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I need advice regarding Owen's birthday party (long).

naturelle25naturelle25 member
in Stay at Home Moms

Yes, I know it is months away but in the Korean cultural the first birthday is a big deal and they go all out for birthday parties, so I have already started to plan it.

For Lilly's party, my IL's hosted the party at a restaurant and it was definitely more of an adult party. My IL's told us to pick wherever we wanted the party to be with Owen, so we rented out this really cute indoor kids play place mainly because we know so many kids now and Owen absolutely screeches with delight whenever we go:)  Definitely a kids party this time, but there will be adults there including friends of my IL's who are Korean.

Anyway, there is a little ceremony at the party where Owen will be sitting at a big table where certain items are set up (a pencil, book, baseball, dollar bill, etc) and he will pick one. Its supposed to represent what the child's future holds. On this table are other Korean items (tablecloth, food, banner, etc.) If we do this at the play place I will have to have them set up a seperate area for this and probably need to negotiate adding another 30 minutes in the package (party is only two hours).

So my question is...would you do the ceremony at the party or would you do it at his much, much smaller family dinner on his actual birthday? I know if we do it at the play place, it will be very rushed because we have such a limited time there. But, my IL's friends' who will be there Im sure would love to see it and will definitely be expecting it. WDYT? Oh and I know if I ask my IL's what they prefer they will say we should do whatever we want...no matter what they really think.

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Re: I need advice regarding Owen's birthday party (long).

  • kacellekacelle member
    I would probably do it at the family dinner since it's a very meaningful ceremony and you wouldn't be able to devote much time to it at the party.
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  • EnglishMajor03EnglishMajor03 member

    This is not helpful but I'm torn too!  On one hand it'd be great for all your friends and the kids friends to experience this ceremony.  It's a great learning opportunity for everyone who isn't Korean or knowledgeable about the culture.  Plus with the IL's friends there...they would be happy to see it...

    On the other hand, it seems like an incredibly important and significant part of turning one, so it might be better served at a smaller, more intimate affair.

    So- there you go.  :)  No help at all.  Sorry.

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  • littlemermaidlittlemermaid member

    Are your inlaws going to be at the more intimate family party?  If so then I would wait to do it on his actual birthday at the family party.  Since that is a more symbolic tradition it would be a shame to rush it.

    Also, my niece and nephew are Korean and on their first birthday they each had and wore a beautiful Korean outfit.  Do/did your children have these outfits for their first birthday.

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  • MAprincessMAprincess member
    If you can add 30 more minutes to the party, do it at the big event.  Otherwise, do it at the family event.
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  • nseesnsees

    I would probably do it at the main event but since your ILs are helping you out with the party costs and you said how it's especially special them maybe you could ask what their preference would be?


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  • naturelle25naturelle25 member
    imagelittlemermaid:

    Are your inlaws going to be at the more intimate family party?  If so then I would wait to do it on his actual birthday at the family party.  Since that is a more symbolic tradition it would be a shame to rush it.

    Also, my niece and nephew are Korean and on their first birthday they each had and wore a beautiful Korean outfit.  Do/did your children have these outfits for their first birthday.

    Yep, we have the outfits..they are amazing! My MIL still has relatives who live in Korea and they actually sent them from there not long after each of them were born.

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  • mrsfireflymrsfirefly

    I would do it at the big party.  Since the ceremony is so valued in Korean culture, and since the 1st birthday is so valued that in-laws' friends are attending, I think it's important that the friends see the ceremony.  I think doing it at the family thing would be much more "American" culturally (not in a bad way because that would be my inclination) but I think it's important to recognize the effort that in-laws' friends are making to celebrate your LO's life.

     Different question -- would you mind elaborating on the custom/significance of each item?  My LO's 1st is in a week and I'd love to do this at her party (funny enough, a small intimate party so we need activities!). 

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  • emathis2emathis2
    I think either way would be fine.  It does seem like a cool tradition and might be fun to share with others so they can get a glimce into the culture.  I would enjoy seeing something like that as a guest at a party.  I can also see how it might be nice to share just with the family so more time and attention can be spent on it.  For DSs #1 party we had 50+ ppl, cooked all the food, did all the decorations etc and it was a lot of work.  I don't think I would have wanted to do another activity besides all that.  Since you are planning a play place type party they usually do just about everything so it might be fun to plan to add this to the day.     
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  • naturelle25naturelle25 member
    imagemrsfirefly:

    I would do it at the big party.  Since the ceremony is so valued in Korean culture, and since the 1st birthday is so valued that in-laws' friends are attending, I think it's important that the friends see the ceremony.  I think doing it at the family thing would be much more "American" culturally (not in a bad way because that would be my inclination) but I think it's important to recognize the effort that in-laws' friends are making to celebrate your LO's life.

     Different question -- would you mind elaborating on the custom/significance of each item?  My LO's 1st is in a week and I'd love to do this at her party (funny enough, a small intimate party so we need activities!). 

    I wish I could give more info about each item but I am actually pretty clueless about it because my husband is Korean and Im not, lol! Im sure you could find a lot if you do a google search. For my daughters birthday there was a dollar bill, a book, a pen, a ball and a piece of food. She picked the pen and the ball. I was told it means she will be a scholar and an athlete. Pretty well rounded huh? :)

    someecards.com - I love the sound you make when you shut up. Lilypie Fifth Birthday tickers Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
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  • Stacyc625Stacyc625 member

    N- I never realized you were Korean! My DH lived in Korea for several years! I have seen the ceremony before- it is a lovely tradition.

    I would do it at his party- it doesn't have to be rushed!~

     

    The stack of money/bills represent wealth, yarn = long life, rice =health, pencil = studious - these are the basics.

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  • spunkyprincessmandespunkyprincessmande member
    Our friends are Korean, too, and they've always done the ceremony at a smaller party with just family.  While I would love to see it, it's probably better that way since it's such an important tradition and the other kids would probably be bored with it all.  We love hearing about what the boys pick, though!

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  • naturelle25naturelle25 member
    imageStacyc625:

    N- I never realized you were Korean! My DH lived in Korea for several years! I have seen the ceremony before- it is a lovely tradition.

    I would do it at his party- it doesn't have to be rushed!~

     

    The stack of money/bills represent wealth, yarn = long life, rice =health, pencil = studious - these are the basics.

    Im actually not, but my DH is :) Did your DH like living there? I would love to visit once the kids are older. My MIL goes back every few years.

    someecards.com - I love the sound you make when you shut up. Lilypie Fifth Birthday tickers Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
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  • Stacyc625Stacyc625 member
    imagenaturelle25:
    imageStacyc625:

    N- I never realized you were Korean! My DH lived in Korea for several years! I have seen the ceremony before- it is a lovely tradition.

    I would do it at his party- it doesn't have to be rushed!~

     

    The stack of money/bills represent wealth, yarn = long life, rice =health, pencil = studious - these are the basics.

    Im actually not, but my DH is :) Did your DH like living there? I would love to visit once the kids are older. My MIL goes back every few years.

    :)  He liked it- he definitely wants to go back and show me & the kids around there.

    Lilypie Fifth Birthday tickers Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
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