Babies: 9 - 12 Months

MIL blowing on DS "area."

Today my MIL was over to help me plant some flowers while she was here she changed LO for me. I walked into his room mid diaper change and saw her blowing on his junk. He would giggle and she would do it again. I asked her to please stop she did it one more time then put on his diaper like normal. This totally weirded me out. Am I weird for thinking this is strange? DH seems to think it's totally fine and normal.
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Re: MIL blowing on DS "area."

  • CamFamCamFam member

    imageMcRib:
    I'd say that is a little weird.

    Agreed. Wasn't she worried he might pee in her face? I'd be weirded out!

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  • I would not let her change LO again. Very weird.
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  • Totally weird... and kind of creepy. Did she say why she was doing that? 
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  • I'm having flashbacks
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  • imagekdm06c:
    Totally weird... and kind of creepy. Did she say why she was doing that? 
    She said "Because it gets stuffy in there."
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  • I think it's weird.
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  • imagenutsandbolts:
    imagekdm06c:
    Totally weird... and kind of creepy. Did she say why she was doing that? 
    She said "Because it gets stuffy in there."

    Umm.. yea. No! I asked my DF what he would think if he saw his mom do that to Mathieu. He said he would flip out and that it is totally weird and creepy. 

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  • imagerobinsokj:
    I'm having flashbacks
    Flashbacks? Sorry I haven't been on here for very long, explain?
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  • imagespencers1337:
    Awhile another bumpie posted about her MIL kissing DS's penis
    Oh my! Yeah she will no longer get LO without me with him and I will be doing all diaper changes.
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  • Elmo12Elmo12 member
    Um, what??? Super weird. Super not okay.
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  • definite flashbacks because a poster had this issue before.


    Weird, and my MIL would no longer be allowed to change LO, especially since she did it again right after you told her not to.

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  • imagespencers1337:
    Awhile another bumpie posted about her MIL kissing DS's penis

    I would lose my shiit!

    And OP I would be completely weirded out by that, too and make her stop. Not ok. At all.  

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  • This whole post is cracking me up, sorry OP.  It is really weird though.  The response that it gets stuffy in there is really funny though.

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  • When my Mom changes a poop diaper, she always says " Whew, blow the stink away", but she doesn't actually blow down there- that is weird.
  • hmm, yeah...that's pretty weird.

    maybe she was trying to help dry him out after wiping him before she put his diaper on? still pretty weird, though

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  • JJ1973JJ1973 member
    She probably just wanted to hear him laugh? But definitely odd. 
  • I have been known to blow on Noah's bum during diaper change when the wipe seems to have make him extra wet. I remember someone telling me or reading that if he is to wet before you put on diaper cream it will trap the moisture and cause diaper rash. So if I don't have a towel or something I blow it dry.

    However after typing blow so much it is weirding me out

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  • After I use a wipe and my DD is still wet, I'll take her new diaper and fan her with it.  She loves it.  I'm sure it feels great after being couped up in a diaper.

    For real though, OP, your MIL meant absolutely no harm and your LO loved the fresh breeze.  Personally I think if you're seeing more into it than that, your kinda sick.  Plenty of people blow fresh air or fan their babies where the diaper was, and especially to help get it dry after a wipe. 

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  • I dont think it's weird, and I do that to dd sometimes. It's not like I bring my mouth down real close I just sit back at a normal spot. It started as drying her bum when the wipe would be really wet - she would giggle and I would do it again. I don't do it too often because I'm afrad she will pee right away in the new diaper - and my crazy mother always thinks it's cold so she thinks I will give her a chill. I'm sure it's pretty refreshing though...
  • BeaninBeanin member
    Um, yeah. That's a little strange. I wouldn't like that being done to my DS.
  • imageabc123xyzandsoforth:

    After I use a wipe and my DD is still wet, I'll take her new diaper and fan her with it.  She loves it.  I'm sure it feels great after being couped up in a diaper.

