very easy and reduces chances for an accident.

mrs+harlow · October 2011

If we have a boy we will be circumcising.

I dated two guys who were uncircumcised and both had what I would call psychological issues due to it. One was worse off than the other and both said they wished their parents had not made that decision. One had it done later in life and it was fairly traumatizing so....we will be doing it as a baby.

Melzig76 · October 2011

DS is. The worst part was hearing him cry, I refused to go in the room with them (he and my EXH) The healing process was quick and had no complications. I would rec. putting a lot of vasaline on his little penis, that way it doesn't stick to the diaper. I think I remember doing this longer than they told me to.

gekeler6 · October 2011

We will circumcise. Its normal in both our families. DH is very strongly for it and to me I agree. All the boys in my family that have been have been fine, my nephew slept through his. If your going to do it, its best to do it sooner than later.

flutterbies818 · October 2011

I'm a FTM, but we definitely are. DH has almost every male on both sides of his family have to have it done as an adult because of health problems. I would much rather do it when DS is a couple days old, than when he is in his 20's.

mommybrynn · October 2011

We are. It's a personal choice, no major religious or medical reasons, just what we decided was best for our little boy!

Divallyn · October 2011

We will not have it done. Most people in my area are choosing to not get it done.

My H researched and decided against it after everything he learned. It's considered a cosmetic procedure here and to me that says it all.

I dated men who were uncircumcised and they didn't have any "issues" with it.

CalMum_Momma · October 2011

DS is circ'd. It was nbd. They took him for 10min for the procedure, during which he did not even cry. He was uncomfortable only the first two times he urinated after the procedure and then again for about an hour two weeks later before the plastic ring fell off. It did not in any way shape or form interfere with bonding or sleep patterns, and he had no deterioration in feeding behavior. He had my milk in in less than 48 hours. If this one was a boy it would also be circ'd.

SGreen0985 · October 2011

We're FTP as well. And won't find out the sex for a few more weeks. DH is not circumcised and is against circumcision. He doesn't believe it's natural. He also thinks the risks by far outweigh the benefits. I'm pro-circumcision, for aesthetic and sanitary reasons. I'm hoping for a girl so we don't have to come to an agreement. :-)

Oh and I highly doubt being circumcised or not has much to do with your mental status, unlike what pp said. Crazy!

CalMum_Momma · October 2011

Melzig76:
DS is. The worst part was hearing him cry, I refused to go in the room with them (he and my EXH) The healing process was quick and had no complications. I would rec. putting a lot of vasaline on his little penis, that way it doesn't stick to the diaper. I think I remember doing this longer than they told me to.

Please don't do this automatically if you do decide to circ. This was not at all necessary with the type of procedure used for DS's circ. In fact there was no aftercare at all other than to leave it alone! Do what the doctors recommend based on the procedure they use.

mbear511 · October 2011

DS was not circumcised, I left it up to my husband to make that decision. If this baby is a boy, we will not circumcise again.

Both of my nephews were circumcised and they both were champion eaters, bonded well with Mom and didn't seem to have any bad reactions to the procedure.

lrichmond86 · October 2011

We definitely are. Hubby has a friend who had to have it done in his 20's because of repeated infections at the recovery was horrific. To me, the sooner the better!

mrs+harlow · October 2011

gsteph88:
mrs+harlow:
If we have a boy we will be circumcising.
I dated two guys who were uncircumcised and both had what I would call psychological issues due to it. One was worse off than the other and both said they wished their parents had not made that decision. One had it done later in life and it was fairly traumatizing so....we will be doing it as a baby.
I'm totally side-eyeing you right now.
I've dated a few guys, and I've talked to a bunch of my guy friends (yeah, we have penis talks...:P) and all of them that weren't circumcised had absolutely no issues with it. So I think those boyfriends would have had psychological issues regardless of foreskin or not.
We decided to not get DS circumcised because like another PP said, it's considered cosmetic here, and that's enough proof to me that isn't necessary. Also, DH isn't and none of the guys in his family are, and they are all fine, never have had any problem with it so it's no big deal to us.

You can" side eye" me all you want.

Are you in Canada like the other poster?Aren't circumcision rates in our two countries vastly different? Perhaps that explains most of it - especially when you say they would have had psych issues regardless...no actually the issues were fairly specific to the penis and prevalence of circumcision in America ( at least for my generation ...who knows maybe it is changing now).

One was made fun of by the guys in the locker room and it spread through the school. We all know how that goes during adolescence. It left enough of a scar to mention it years later and say he wished his parents had made a different decision. So no he didn't have psychological issues regardless...it was fairly specific.

The other was one of my closest guy friends EVER and lost him earlier this year in a car accident so nope wouldn't ever fib about hat. He was circumcised in his 20's for not only aesthetics but also comfort due to a tight foreskin. Had delayed relationship development with females due to the insecurity over him being uncircumcised and not wanting any one to find out. So yea while other things happened in his life this was also a contributing factor to insecurity in his life, as well.

