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Pregnant after a Loss
Fighting with DH (LONG - may not want to read whole thing)
I really hate it. DH thinks that I like it because I am naturally a bit of a fighter, but I really really hate it, and what he ends up saying. We started being a little cranky at each other over nothing yesterday, and in the end, it was a big fight off and on until midnight.
Basically, I knew that he was going to be cranky from the time that I called him after he got off work. I wanted to know if he wanted a bit to eat, or if he wanted me to bring something home, and he sounded incredibly annoyed. In the end, he told me he was too "hot and bothered" to go anywhere, and basically, that he needed some time to be left alone. I bit my tongue, and told him (nicely) that it would be fine, and I would fend for myself. I spent an extra hour or so at work doing paperwork (which I needed to do), got McDonalds and then headed home. He made a big deal of getting the new bassinet box out of my trunk. He ended up stubbing his toe, getting mad at me and letting the dog out of the house accidentally before he made it to my car. I just said, "Forget it!' And then, he seemed angrier, and sulked off.
I decided I was taking the dog for a walk, with my Ipod of course. I dropped the dog off after a few blocks, and took a few slow laps on my own. There were tons of people outside yesterday, and even though it was dark, it did not seem odd to me. When I got back, H started lecturing me on how stupid I was to walk outside without my phone and my Ipod. He would not let up, and kept standing in front the area where I keep my PNVs and the sink, so I finally I yelled that he should leave me alone, and get out the way! This made him pretty mad, so he went out to the garage (typical) with a pizza.
I went back out to talk to him several times (in the garage) and what really bothered me is that he blames me for the whole debacle. I played my part but he never admits that he says things that are out of line too. Then he went so far as to say that I "have no idea what I do to him", "do not give an inch in this relationship", "do not care for him", yadda, yadda. Basically, anything that will make me sound like a cold hearted b!tch.
Now, to clarify, I thought that things had been really good up until this fight tonight. We have the occasional disagreement but nothing big lately. We call each other throughout the day, say I love you in the morning and evening, do lots of things together re: the baby. We just got back from a little vacation where we got along beautifully. What hurts me is that none of this seems to matter to him?
We haven't really talked today - he left without saying Goodbye. It's fine. I just feel like we'll be avoiding each other, and I'll be in tears this whole weekend. I guess that we could go for that counseling again, but it just seems so trivial when it starts.
If you have read this, you are a trooper, and I love you. Probably too much info out on the internet, but I had to vent, and I think most people know about us anyway. Thanks ladies.
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Re: Fighting with DH (LONG - may not want to read whole thing)
BFP #2 4/13/10. Bridget born 12/28/10
BFP #3 Finn born 8/11/15
[url=http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=UBB&utm_campaign=tickers][img]http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tt1cb8c4.aspx[/img][/url]
He just has pissy days. Granted they aren't always often, but he doesn't snap out of it when it happens.
This...MH can be a b.tch sometimes too for no reason but it usually turns out to be work related. {{big hugs}} for this weekend. I would just give him time and let him come to you when he's ready.
"Our greatest glory isn't in never falling but in rising every time we fall"
8/24/09 3rd cycle on 50mg Clomid= BFP 9/23/09 =10/8/09 m/c #2 at 6wks 2days 3/9/10 4th Cycle on 50mg Clomid = BFP 4-5-10 200mg prometrium 2xdaily 1st beta/progesterone 10dpo=43 2nd beta 13dpo=339 u/s 4/16=5wks 3days single visible sac and fetal pole h/b 4/28=Suprise it's Twins! 150 and 127 bpm Labor Buddy to Sonadora and Strunella
Thank you. I just thought that things had been really good lately. I know that he is not always this way, but it just hurts that he thinks I am some awful wife all the time . . . not just when we're fighting. I don't get it.
I'm sorry. ((Hugs)) Please don't apologize for venting here. We are all here for you. Sometimes it helps just to get it out.
((More Hugs))
DH and I go to counseling. Sometimes I feel that our problems are trivial, but I'm glad we had a relationship established with a counselor because since the m/c our marriage has been really rocky. We just seem to totally miss each other. It really helps sometimes to see things from a neutral perspective.
I'm sorry you've had a rough time. One thing he needs to learn is that you never use the words "always" and "never" when discussing a relationship. You have to give specific examples about things that bother you so that your partner can work on them.
{hugs}
aw, I'm so sorry :-(
DH and I have been fighting A LOT in the past few weeks. I pray it has a lot to do with my pregnancy hormones because I'll admit - I feel a little coo coo lately.
I hope you guys work it out fast and are able to enjoy the weekend.
It sounds like he was upset about something that has nothing to do with you since he was in a bad mood to begin with.
HUGS and take care of that LO