    For real though, OP, your MIL meant absolutely no harm and your LO loved the fresh breeze.  Personally I think if you're seeing more into it than that, your kinda sick.  Plenty of people blow fresh air or fan their babies where the diaper was, and especially to help get it dry after a wipe. 

     

    Sorry no. We aren't sick. She flat out asked her MIL to stop blowing on her kid's genitals and she ignored her and did it again.

     

    That is not ok. In any scenario.

     

    Its one thing to do if someone has a rash (although I've never done it.) but if someone's parent asks you to not blow on their child's gentials (not that it should need to be said) and you go out of your way to do it again immediately, you have issues.

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  • kdellokdello member

    If I used too much water on the wipe and her little butt is still damp I'll blow on it or fan her bum with a clean diaper. It cracks her up. 

    I don't think your MIL was being a perv, maybe she's just a tad weird.

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  • After talking to some family heres my plan:

    1. Tell DH how it made me feel.

    2. Ask how DH felt about the situation.

    3a. If he agrees thinking it's weird, I will drop it and control all visits with her.

    3b. If he doesn't agree I plan to ask my pedi his opinion, if the pedi says it's not a big deal then I will have to accept that (still controlling all visits), if the pedi is concerned then I will take the next neccessary steps.

     

    If I were the one blowing on his bottom to help dry him out if would be a different situation. It upsets me that I asked her to stop and she didn't.

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  • I personally don't think it's strange if she was doing it for the area to be dry before closing up the new diaper.  I actually do it to my DS.  He's a cloth diaper baby and between the sweat and pee in there it's very damp.  Since powder is bad for their lungs and it can't be used with cloth anyways, I always make sure his skin is dry before putting a new diaper on.  DS doesn't think it's funny unless I give an occasional blow to his face and his hair.  Then he cracks up.
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  • JJ1973JJ1973 member
    imagenutsandbolts:

    After talking to some family heres my plan:

    1. Tell DH how it made me feel.

    2. Ask how DH felt about the situation.

    3a. If he agrees thinking it's weird, I will drop it and control all visits with her.

    3b. If he doesn't agree I plan to ask my pedi his opinion, if the pedi says it's not a big deal then I will have to accept that (still controlling all visits), if the pedi is concerned then I will take the next neccessary steps.

     

    If I were the one blowing on his bottom to help dry him out if would be a different situation. It upsets me that I asked her to stop and she didn't.

    Can't you just have a direct conversation with her to let her know that it really bothered you? It seems to me (based on what little information you gave us) that she probably just thought it was cute to hear him giggle while she was airing him out down there and thought that you were overreacting, so kept on doing it to playfully annoy you? Not the same situation, but once when my MIL was razzing my LO up prior to when I wanted to attempt a nap, she kept on doing it even after I told her to stop. That really pissed me off. But, I think she did that because she thought I was being overly rigid about naptime kinds of things. That doesn't make it okay, but it does make it a little different. I know this really bothers you, but it just seems like a direct conversation about it might clear some things up. It is absolutely appropriate to want to supervise when you suspect something is not quite right but at the same time, it seems important to get her input prior to reacting in a fashion that might damage your relationship. 

  • I guess you would all think that I am wierd then.  I've done quick kisses and light blows on that area for both my LOs  (after bath time)  .  I love kissing them from head to toe. I would only do this while  they are babies.  They coo and giggle.

    DS is three now so I don't smother him with kisses like I used to,  but for DD who is still a baby, I still kiss her fingers, toes, head, belly button, etc.  I don't view kissing her "area" as different from when I kiss her face.

    I think its a little wierd because its your MIL, but not wierd if it was you doing it.

  • imagethumper57:

    I guess you would all think that I am wierd then.  I've done quick kisses and light blows on that area for both my LOs  (after bath time)  .  I love kissing them from head to toe. I would only do this while  they are babies.  They coo and giggle.

    DS is three now so I don't smother him with kisses like I used to,  but for DD who is still a baby, I still kiss her fingers, toes, head, belly button, etc.  I don't view kissing her "area" as different from when I kiss her face.

