How to come to terms with an RCS?

YaraC

I am 10 days away from my 41 week deadline and while that is plenty of time for something to happen, given my past pregnancy (41w5d after 4 days of induction attempts) there is a very good chance that I will wake up on the 13th just as pregnant as I am today.

That means there is a good chance I will end up with a RCS, not because me or my baby is in danger but because I reached some arbitrary deadline that has nothing to do with my personal situation. It is just "hospital policy".

As you can tell, I'm angry about the situation. I need to find a way to come to terms with the possibility of the surgery before it happens so that I can make it as enjoyable experience as possible. Is anyone else going/gone through this and what has helped you accept the situation?

The worst part is that at my hospital they won't let you have your baby in recovery. Has anyone been able to negotiate hospital policies like that? Having my baby taken away immediately for who knows how long is the absolute worst part and I think if it weren't for that I would have an easier time coming around. 

I still have hope that I'll go into labor but I need to prepare myself for the alternative. 

cchill01

Don't give up hope!!  And get busy trying!!  For me, part of RCS acceptance will be knowing that I did everything I could to have my VBAC.  With my first, I just sat there and waited to go into labor.  With this one, I will pull out all the stops - accupuncture, walking, sex, spicy foods, pineapple, bouncing on a ball and maybe even castor oil (if the doctor oks it).

If your biggest concern is recovery without the baby, then I would definitely speak with your provider about creating a nicer cs experience.  DD was with me for most of my recovery - after I was stitched up.  I got to try to breastfeed and hold her for a while.  I was actually glad when they took her to the nursery, because I was so groggy.

Then you always have the option of not showing up for the RCS at 41weeks.  If you show up at a hospital in labor, they can't turn you away.  This is a really tough decision though and I'm not sure I could make it myself. 

YaraC

Oh, I'm definitely not giving up hope yet. Just trying to get to a place where if I do have to have an RCS, I'm not so angry about it. I am giving the OWTs a try to a point. No castor oil and no blue cohosh for me. To be honest, I did it all last time to but to no avail. Can't hurt to try.

Being separated from my baby is a big factor for me though certainly not the only one. It is, however, one that can be changed, whereas recovery time and being able to care for my DD are going to be affected by a c-section and that is just the way it is. 

I just don't think I would be comfortable with the whole not showing up and waiting until I am in labor thing. Mainly because I wouldn't have my husband's support in doing such a thing. I will certainly be trying to negotiate extra days though. Luckily, my OB hasn't even tried to get me to go ahead and schedule an RCS date so I can always hope the hospital will be to full to accomodate me at 41 weeks. 

 

Thanks!

hopecounts

((hugs)) 

No advice on coming to terms with a RCS, I can't imagine being sepetated from my baby. At my hospital mom and baby stay together after a CS. 

Hopefully you won't get to that point but if you do talk to your Dr. and see if something can be worked out. Worst that happens is they won't and you'll be no worse off.

I found this the other day, it's worth a shot if you want to try it.

 https://www.milescircuit.com/index.html

If you've made some progress would your Dr. Be willing to give it a little more time? 

surprise3rd

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5RIcaK98Yg

This is a link to a The Natural Ceasarean: A Women Centered Technique....I believe it was created outside the US, which could possibly prohibit some of the things they do, but I enjoyed watching it as I have to have a 3rd repeat C-Section and really want to do it a little differently this time.  I am also pasting a birth plan for a c-section here.  I actually copied this off of another post on here.  I have yet to discuss a lot of this with my own OB, but plan to.  Having had 2 c-sections the thing I feel like I miss out on the most is that immediate placement of the baby on my chest.  That skin to skin contact is the piece I feel totally pissed about missing.

• Leave my arms unstrapped
• Allow husband to stay with me during c-section prep
• Insert catheter after I am numb
• Anti-nausea meds right away
• Would like still photos allowed of baby
• Would like to wear glasses/contacts during surgery or put glasses on to see baby being born
• Please bring baby to me right away to see/hold
• Husband to announce the sex of the baby
• Please leave cord long for husband to cut
• Dermabond for skin closure
• Baby to stay with us at all times in the OR and recovery unless there is a medical problem
• I would like to hold baby on the way to the recovery room
• I would like to breastfeed within the first hour after birth
  ECG dots away from front of the chest
• Please help me make this birth a special and positive experience

Given all this,  I would still do everything I could to get labor started.  All the old tricks.  Good Luck.

lostaspen

In the book, Birthing From Within, the author talks about how the birth of a baby is also the birth of a mother, and in many/most cases, a c/s really messes this up for the mother.  It resonated with me, I guess I just felt so detached from the "birthing" experience.  It took months for me to "birth" into a mom, and sometimes I still feel like I missed something.  The author (a VBAC mama) recomends having everyone involved in c/s (doctors, nurses, tech, dad, family, etc) to call it a Cesarean Birth.  If you can get your hands on the book (I got it through the library), you might flip through it.  

Lots of labor dust to you, I hope you go into labor naturally!  HUGS! 

ABMcKinney

I had a repeat c/s with my 2nd baby. I didn't want to, and at the time I honestly didn't believe that I would mentally be able to handle it. Boy was I wrong! When my OB told me that she didn't believe a VBAC was going to work for me (at my 38 week appointment) I was devestated. In hindsight I probably should have argued with her- she would have let me try, she just didn't recommend it. I'm glad I didn't. I had a wonderful repeat c/s and I wouldn't trade the experience for anything. Take charge of your c-section! The best part about scheduling these things is that you have so much more control.