Can I talk about my anal beads again?

MrsNiner · September 2011

The other night we were using them in the living room because DS was asleep in our's. When we were done, neither one of us could find them. We are having company this weekend. Who wants to bet H's grandma finds them before we do?

JJsMom211 · September 2011

I am never coming to your house if invited. Who knows what kind of kinky shiit you've done on your kitchen table.

RosieBcheeks98 · September 2011

LOL it's like that movie "Maid of Honor" when the grandma wears them as a neaklace.. and says they glow in the dark!

Titts McGeee · September 2011

Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?

JJsMom211 · September 2011

Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?

Oh, I'm dead right now.

Titts McGeee · September 2011

cruelsound:
Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?
Like those chicks who have really itchy, stinky vaginas and then realize they have a fossilized tampon wedged up there?

Is that what's causing my femodor?

MrsNiner · September 2011

Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?

No, because the other night it was H's turn for the anal play. Embarrassed

MrsNiner · September 2011

JJsMom211:
I am never coming to your house if invited. Who knows what kind of kinky shiit you've done on your kitchen table.

Kitchen table = lots of cribbage... and sex 9 months pregnant. I bet that was a site. Stay away from my bathroom counter too.

RosieBcheeks98 · September 2011

RandomPickle:
Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?
No, because the other night it was H's turn for the anal play.

WAIT, let me get this right...H let you stick those up his ass?

MrsNiner · September 2011

BrittDay03:

RandomPickle:
Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?
No, because the other night it was H's turn for the anal play.

WAIT, let me get this right...H let you stick those up his ass?

You're correct. He was drunk one night and asked me to. Come to find out, he kind of liked it. I blow him while doing it. But that was more than you wanted to know.

JJsMom211 · September 2011

I am leaving this thread and never coming back.

PenDun · September 2011

BrittDay03:

RandomPickle:
Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?
No, because the other night it was H's turn for the anal play.

WAIT, let me get this right...H let you stick those up his ass?

Hahaha! I think we're still talking about HER butt. No anal beads this time though. Maybe. Am I right?

ETA: Turns out I'm WAY wrong. I'll just leave now.

RosieBcheeks98 · September 2011

RandomPickle:
BrittDay03:

RandomPickle:
Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?
No, because the other night it was H's turn for the anal play.

WAIT, let me get this right...H let you stick those up his ass?

You're correct. He was drunk one night and asked me to. Come to find out, he kind of liked it. I blow him while doing it. But that was more than you wanted to know.

LOL I love it. You can't get near DH ass with a 10 foot pole.

JJsMom211 · September 2011

BrittDay03:
RandomPickle:
BrittDay03:

RandomPickle:
Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?
No, because the other night it was H's turn for the anal play.

WAIT, let me get this right...H let you stick those up his ass?

You're correct. He was drunk one night and asked me to. Come to find out, he kind of liked it. I blow him while doing it. But that was more than you wanted to know.

LOL I love it. You can't get near DH ass with a 10 foot pole.

You've never tried prostate play? You'd be surprised how quickly the happy ending will come.

Ok, I'm leaving. For real this time.

MrsNiner · September 2011

JJsMom211:
BrittDay03:
RandomPickle:
BrittDay03:

RandomPickle:
Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?
No, because the other night it was H's turn for the anal play.

WAIT, let me get this right...H let you stick those up his ass?

You're correct. He was drunk one night and asked me to. Come to find out, he kind of liked it. I blow him while doing it. But that was more than you wanted to know.

LOL I love it. You can't get near DH ass with a 10 foot pole.

You've never tried prostate play? You'd be surprised how quickly the happy ending will come.

Ok, I'm leaving. For real this time.

We all know your dirty secrets. And all about your sex addicted H.

MrsNiner · September 2011

JJsMom211:
BrittDay03:
RandomPickle:
BrittDay03:

RandomPickle:
Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?
No, because the other night it was H's turn for the anal play.

WAIT, let me get this right...H let you stick those up his ass?

You're correct. He was drunk one night and asked me to. Come to find out, he kind of liked it. I blow him while doing it. But that was more than you wanted to know.

LOL I love it. You can't get near DH ass with a 10 foot pole.

You've never tried prostate play? You'd be surprised how quickly the happy ending will come.

Ok, I'm leaving. For real this time.

We all know your dirty secrets. And about your sex addicted H.

RosieBcheeks98 · September 2011

JJsMom211:
BrittDay03:
RandomPickle:
BrittDay03:

RandomPickle:
Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?
No, because the other night it was H's turn for the anal play.

WAIT, let me get this right...H let you stick those up his ass?

You're correct. He was drunk one night and asked me to. Come to find out, he kind of liked it. I blow him while doing it. But that was more than you wanted to know.

LOL I love it. You can't get near DH ass with a 10 foot pole.

You've never tried prostate play? You'd be surprised how quickly the happy ending will come.

Ok, I'm leaving. For real this time.

I really try to tell him he would like it, but nope...he freaks the fvck out if I get close.

HenHen25 · September 2011

This thread is killing me! You have the sex life my DH wishes we had!