    I think its a little wierd because its your MIL, but not wierd if it was you doing it.

    WHAT?!  Please stop kissing your child's genitals.   

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  • imagelulupinkerton:
    imagethumper57:

    I guess you would all think that I am wierd then.  I've done quick kisses and light blows on that area for both my LOs  (after bath time)  .  I love kissing them from head to toe. I would only do this while  they are babies.  They coo and giggle.

    DS is three now so I don't smother him with kisses like I used to,  but for DD who is still a baby, I still kiss her fingers, toes, head, belly button, etc.  I don't view kissing her "area" as different from when I kiss her face.

    I think its a little wierd because its your MIL, but not wierd if it was you doing it.

    WHAT?!  Please stop kissing your child's genitals.   

    This. 

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  • imageneonniteowl:
    imagelulupinkerton:
    imagethumper57:

    I guess you would all think that I am wierd then.  I've done quick kisses and light blows on that area for both my LOs  (after bath time)  .  I love kissing them from head to toe. I would only do this while  they are babies.  They coo and giggle.

    DS is three now so I don't smother him with kisses like I used to,  but for DD who is still a baby, I still kiss her fingers, toes, head, belly button, etc.  I don't view kissing her "area" as different from when I kiss her face.

    I think its a little wierd because its your MIL, but not wierd if it was you doing it.

    WHAT?!  Please stop kissing your child's genitals.   

    This. 

    Yeah, I don't think that's something that should be admitted in writing.

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  • imagethumper57:

    I guess you would all think that I am wierd then.  I've done quick kisses and light blows on that area for both my LOs  (after bath time)  .  I love kissing them from head to toe. I would only do this while  they are babies.  They coo and giggle.

    DS is three now so I don't smother him with kisses like I used to,  but for DD who is still a baby, I still kiss her fingers, toes, head, belly button, etc.  I don't view kissing her "area" as different from when I kiss her face.

    I think its a little wierd because its your MIL, but not wierd if it was you doing it.

     

    Yep. You're right. I think you're weird for kissing your son's penis, and even weirder that you think thats normal.

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  • imageabc123xyzandsoforth:

    After I use a wipe and my DD is still wet, I'll take her new diaper and fan her with it.  She loves it.  I'm sure it feels great after being couped up in a diaper.

    For real though, OP, your MIL meant absolutely no harm and your LO loved the fresh breeze.  Personally I think if you're seeing more into it than that, your kinda sick.  Plenty of people blow fresh air or fan their babies where the diaper was, and especially to help get it dry after a wipe. 

    This.  My sister will even tease my DD and say "Better enjoy it now.  When you grow up, you can't get away with that kind of stuff!"  Like Noah's mom said, if my DD is too wet after a wipe, I want her completely dry before I put her cream on her.   I remember my pediatrician even saying to let her go without diapers for a few minutes everyday (when possible) to air the area out.

     You MIL may have just been trying to dry him, and when he giggled - like so many do with babies - she wanted to get him to laugh again so she kind of absentmindedly blew again without actually thinking "i'm blowing on his...."???  Just trying to give her the benefit of the doubt.

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  • We blow on their girly bits after baths, sometimes when we're changing their diapers or, when K was at the hospital, when trying to make them pee for a urine test sample, lol.

    I don't think it is strange to do, perverse or sexual in any way - it makes them giggle like mad and probably feels refreshing to get a breeze on an area that is normally covered up by their diaper before creams or things are put on.

    Although, I think it's fine for us to do because we are their parents - I think that if anyone else was doing it I would find it a bit strange, but it would depend on who.

    I think the OP is overreacting a bit with the whole not letting her MIL be alone with the child from now on, etc. I'd just bring it up in conversation next time you and MIL are alone with a naked LO after a bath or something that it makes you uncomfortable and you would prefer that area not to be blown on. Then show her other bits that LO finds ticklish instead.

