Who is the husband that you didn't get?

Echowysp · December 2009

Not meaning you want a divorce or that you aren't happy, but what was the ideal husband that you just realize your dh isn't?

Mine is the serious husband. While he can be serious for periods of time, he's more likely to go into super silly, joking mode. I love it at times, but at times, I long for the quiet husband I thought I'd have.

Who is yours?

ABMcKinney · December 2009

Honestly I can't even remember what I thought I wanted. What I have is just that amazing! He's everything I could have asked for. Of course he isn't perfect, but (cheeseball alert! cheeseball alert!) he's perfect for me

MrsJuneHawk · December 2009

The guy who cleans up after himself, is not messy, is romantic and thoughtful and loves to buy me shoes. OK, that last one is hard to find.

exhausted_bride · December 2009

I married him. I swear it!

Mrs.Goldenblatt · December 2009

Mine is the take charge husband. His mom did everything because she was a control freak so I fell into that role.

We do things as a partnership alot but it does leave me with most of the decision making and then asking for his input. I'm the planner, bill payer, decision maker- you get the picture.

I'm not gonna lie, part of me likes it that way but some days I do want to just follow his lead.

kelbrian · December 2009

ABMcKinney:
Honestly I can't even remember what I thought I wanted. What I have is just that amazing! He's everything I could have asked for. Of course he isn't perfect, but (cheeseball alert! cheeseball alert!) he's perfect for me

Ditto this. He respects me, compliments me, and is romantic when he wants to be. He's definitely not perfect, but neither am I.

My husband is perfect for me as well

AmyDrinkie · December 2009

The husband with a higher paying job. I'm tired of being the breadwinner and going without things I had no problem buying when I was single.

Echowysp · December 2009

kelbrian:
ABMcKinney:
Honestly I can't even remember what I thought I wanted. What I have is just that amazing! He's everything I could have asked for. Of course he isn't perfect, but (cheeseball alert! cheeseball alert!) he's perfect for me
Ditto this. He respects me, compliments me, and is romantic when he wants to be. He's definitely not perfect, but neither am I.
My husband is perfect for me as well

If he's not perfect, that's the part I'm looking for. Can't throw a girl a bone, huh? Have to rub it in with this "Oooh, *my* husband never gets on my nerves. He's perfect for me!" crap, huh?? Stick out tongue

megontoast · December 2009

I wanted a tattooed bad boy, but got the clean cut goody two-shoes. And THANK GOD for that, because my husband is pretty much the most amazing person ever. The only thing he needs to work on is his forgetfulness and planning skills. He is a SAHD, and is usually a flustered mess by the time I'm calling to say I'm on my way home. He is doing the best he can, but sometimes I get frustrated because I'm the exact opposite...

kgrl21 · December 2009

I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough Wink

) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.

auslyn804 · December 2009

The romantic part is what I miss. DH will do something thoughtful/romantic once or twice a year so I'm not completely at a loss for it. But I am soo lucky to have him and all the rest of his traits. And....he puts up with me and ALL of the traits that I am missing so I'm lucky!

Echowysp · December 2009

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.

Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.

megontoast · December 2009

AmyDrinkie:
The husband with a higher paying job. I'm tired of being the breadwinner and going without things I had no problem buying when I was single.

This would be nice, too. LOL But replace "higher paying" with "a".

*NNO* · December 2009

I thought I'd be married to the business man. Wears a suit all the time, carries a briefcase, has clients, etc.
Nope. I married the blue collar worker (Electrical Engineering field), and I am VERY glad I did. I find it sexy. Wink

Temp449052375008045 · December 2009

The romantic man. DH doesn't have a romantic bone in his body.

peeps61308 · December 2009

Echowysp:

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.

Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.

I'm with you...this is kind of depressing...lol

Echowysp · December 2009

peeps61308:
Echowysp:

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.

Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.

I'm with you...this is kind of depressing...lol

I know. I was just feeling a bit sad that dh had annoyed me today simply by being in a overly silly mood and I was looking for a bit of "Oh yeah, I thought I'd get the guy who always took out the trash." Not "I dont' know what you're talking about. My marriage is perfect!" Now I feel even worse. Crying

citygirl_ · December 2009

I got him! He used to be silly all of the time but he is so great... he knows now when I need him to make me laugh and he knows when to be serious. I have such a great guy.

honeybeez · December 2009

Love my husband, but he could be more romantic, loving, and not such a workaholic. DH can never sit down and relax, he's always working on something.

exhausted_bride · December 2009

oh, okay. I got one. The "bad boy". But I had dated so many bad boys... and when you hit your mid 20's all the qualities that make you a bad boy just equal loser.... I just feel I met DH at the right time... after I had dated every other type of man. Usually the bad boy, though.

kelbrian · December 2009

Echowysp:
peeps61308:
Echowysp:

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.
Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.
I'm with you...this is kind of depressing...lol
I know. I was just feeling a bit sad that dh had annoyed me today simply by being in a overly silly mood and I was looking for a bit of "Oh yeah, I thought I'd get the guy who always took out the trash." Not "I dont' know what you're talking about. My marriage is perfect!" Now I feel even worse.

