Hiya newbies!! Some advice from an old reg

abeaverhausen2 · July 2011

sheilatakesabow:
brookelynpaisley:
KeepinItReal135:

written by someone who is clearly bitter. responded to by others who are clearly bitter.
Newbies: when you get to the 1st tri or your month board it's not like this. rest assured these b*tches will probably still be on this board attempting to be the ttgp police when you move on.
I am not bitter, but thank you for your concern.
And yes, I will probably still be here, unfortunately. I have no desire to be the TTGP police if/when I move on, but for now I am here to dole out some advice to newbs that don't like the way things are done here.
Let me guess... kiwifuzz?
I am admittedly full of AE conspiracy theories, most of which I've been trying to keep to myself, but I was wondering this as well.

I've suspected this too.

LegallyBlonde217 · July 2011

BP for President!!

annabelleev · July 2011

KeepinItReal135:
written by someone who is clearly bitter. responded to by others who are clearly bitter.

Newbies: when you get to the 1st tri or your month board it's not like this. rest assured these b*tches will probably still be on this board attempting to be the ttgp police when you move on.

I'm a newbie who was given a lot of helpful advice and set straight at times when I was totally clueless. I'd say that calling the women here b*tches while saying they're bitter and will still be trying long after you and other newbies get your BFPs is more than hypocritical.

Piggilywiggily · July 2011

brookelynpaisley:
Posted (with edits) per the request and support of some fabulous ladies:
I'm giving you your official warning. If you don't like it here, leave. No one is forcing you to stay. It is not snark or harsh, it is fact. No one said "The Bump is the only pregnancy forum site, and if you don't like it, you have to change it to be what you want." We like our ways. There are MANY sites that could be a fit for you. Go fvcking find one. Go do your Shettles and get your "ovulation" tickers. Go tell everyone that midcycle spotting is due to implantation and 29+ day cycles are "long." Go make your own happy place. But don't do it here. This isn't that type of board. We promote knowing your body, the facts, and the chances. We will educate you if you will listen, and if you resist, that if your choice, and your choice alone.
Also, Google is your friend. As is the newbie link at the top of this board.
Good day.

Bitter

mepclu · July 2011

Piggilywiggily:

Bitter

How original.

SParkman80 · July 2011

KeepinItReal135:
written by someone who is clearly bitter. responded to by others who are clearly bitter.

Newbies: when you get to the 1st tri or your month board it's not like this. rest assured these b*tches will probably still be on this board attempting to be the ttgp police when you move on.

misstrish521 · July 2011

clapping

I think I love you BP.

KatOT13 · July 2011

brookelynpaisley:
Posted (with edits) per the request and support of some fabulous ladies:

I'm giving you your official warning. If you don't like it here, leave. No one is forcing you to stay. It is not snark or harsh, it is fact. No one said "The Bump is the only pregnancy forum site, and if you don't like it, you have to change it to be what you want." We like our ways. There are MANY sites that could be a fit for you. Go fvcking find one. Go do your Shettles and get your "ovulation" tickers. Go tell everyone that midcycle spotting is due to implantation and 29+ day cycles are "long." Go make your own happy place. But don't do it here. This isn't that type of board. We promote knowing your body, the facts, and the chances. We will educate you if you will listen, and if you resist, that if your choice, and your choice alone.

Also, Google is your friend. As is the newbie link at the top of this board.

Good day.

Well put OP!

NovOwl · July 2011

exactly.

ClaireOtoms · July 2011

salt78:
::lurks in:: I'm giving you a standing ovation right now. ::lurks out::

Definitely just read that as "standing ovulation" on my first skim through. Now wouldn't that be a neat trick?

finchleyflower · July 2011

I just want to say one thing: this board is not owned by anybody, certainly not by any of its participants. Sometimes people on here seem to forget that.

I don't dispute anything the OP has said: I am in total agreement that we should base everything on facts (whether we like them or not) and on educating ourselves on how our bodies function. I also believe that you don't have to like everything that is posted on here and that there is no automatic guarantee of 'support'.

But I have an issue with the concept of 'the way things are done around here'. Things are not done around here in one particular way, nor should they be. That is the point of a public board. They are done in whatever multifarious ways participants post and think on this board, whether rightly or wrongly. No one has the right to dictate anything or to give official warnings.

I'm all about saying it as it is as well. In that spirit, I believe that to say that this board isn't sometimes snarky is just wrong. We can chose to call it sass, but in my opinion it isn't. Sometimes the responses on here are indeed snarky, and that, in my opinion, is entirely unnecessary. It is perceived by many posters as 'cool' though. Many responses and posters are, conversely, incredibly friendly and helpful and supportive. I will not tar the board with the same brush.

