Question for the unexplained IF ladies

UMichGirl · February 2010

At what point did you (or will you) begin treatment?

Backstory: DH and I are on cycle 20. We've been trying since September '08 (so a year and a half). Began meeting with the RE last summer to get tested and see if there were any problems. Only thing we found were my thyroid numbers a tad high, so I got put on synthroid. We decided to keep trying on our own for awhile.

In the meantime, the synthroid did a number on my TSH. Within a couple months it was at a 0.0005. I was referred to an endocrinologist who did more comprehensive b/w, and we've been waiting to see where my numbers go. As of this past week, I'm back to normal with my TSH, T3, and T4.

I was SO happy...this was the reason we were putting off treatment. But now that we've been given the OK, I'm hesitant to contact my RE again. I just feel like if we give it ONE more cycle, maybe that would be the cycle we'd get pregnant on our own. I know it hasn't happened yet, so the chances of that happening are pretty low...but it took my parents 4 years to conceive me so maybe we just need to be more patient?

I don't know...I just don't know how or when to pull the trigger and say "go". Maybe we should wait to start treatment until the summer when I'm out of work (teacher) so that appointments will be easier to make? But then I wonder if I'm just putting off the inevitable and we'll be wasting the next 3.5 months in the meantime.

Sorry for the long post, DH and I are just struggling with what to do right now. Thanks for any input, and for reading this far if you've made it!

DinaLINY · February 2010

we waited too long and I regret it. We TTC'd for 3 years before I said "ok, we need help". I will be honest though, TTCing was not always a top priority during those 3 years (jobs lost, some other issues).

IMO, just pull the trigger and go.

ETA: My parents also had trouble conceiving me, but you have to keep in mind that fert treatments were not available back then. So our parents didn't have a choice but to wait it out and keep trying, we do.

Dragonfly1226 · February 2010

I am unexplained. We were able to conceive on our own in the spring of 08, but I had a m/c in May of 08. After that I had complications from the D&E procedure. When my cycles started to become regular again, I also started having spotting throughout my LP. So even though I am unexplained the LP spotting was alarming and (to me) a signal that something was wrong. We did two Clomid cycles with the OBGYN to see if that would make me stop spotting. After those cycles didn't work we went to an RE who didn't find anything wrong in his testing. We started treatments with the RE in July of 09 - about 14 months after the first m/c.

I am really glad we started with the RE when we did. As it turns out I have had three failed IUIs and a successful IVF that resulted in another m/c. Here we are planning to do a second IVF in April/May. That will be two years after the first m/c when we started having problems and we are still TTC #1.

I guess I would say that both you and your dh have to be ready to start treatments. If you don't feel ready, it's okay to give yourself a little more time.

I will say that I am a teacher, and it's really not that hard to cycle during the school year. In fact, I prefer to have work as a distraction. Most of the appointments for monitoring are before school anyway. When I had IUIs I just had coverage in my classroom for a few hours while I went to get it done. For IVF I only had to take off the day after ER (mine was on a Sunday) and two days for ET. I have a ton of sick days saved up so it really hasn't been a problem at all.

GL with your decision

Sarahp63 · February 2010

IMO, I believe if you have atrue IF dx that it will never get easier the longer you try or put it off. If your heart is ready for this and you truly desire a baby, then you will want the help. We have been ttc for almost 26 mos and still no baby. I also have unexplained and Im only 25.

NYC1216 · February 2010

We started treatment once I found out I had PCO. My MD told me it could take a long time to get pregnant so we started clomid in Sept/Oct 2009 and have moved ahead full force since then

I dont think there is any right answer for when to start IF treatment. It is really whatever is comfortable for you and DH.

UMichGirl · February 2010

Thanks for your responses everyone. I know that no one can tell us when we're ready...I also just don't know how to decide when we're ready for ourselves. We keep setting 'deadlines' in our minds of when to go in, and then that time will come and we'll come up with some reason to wait longer. (The main reason being that we feel like we should be able to get pregnant on our own since even our doctor has told us that! The joys of unexplained...) But then it just ends up being a huge emotional disappointment every time AF shows up again.

<sigh>

UMichGirl · February 2010

kdodge423:
Sarahp63:
IMO, I believe if you have atrue IF dx that it will never get easier the longer you try or put it off. If your heart is ready for this and you truly desire a baby, then you will want the help. We have been ttc for almost 26 mos and still no baby. I also have unexplained and Im only 25.

So because we chose to wait until we were ready for help we really don't want a baby until then? I don't think so.

We do truly desire a baby. We want to start our family more than anything right now. But...we'd like to think that we can start our family on our own without medical intervention since every test we've had done right now points to the fact that we should be able to.

However I do realize everyone is different and that's why I asked this question in my post to begin with...I know some people will want to start treatments right away, while others (like me and DH) tend to wait it out a bit. I just wanted to hear everyone's reasons and opinions to try and help me and DH get a better (or different? not sure if 'better' is the right word) perspective on where we stand together.