My marriage isn't perfect at all, but I try really hard to look at the positives. I do wish that DH wanted to work in an industry that paid more. That is something that I'm trying to get over. I would like more money, and DH doesn't care one bit about money and doesn't really worry about it, even though he should a little more.

jays_bride · December 2009

JuneSUBride:

The romantic man. DH doesn't have a romantic bone in his body.

Yah, this.

Echowysp · December 2009

kelbrian:
Echowysp:
peeps61308:
Echowysp:

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.
Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.
I'm with you...this is kind of depressing...lol
I know. I was just feeling a bit sad that dh had annoyed me today simply by being in a overly silly mood and I was looking for a bit of "Oh yeah, I thought I'd get the guy who always took out the trash." Not "I dont' know what you're talking about. My marriage is perfect!" Now I feel even worse.
My marriage isn't perfect at all, but I try really hard to look at the positives. I do wish that DH wanted to work in an industry that paid more. That is something that I'm trying to get over. I would like more money, and DH doesn't care one bit about money and doesn't really worry about it, even though he should a little more.

See, that's all I was looking for. Thanks for the bone. :-)

AmyDrinkie · December 2009

megontoast:
AmyDrinkie:
The husband with a higher paying job. I'm tired of being the breadwinner and going without things I had no problem buying when I was single.
This would be nice, too. LOL But replace "higher paying" with "a".

Man, that is even MORE of a drag. Booooo.

citygirl_ · December 2009

WAIT - I DO wish my husband would change the litter automatically every day now that I can't!!!

AND our trashcan is wayyy too full right now!

betsnup · December 2009

Echowysp:
peeps61308:
Echowysp:

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.

Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.

I'm with you...this is kind of depressing...lol
I know. I was just feeling a bit sad that dh had annoyed me today simply by being in a overly silly mood and I was looking for a bit of "Oh yeah, I thought I'd get the guy who always took out the trash." Not "I dont' know what you're talking about. My marriage is perfect!" Now I feel even worse.

I think it's a little weird that people always reply with the "he's perfect for me!" and no other comments. I love my DH and can't imagine my life without him, but I do dream of the day he gets a little more aggressive and actually makes a phone call of his own for once (it is so annoying to be the one who has to call when a bill is wrong, or even to freaking order pizza).

HisWifeHerMom · December 2009

DH and I are a great match in some ways but not so much in others. He is honestly one of the most proud, stubborn men I have ever met. That is annoying beyond words. He is messy and I am not. The worst part, when we were dating, he was so lovable and affectionate, which is great because I am but now he has become quite unaffectionate and unemotional. It makes me sad. Sad

However, he is an awesome daddy and a hard worker and that counts for something.

LoriFalce · December 2009

Well, the guy I thought was perfect liked to sleep with other guys, so I'm really prepared to let a lot of things slide as long as Matthew doesn't start reading Playgirl.

Temp449052375008045 · December 2009

betsnup:
Echowysp:
peeps61308:
Echowysp:

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.

Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.

I'm with you...this is kind of depressing...lol

I know. I was just feeling a bit sad that dh had annoyed me today simply by being in a overly silly mood and I was looking for a bit of "Oh yeah, I thought I'd get the guy who always took out the trash." Not "I dont' know what you're talking about. My marriage is perfect!" Now I feel even worse.

I think it's a little weird that people always reply with the "he's perfect for me!" and no other comments. I love my DH and can't imagine my life without him, but I do dream of the day he gets a little more aggressive and actually makes a phone call of his own for once (it is so annoying to be the one who has to call when a bill is wrong, or even to freaking order pizza).

You are describing my DH. Seriously! Man up!

exhausted_bride · December 2009

betsnup:
Echowysp:
peeps61308:
Echowysp:

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.

Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.

I'm with you...this is kind of depressing...lol

I know. I was just feeling a bit sad that dh had annoyed me today simply by being in a overly silly mood and I was looking for a bit of "Oh yeah, I thought I'd get the guy who always took out the trash." Not "I dont' know what you're talking about. My marriage is perfect!" Now I feel even worse.