I'm sorry if people don't like what I've just said, but I'm just expressing how I see things. I have not called anyone bitter or resentful, I think it's wrong to cast aspersions like that and I don't believe that. I may have my opinions on the tone of the board, but I have not tried to change it because I believe that its purpose is to reflect its participants, not to please and appease me.

mt05 · July 2011

Yes .

Kathy4678 · July 2011

finchleyflower:

I just want to say one thing: this board is not owned by anybody, certainly not by any of its participants. Sometimes people on here seem to forget that.

I don't dispute anything the OP has said: I am in total agreement that we should base everything on facts (whether we like them or not) and on educating ourselves on how our bodies function. I also believe that you don't have to like everything that is posted on here and that there is no automatic guarantee of 'support'.

But I have an issue with the concept of 'the way things are done around here'. Things are not done around here in one particular way, nor should they be. That is the point of a public board. They are done in whatever multifarious ways participants post and think on this board, whether rightly or wrongly. No one has the right to dictate anything or to give official warnings.

I'm all about saying it as it is as well. In that spirit, I believe that to say that this board isn't sometimes snarky is just wrong. We can chose to call it sass, but in my opinion it isn't. Sometimes the responses on here are indeed snarky, and that, in my opinion, is entirely unnecessary. It is perceived by many posters as 'cool' though. Many responses and posters are, conversely, incredibly friendly and helpful and supportive. I will not tar the board with the same brush.

I'm sorry if people don't like what I've just said, but I'm just expressing how I see things. I have not called anyone bitter or resentful, I think it's wrong to cast aspersions like that and I don't believe that. I may have my opinions on the tone of the board, but I have not tried to change it because I believe that its purpose is to reflect its participants, not to please and appease me.

Except no one is dictating anything. People post what they want and people reply how they choose. Not everyone in the world is super nice or friendly. Some people ask dumb questions. Some people disagree. But there are plenty who get good advice and help. Quite honestly- there will ALWAYS be someone who posts here that you don't agree with or like. And that is regardless of the "snark" factor or not. Lord knows there are a sh!t ton of posters here that don't snark anyone at all and I can't stand them. But the dynamics of the board will not change. And all the OP is saying that if you don't like that, then leave. Cause calling people out won't help.

I think it comes down to being a member of this board. If you don't participate and then throw your opinion out there (kind of like this post, actually...) you won't get any pats on the back or well wishes. That's just not how the board is.

salt78 · July 2011

finchleyflower:
I just want to say one thing: this board is not owned by anybody, certainly not by any of its participants. Sometimes people on here seem to forget that.
I don't dispute anything the OP has said: I am in total agreement that we should base everything on facts (whether we like them or not) and on educating ourselves on how our bodies function. I also believe that you don't have to like everything that is posted on here and that there is no automatic guarantee of 'support'.
But I have an issue with the concept of 'the way things are done around here'. Things are not done around here in one particular way, nor should they be. That is the point of a public board. They are done in whatever multifarious ways participants post and think on this board, whether rightly or wrongly. No one has the right to dictate anything or to give official warnings.
I'm all about saying it as it is as well. In that spirit, I believe that to say that this board isn't sometimes snarky is just wrong. We can chose to call it sass, but in my opinion it isn't. Sometimes the responses on here are indeed snarky, and that, in my opinion, is entirely unnecessary. It is perceived by many posters as 'cool' though. Many responses and posters are, conversely, incredibly friendly and helpful and supportive. I will not tar the board with the same brush.
I'm sorry if people don't like what I've just said, but I'm just expressing how I see things. I have not called anyone bitter or resentful, I think it's wrong to cast aspersions like that and I don't believe that. I may have my opinions on the tone of the board, but I have not tried to change it because I believe that its purpose is to reflect its participants, not to please and appease me.

Hmm

Actually she has the "right" to post whatever she wants. Just as you have posted this lame novel about your feelings.

SteelCity44 · July 2011

Kathy4678:
finchleyflower:

I just want to say one thing: this board is not owned by anybody, certainly not by any of its participants. Sometimes people on here seem to forget that.

I don't dispute anything the OP has said: I am in total agreement that we should base everything on facts (whether we like them or not) and on educating ourselves on how our bodies function. I also believe that you don't have to like everything that is posted on here and that there is no automatic guarantee of 'support'.