JNoelleE · November 2011

mrs+harlow:
gsteph88:
mrs+harlow:
If we have a boy we will be circumcising.
I dated two guys who were uncircumcised and both had what I would call psychological issues due to it. One was worse off than the other and both said they wished their parents had not made that decision. One had it done later in life and it was fairly traumatizing so....we will be doing it as a baby.
I'm totally side-eyeing you right now.
I've dated a few guys, and I've talked to a bunch of my guy friends (yeah, we have penis talks...:P) and all of them that weren't circumcised had absolutely no issues with it. So I think those boyfriends would have had psychological issues regardless of foreskin or not.
We decided to not get DS circumcised because like another PP said, it's considered cosmetic here, and that's enough proof to me that isn't necessary. Also, DH isn't and none of the guys in his family are, and they are all fine, never have had any problem with it so it's no big deal to us.
You can" side eye" me all you want.
Are you in Canada like the other poster?Aren't circumcision rates in our two countries vastly different? Perhaps that explains most of it - especially when you say they would have had psych issues regardless...no actually the issues were fairly specific to the penis and prevalence of circumcision in America ( at least for my generation ...who knows maybe it is changing now).
One was made fun of by the guys in the locker room and it spread through the school. We all know how that goes during adolescence. It left enough of a scar to mention it years later and say he wished his parents had made a different decision. So no he didn't have psychological issues regardless...it was fairly specific.
The other was one of my closest guy friends EVER and lost him earlier this year in a car accident so nope wouldn't ever fib about hat. He was circumcised in his 20's for not only aesthetics but also comfort due to a tight foreskin. Had delayed relationship development with females due to the insecurity over him being uncircumcised and not wanting any one to find out. So yea while other things happened in his life this was also a contributing factor to insecurity in his life, as well.

I live in California, in the United States, and I'm giving you the side eye too... I have dated men who had not had it done and they did not have psychological problems because of it. My brother also didn't have it done and he doesn't care. (I only know that because I asked my mom what circumcision meant when I was little and she told me and said how she didn't want to do that to my brother.) Just cause your two friends were so traumatized by it, doesn't mean the majority of other males who do not have it done, will be. If I have a boy I wont do it. Weird huh, given that I don't live in Canada... A lot of my friends feel the same way I do, so I'm pretty sure its not just a Canadian thing.

sunnyday016 · November 2011

JNoelleE:
mrs+harlow:
gsteph88:
mrs+harlow:
If we have a boy we will be circumcising.
I dated two guys who were uncircumcised and both had what I would call psychological issues due to it. One was worse off than the other and both said they wished their parents had not made that decision. One had it done later in life and it was fairly traumatizing so....we will be doing it as a baby.
I'm totally side-eyeing you right now.
I've dated a few guys, and I've talked to a bunch of my guy friends (yeah, we have penis talks...:P) and all of them that weren't circumcised had absolutely no issues with it. So I think those boyfriends would have had psychological issues regardless of foreskin or not.
We decided to not get DS circumcised because like another PP said, it's considered cosmetic here, and that's enough proof to me that isn't necessary. Also, DH isn't and none of the guys in his family are, and they are all fine, never have had any problem with it so it's no big deal to us.
You can" side eye" me all you want.
Are you in Canada like the other poster?Aren't circumcision rates in our two countries vastly different? Perhaps that explains most of it - especially when you say they would have had psych issues regardless...no actually the issues were fairly specific to the penis and prevalence of circumcision in America ( at least for my generation ...who knows maybe it is changing now).
One was made fun of by the guys in the locker room and it spread through the school. We all know how that goes during adolescence. It left enough of a scar to mention it years later and say he wished his parents had made a different decision. So no he didn't have psychological issues regardless...it was fairly specific.
The other was one of my closest guy friends EVER and lost him earlier this year in a car accident so nope wouldn't ever fib about hat. He was circumcised in his 20's for not only aesthetics but also comfort due to a tight foreskin. Had delayed relationship development with females due to the insecurity over him being uncircumcised and not wanting any one to find out. So yea while other things happened in his life this was also a contributing factor to insecurity in his life, as well.

I live in California, in the United States, and I'm giving you the side eye too... I have dated men who had not had it done and they did not have psychological problems because of it. My brother also didn't have it done and he doesn't care. (I only know that because I asked my mom what circumcision meant when I was little and she told me and said how she didn't want to do that to my brother.) Just cause your two friends were so traumatized by it, doesn't mean the majority of other males who do not have it done, will be. If I have a boy I wont do it. Weird huh, given that I don't live in Canada... A lot of my friends feel the same way I do, so I'm pretty sure its not just a Canadian thing.

You're just trading anecdotes here. Some people know people who had bad experiences with being left intact. Some people know people who had bad experiences being circed. Some people know people who had good experiences either way. That doesn't make anyone right or wrong...

BMerry09 · November 2011

FTM here too, expecting a baby boy in feb... I am choosing to have him "snipped".

I feel its better to do it, easier to keep the penis clean, and less risks of infections.. after working as a CNA for many years, and dealing with men who are and men who are not... in the long run health wise i think even if it does mess up sleep patterns etc its worth it.. plus at 1-3 days of age do they really have a sleep pattern?

Mjmksb04 · November 2011

My DS was circumsized. I was on the fence, but my H wanted it so we did it. No problems bonding, no issues sleeping except the usual newborn stuff. I think its kind of bizarre that you make that leap that there could be those issues Tongue Tied

My DS is a healthy and happy almost 3 year old.

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