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  • imagethumper57:

    I guess you would all think that I am wierd then.  I've done quick kisses and light blows on that area for both my LOs  (after bath time)  .  I love kissing them from head to toe. I would only do this while  they are babies.  They coo and giggle.

    DS is three now so I don't smother him with kisses like I used to,  but for DD who is still a baby, I still kiss her fingers, toes, head, belly button, etc.  I don't view kissing her "area" as different from when I kiss her face.

    I think its a little wierd because its your MIL, but not wierd if it was you doing it.

    Weird is not the word I would use for you.

  • imagejlthompson19:
    imagethumper57:

    I guess you would all think that I am wierd then.  I've done quick kisses and light blows on that area for both my LOs  (after bath time)  .  I love kissing them from head to toe. I would only do this while  they are babies.  They coo and giggle.

    DS is three now so I don't smother him with kisses like I used to,  but for DD who is still a baby, I still kiss her fingers, toes, head, belly button, etc.  I don't view kissing her "area" as different from when I kiss her face.

    I think its a little wierd because its your MIL, but not wierd if it was you doing it.

    Weird is not the word I would use for you.

    Yeah, this is bizarre IMO.

    But for the OP, I agree with the posters who are saying I think you're overreacting in the sense that you think your MIL's visits need to be supervised or that you need to talk to the pedi about it.  Be an adult and tell your MIL that when you ask her to stop doing something (and this applies to anything at all) that you expect that she respect your wishes.  I really bet she was drying him out, he laughed, she enjoyed the laughter so she repeated it to get him to laugh again.   

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  • imagespencers1337:
    Awhile another bumpie posted about her MIL kissing DS's penis

    Ick! I just about lost my breakfast.

  • imageHBaylies:
    I personally don't think it's strange if she was doing it for the area to be dry before closing up the new diaper.  I actually do it to my DS.  He's a cloth diaper baby and between the sweat and pee in there it's very damp.  Since powder is bad for their lungs and it can't be used with cloth anyways, I always make sure his skin is dry before putting a new diaper on.  DS doesn't think it's funny unless I give an occasional blow to his face and his hair.  Then he cracks up.

     

    ^this, I HIGHLY doubt your MIL was trying to molest your child. And while I agree she should have listened to you and stopped when you asked, I think she was sending you a message that said you're making a big deal out of nothing.

     

    FWIW DS is prone to rashes and irritation in the crease where his thigh meets his groin. I do fan/blow air on it sometimes to make sure it's dry before I put his diaper back on. The last thing I need is for his junk to turn into a "yeasty beastie."

     

    And HBaylies, congrats on #2!

     

    ETA: I think it's really weird that people kiss their childrens' genitals, playfully or otherwise. That's just all sorts of wrong.

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  • My LO has a huge yeast problem so I will blow down there if it isn't dry to prevent his millionth yeast infection. Yes sometimes (most of the time) he giggles which creeps me out. I agree with the pps She was most likely trying to dry him out and repeated for more giggles. Just talk to her about it.
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  • imageTofumonkey:

    We blow on their girly bits after baths, sometimes when we're changing their diapers or, when K was at the hospital, when trying to make them pee for a urine test sample, lol.

    I don't think it is strange to do, perverse or sexual in any way - it makes them giggle like mad and probably feels refreshing to get a breeze on an area that is normally covered up by their diaper before creams or things are put on.

    Although, I think it's fine for us to do because we are their parents - I think that if anyone else was doing it I would find it a bit strange, but it would depend on who.

    I think the OP is overreacting a bit with the whole not letting her MIL be alone with the child from now on, etc. I'd just bring it up in conversation next time you and MIL are alone with a naked LO after a bath or something that it makes you uncomfortable and you would prefer that area not to be blown on. Then show her other bits that LO finds ticklish instead.

    All of this.  I don't think it's that weird, and I think monitoring her visits is a huge overreaction. 

    However, you definitely need to have a talk with her about respecting your wishes.  YOU need to have a talk with her, not your DH. 

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