But I have an issue with the concept of 'the way things are done around here'. Things are not done around here in one particular way, nor should they be. That is the point of a public board. They are done in whatever multifarious ways participants post and think on this board, whether rightly or wrongly. No one has the right to dictate anything or to give official warnings.

I'm all about saying it as it is as well. In that spirit, I believe that to say that this board isn't sometimes snarky is just wrong. We can chose to call it sass, but in my opinion it isn't. Sometimes the responses on here are indeed snarky, and that, in my opinion, is entirely unnecessary. It is perceived by many posters as 'cool' though. Many responses and posters are, conversely, incredibly friendly and helpful and supportive. I will not tar the board with the same brush.

I'm sorry if people don't like what I've just said, but I'm just expressing how I see things. I have not called anyone bitter or resentful, I think it's wrong to cast aspersions like that and I don't believe that. I may have my opinions on the tone of the board, but I have not tried to change it because I believe that its purpose is to reflect its participants, not to please and appease me.

Except no one is dictating anything. People post what they want and people reply how they choose. Not everyone in the world is super nice or friendly. Some people ask dumb questions. Some people disagree. But there are plenty who get good advice and help. Quite honestly- there will ALWAYS be someone who posts here that you don't agree with or like. And that is regardless of the "snark" factor or not. Lord knows there are a sh!t ton of posters here that don't snark anyone at all and I can't stand them. But the dynamics of the board will not change. And all the OP is saying that if you don't like that, then leave. Cause calling people out won't help.

I think it comes down to being a member of this board. If you don't participate and then throw your opinion out there (kind of like this post, actually...) you won't get any pats on the back or well wishes. That's just not how the board is.

I agree. We are a community here, not just another public board. If we were all sitting in the same room together talking about what we talk about here and a stranger walked in the room demanding answers to every single one of her concerns, it would be considered rude. In real life, people take time to get to know one another before asking a million questions (many of which can be searched easily on the internet or peeing on something). It can be done through lurking, answering other people's questions and participating in Waiting to O and 2WW.

finchleyflower · July 2011

I'm sorry if what I wrote has been construed as rude or offensive - that was not my intention. Not that it matters, but as a recap I agree everyone should educate themselves and not ask stupid questions, but I also think that the board contains a mix of politeness and snarkiness and support. I don't think there should be an automatic expectation of support, but I am not a fan of snarkiness.

Everyone has the right to an opinion, and once more I am sorry if mine has been badly received.

LovestruckAJ · July 2011

ClaireOtoms:
salt78:
::lurks in:: I'm giving you a standing ovation right now. ::lurks out::
Definitely just read that as "standing ovulation" on my first skim through. Now wouldn't that be a neat trick?

I'm glad I'm not the only one who did that.

Yes Yes BP

TrendyTina · July 2011

misstrish521 · July 2011

salt78:
finchleyflower:
I just want to say one thing: this board is not owned by anybody, certainly not by any of its participants. Sometimes people on here seem to forget that.
I don't dispute anything the OP has said: I am in total agreement that we should base everything on facts (whether we like them or not) and on educating ourselves on how our bodies function. I also believe that you don't have to like everything that is posted on here and that there is no automatic guarantee of 'support'.
But I have an issue with the concept of 'the way things are done around here'. Things are not done around here in one particular way, nor should they be. That is the point of a public board. They are done in whatever multifarious ways participants post and think on this board, whether rightly or wrongly. No one has the right to dictate anything or to give official warnings.
I'm all about saying it as it is as well. In that spirit, I believe that to say that this board isn't sometimes snarky is just wrong. We can chose to call it sass, but in my opinion it isn't. Sometimes the responses on here are indeed snarky, and that, in my opinion, is entirely unnecessary. It is perceived by many posters as 'cool' though. Many responses and posters are, conversely, incredibly friendly and helpful and supportive. I will not tar the board with the same brush.
I'm sorry if people don't like what I've just said, but I'm just expressing how I see things. I have not called anyone bitter or resentful, I think it's wrong to cast aspersions like that and I don't believe that. I may have my opinions on the tone of the board, but I have not tried to change it because I believe that its purpose is to reflect its participants, not to please and appease me.
Actually she has the "right" to post whatever she wants. Just as you have posted this lame novel about your feelings.

Totally off topic, but I miss having you around these parts Salt!!

keyourtnee · July 2011

phebesx:
Thank you! I've been semi-avoiding the boards lately because of all of the drama and bs. Hope it goes back to normal so I can enjoy coming around again.