JJsMom211 · September 2011

RandomPickle:
JJsMom211:
BrittDay03:
RandomPickle:
BrittDay03:

RandomPickle:
Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?
No, because the other night it was H's turn for the anal play.

WAIT, let me get this right...H let you stick those up his ass?

You're correct. He was drunk one night and asked me to. Come to find out, he kind of liked it. I blow him while doing it. But that was more than you wanted to know.

LOL I love it. You can't get near DH ass with a 10 foot pole.

You've never tried prostate play? You'd be surprised how quickly the happy ending will come.

Ok, I'm leaving. For real this time.

We all know your dirty secrets. And about your sex addicted H.

I tried, I can't stay away from this thread.

And yes, we talked about it last night. He'll be checking himself in to rehab. Apparently it's called addiction when a 26 yr old man wants to bone his wife on the daily. Who knew?

MrsNiner · September 2011

H used to get freaked out if I went anywhere near it. But all it took was half a bottle of Svedka one night and we were both bombed. He was getting the toys out, and was all giddy asking if I'd do it to him that night. Now it's "normal" I guess.

misskristina21 · September 2011

While we are on the subject of anal.. I told DH that he could do it to me if I could shove something the same size of him up his @ss. He told me sure.. and he was dead serious.

Now, what do I pick to shove up his @ss? Any ideas besides anal beads?

GreenFlamingo7 · September 2011

misskristina21:

While we are on the subject of anal.. I told DH that he could do it to me if I could shove something the same size of him up his @ss. He told me sure.. and he was dead serious.

Now, what do I pick to shove up his @ss? Any ideas besides anal beads?

Depends on his size. Are you married to a gnome or a donkey? Or something in between? Maybe just peruse the cucumbers at the store and pick one that's similar.

TobleroneBar · September 2011

misskristina21:

While we are on the subject of anal.. I told DH that he could do it to me if I could shove something the same size of him up his @ss. He told me sure.. and he was dead serious.

Now, what do I pick to shove up his @ss? Any ideas besides anal beads?

strap on...I've always wanted to get a good strap on for DH....

Pickle, damn girl you are one dirty betch... remind me never to eat the cucumber salad at your place.

misskristina21 · September 2011

DeadOktober:
misskristina21:

While we are on the subject of anal.. I told DH that he could do it to me if I could shove something the same size of him up his @ss. He told me sure.. and he was dead serious.

Now, what do I pick to shove up his @ss? Any ideas besides anal beads?

strap on...I've always wanted to get a good strap on for DH....

Pickle, damn girl you are one dirty betch... remind me never to eat the cucumber salad at your place.

Hm. A strap on sounds ok. Not a cucumber though..I wouldn't want a veggie shoved up any of my holes, so I should probably be nice and not shove any up his.

citychicks · September 2011

RandomPickle:
BrittDay03:

RandomPickle:
Titts McGeee:
Are you sure theyre not stuck in your butt?
No, because the other night it was H's turn for the anal play.

WAIT, let me get this right...H let you stick those up his ass?

You're correct. He was drunk one night and asked me to. Come to find out, he kind of liked it. I blow him while doing it. But that was more than you wanted to know.

Ummmm, can you say understatement? Surprise Indifferent Ick!

PeonyPumps · September 2011

Not that we do that... um... stuff.... because I'm not quite into that, but is it sad that the most offensive part of this thread to me is that you use the same pair? For hygenic reasons, I'd be freaked out to use anything that went up anyone else's bottom, even if it was my H's bottom. How do you clean that? I'd be freaked out we'd be passing c-dif or something scary around, lol.

Doodle2011 · September 2011

DeadOktober:
misskristina21:

While we are on the subject of anal.. I told DH that he could do it to me if I could shove something the same size of him up his @ss. He told me sure.. and he was dead serious.

Now, what do I pick to shove up his @ss? Any ideas besides anal beads?

strap on...I've always wanted to get a good strap on for DH....

Pickle, damn girl you are one dirty betch... remind me never to eat the cucumber salad at your place.

*dies*

Titts McGeee · September 2011

PeonyPumps:
Not that we do that... um... stuff.... because I'm not quite into that, but is it sad that the most offensive part of this thread to me is that you use the same pair? For hygenic reasons, I'd be freaked out to use anything that went up anyone else's bottom, even if it was my H's bottom. How do you clean that? I'd be freaked out we'd be passing c-dif or something scary around, lol.

I thought this too.

NewFamily09 · September 2011

GreenFlamingo7:
misskristina21:

While we are on the subject of anal.. I told DH that he could do it to me if I could shove something the same size of him up his @ss. He told me sure.. and he was dead serious.

Now, what do I pick to shove up his @ss? Any ideas besides anal beads?

Depends on his size. Are you married to a gnome or a donkey? Or something in between? Maybe just peruse the cucumbers at the store and pick one that's similar.

I saw a show once called 1000 Ways to Die and one of them was this sick chick who did that with a carrot. I forget what went wrong, but she died somehow.