We definitely want to start our family though...There is no question about that!

scooterq · February 2010

I know exactly what you mean. We're unexplained and have been ttc since 08. We've been back and forth on when to start treatment too, because like you said feel like if no problems have been found we should be able to get PG on our own. But at the same time, it hasn't happened so far, so obviously we may need some help. We are giving it this month and next and if it doesn't happen, we are going to the RE.

It also took my parent a long time to conceive me. 6 years actually. It was secondary IF for them though, because they got pregnant with my older brother (who's 7 years older than me) with no problem.

Matthews Wifey · February 2010

DH and I are unexplained and we went to see a RE 1 year after trying to get pregnant. We started clomid right away. Did two IUIs and now we are starting IVF in march/april. I was a little hesitant at first to proceed with IUIs. Clomid was no big deal for us since it is just a pill for 5 days. I am glad we have moved ahead because in june it will be 2 years and still no baby. We might be able to get pregnant on our own but it may be another 3 years or we still might not be pregnant in 3 years and thats not a chance I am willing to take. Unexplained to me is that they just haven't found the problem yet. Good luck in your decision.

DinaLINY · February 2010

it doesn't sound like you are ready - IMO

when I finally did make that first RE appt, I couldn't wait to go and get started. It was all I could think about. it is a huge step to take and you have to be 100% ready for it.

GL in whatever you decide.

iwannababy2010 · February 2010

I would go to the RE now...there are a ton of tests to take and it can take some time scheduling all these appointments. We waited one year of TTC and then jumped right in. I started my RE appointments/testing in the summer - unfortunately, I am still in the world of IF - hoping for my BFP when IVF #2 starts next week.

Odds aren't in the favor of it working on our own when it has been over a year of TTC.

Good luck with your decision. I hope you get pregnant soon!

patchen30 · February 2010

I have thyroid problems too and found out my TSH was high after 7 months of TTC. It was after 11 months of TTC that my TSH became normal. I didn't want to try anymore without help, so I did 2 Clomid cycles and 4 injectible IUIs and I'm still not pg. So, point is it's unlikely that the problem is my thyroid. We don't really know what it is. I would just caution against holding out that the thyroid is the magic bullet. What does your RE say? Mine said my thyroid was most likely not the problem and he seems to be right.

UMichGirl · February 2010

patchen30:
I have thyroid problems too and found out my TSH was high after 7 months of TTC. It was after 11 months of TTC that my TSH became normal. I didn't want to try anymore without help, so I did 2 Clomid cycles and 4 injectible IUIs and I'm still not pg. So, point is it's unlikely that the problem is my thyroid. We don't really know what it is. I would just caution against holding out that the thyroid is the magic bullet. What does your RE say? Mine said my thyroid was most likely not the problem and he seems to be right.

Yeah, my RE didn't think my thyroid was keeping me from getting pregnant most likely...He just didn't want to start any form of treatment with my numbers out of normal range. I plan on calling him this week though to talk to him about our next steps. DH and I talked about everything this evening and I think we may take one more cycle (the one that started today) to try on our own...and head in next cycle to start treatment. I want to see what he has to say though since it has been a couple months since I last spoke with him.

veronicacorningstone · February 2010

We've had all the tests and are unexplained.

My DH and I went to an RE about a year after TTC on our own, with no luck. We were with that RE for about a year, we did 6 IUIs, three of which were with injectibles.

When those didn't work, we tried acupuncture and herbs for a few months to see if that approach would work. Nope.

Finally, we went to another RE and just completed our first IVF cycle. Miracle of miracles, we're pregnant. IVF worked when nothing else did. We kinda wonder whether our problem all along has been with fertilization since both embryos implanted (We did IVF w/ICSI) We obviously don't know that answer since we did use ICSI, but that's just what it seems like to us.

As for you guys, I guess you really need to sit down and talk about taking this next step. You both need to be on the same page and ready to make a concerted effort to begin treatments. Hopefully, with whatever you decide, you will get your prayers answered.

UMichGirl · February 2010

veronicacorningstone:
We've had all the tests and are unexplained.
My DH and I went to an RE about a year after TTC on our own, with no luck. We were with that RE for about a year, we did 6 IUIs, three of which were with injectibles.
When those didn't work, we tried acupuncture and herbs for a few months to see if that approach would work. Nope.
Finally, we went to another RE and just completed our first IVF cycle. Miracle of miracles, we're pregnant. IVF worked when nothing else did. We kinda wonder whether our problem all along has been with fertilization since both embryos implanted (We did IVF w/ICSI) We obviously don't know that answer since we did use ICSI, but that's just what it seems like to us.
As for you guys, I guess you really need to sit down and talk about taking this next step. You both need to be on the same page and ready to make a concerted effort to begin treatments. Hopefully, with whatever you decide, you will get your prayers answered.

Congrats!! Big Smile

DH and I did have a talk today...I think we're going to give this cycle a try on our own, but set up next cycle to be with the RE. We'll see what happens!

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