This. Love you BP!!!

Mamadeus · July 2011

finchleyflower:
I just want to say one thing: this board is not owned by anybody, certainly not by any of its participants. Sometimes people on here seem to forget that.
I don't dispute anything the OP has said: I am in total agreement that we should base everything on facts (whether we like them or not) and on educating ourselves on how our bodies function. I also believe that you don't have to like everything that is posted on here and that there is no automatic guarantee of 'support'.
But I have an issue with the concept of 'the way things are done around here'. Things are not done around here in one particular way, nor should they be. That is the point of a public board. They are done in whatever multifarious ways participants post and think on this board, whether rightly or wrongly. No one has the right to dictate anything or to give official warnings.
I'm all about saying it as it is as well. In that spirit, I believe that to say that this board isn't sometimes snarky is just wrong. We can chose to call it sass, but in my opinion it isn't. Sometimes the responses on here are indeed snarky, and that, in my opinion, is entirely unnecessary. It is perceived by many posters as 'cool' though. Many responses and posters are, conversely, incredibly friendly and helpful and supportive. I will not tar the board with the same brush.
I'm sorry if people don't like what I've just said, but I'm just expressing how I see things. I have not called anyone bitter or resentful, I think it's wrong to cast aspersions like that and I don't believe that. I may have my opinions on the tone of the board, but I have not tried to change it because I believe that its purpose is to reflect its participants, not to please and appease me.

It's my way or the highway nerdbie!

SMann814 · July 2011

SteelCity44:
Kathy4678:
finchleyflower:

I just want to say one thing: this board is not owned by anybody, certainly not by any of its participants. Sometimes people on here seem to forget that.

I don't dispute anything the OP has said: I am in total agreement that we should base everything on facts (whether we like them or not) and on educating ourselves on how our bodies function. I also believe that you don't have to like everything that is posted on here and that there is no automatic guarantee of 'support'.

But I have an issue with the concept of 'the way things are done around here'. Things are not done around here in one particular way, nor should they be. That is the point of a public board. They are done in whatever multifarious ways participants post and think on this board, whether rightly or wrongly. No one has the right to dictate anything or to give official warnings.

I'm all about saying it as it is as well. In that spirit, I believe that to say that this board isn't sometimes snarky is just wrong. We can chose to call it sass, but in my opinion it isn't. Sometimes the responses on here are indeed snarky, and that, in my opinion, is entirely unnecessary. It is perceived by many posters as 'cool' though. Many responses and posters are, conversely, incredibly friendly and helpful and supportive. I will not tar the board with the same brush.

I'm sorry if people don't like what I've just said, but I'm just expressing how I see things. I have not called anyone bitter or resentful, I think it's wrong to cast aspersions like that and I don't believe that. I may have my opinions on the tone of the board, but I have not tried to change it because I believe that its purpose is to reflect its participants, not to please and appease me.

Except no one is dictating anything. People post what they want and people reply how they choose. Not everyone in the world is super nice or friendly. Some people ask dumb questions. Some people disagree. But there are plenty who get good advice and help. Quite honestly- there will ALWAYS be someone who posts here that you don't agree with or like. And that is regardless of the "snark" factor or not. Lord knows there are a sh!t ton of posters here that don't snark anyone at all and I can't stand them. But the dynamics of the board will not change. And all the OP is saying that if you don't like that, then leave. Cause calling people out won't help.

I think it comes down to being a member of this board. If you don't participate and then throw your opinion out there (kind of like this post, actually...) you won't get any pats on the back or well wishes. That's just not how the board is.

I agree. We are a community here, not just another public board. If we were all sitting in the same room together talking about what we talk about here and a stranger walked in the room demanding answers to every single one of her concerns, it would be considered rude. In real life, people take time to get to know one another before asking a million questions (many of which can be searched easily on the internet or peeing on something). It can be done through lurking, answering other people's questions and participating in Waiting to O and 2WW.

Yes Very well put! Love how you related it back to RL. If I was with my friends having a conversation and some girl I've passed on the street twice sat down at our table with her puppies and rainbows gushing about her BFP, probably wouldnt' think twice about knocking her on her a$$

When I first came to the board I didn't understand why everyone wasn't so receptive to those posts. Now after being here for a few months I completely understand....hate coming on here and weeding through the same repetitive posts day after day after day to find something worth reading and commenting on. Find myself missing out on posts that interest me because Im getting bored and frustrated by those other ones. Often wish the TTGP board had sub-categories but I know thats never going to happen.

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