I think it's a little weird that people always reply with the "he's perfect for me!" and no other comments. I love my DH and can't imagine my life without him, but I do dream of the day he gets a little more aggressive and actually makes a phone call of his own for once (it is so annoying to be the one who has to call when a bill is wrong, or even to freaking order pizza).

It's weird that I think my husband is perfect for me?? Oooookay....

exhausted_bride · December 2009

betsnup:
Echowysp:
peeps61308:
Echowysp:

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.

Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.

I'm with you...this is kind of depressing...lol

I know. I was just feeling a bit sad that dh had annoyed me today simply by being in a overly silly mood and I was looking for a bit of "Oh yeah, I thought I'd get the guy who always took out the trash." Not "I dont' know what you're talking about. My marriage is perfect!" Now I feel even worse.

I think it's a little weird that people always reply with the "he's perfect for me!" and no other comments. I love my DH and can't imagine my life without him, but I do dream of the day he gets a little more aggressive and actually makes a phone call of his own for once (it is so annoying to be the one who has to call when a bill is wrong, or even to freaking order pizza).

It's weird that I think my husband is perfect for me?? Oooookay....

kgrl21 · December 2009

kelbrian:
Echowysp:
peeps61308:
Echowysp:

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.
Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.
I'm with you...this is kind of depressing...lol
I know. I was just feeling a bit sad that dh had annoyed me today simply by being in a overly silly mood and I was looking for a bit of "Oh yeah, I thought I'd get the guy who always took out the trash." Not "I dont' know what you're talking about. My marriage is perfect!" Now I feel even worse.
My marriage isn't perfect at all, but I try really hard to look at the positives. I do wish that DH wanted to work in an industry that paid more. That is something that I'm trying to get over. I would like more money, and DH doesn't care one bit about money and doesn't really worry about it, even though he should a little more.

No, don't get it twisted. Far, far from perfect, but I can live with it. I really try hard not to sweat the small stuff. Because those are really the things that can beat your marriage down. For all the times I think DH is being an ass, I try to remember all the times he's the most wonderful person in the world.

For example I started feeling sick last night and DH was at the Bears game for a bachelor party. He knew I wasn;t feeling well and got up with DD this morning, but then 30 mins later wakes me up because he's sick(hungover) and feeling like he's going to puke.

He goes back to bed for another 2 hrs. and I was pissed. So I had an attitude with him most of the day. But he went and got my favorite soup from Panera and said he will get up with her tomorrow so I can rest.

He also just came in here to tell me he changed the sheets, set up the humidifier and put out a box of tissues for me. And is about to make me tea. What more can I ask for.

betsnup · December 2009

exhausted_bride:
betsnup:

I think it's a little weird that people always reply with the "he's perfect for me!" and no other comments. I love my DH and can't imagine my life without him, but I do dream of the day he gets a little more aggressive and actually makes a phone call of his own for once (it is so annoying to be the one who has to call when a bill is wrong, or even to freaking order pizza).

It's weird that I think my husband is perfect for me?? Oooookay....

No, I think it's weird that some people can't think of one little thing that annoys them about their husband. Oooookay?

Rubygirl · December 2009

The full-time working kind. I thought for sure I'd marry a financially stable, 40 hr/week type. DH is SO not that guy. He was though when we got married. I was fooled!

ETA: also the kind that once, just ONCE, would get up with DS in the morning so I could sleep in. I never have, since the day he was born.

exhausted_bride · December 2009

betsnup:
exhausted_bride:
betsnup:

I think it's a little weird that people always reply with the "he's perfect for me!" and no other comments. I love my DH and can't imagine my life without him, but I do dream of the day he gets a little more aggressive and actually makes a phone call of his own for once (it is so annoying to be the one who has to call when a bill is wrong, or even to freaking order pizza).

It's weird that I think my husband is perfect for me?? Oooookay....

No, I think it's weird that some people can't think of one little thing that annoys them about their husband. Oooookay?

Oh, sorry. I totally thought she asked who our ideal husband was.... not something that annoys us... I must need reading comprehension skillzzzz

Rubygirl · December 2009

AmyDrinkie:
megontoast:
AmyDrinkie:
The husband with a higher paying job. I'm tired of being the breadwinner and going without things I had no problem buying when I was single.
This would be nice, too. LOL But replace "higher paying" with "a".
Man, that is even MORE of a drag. Booooo.

Oh man, do I feel your pain. I miss being able to buy what I wanted. I was actually reminiscing to myself yesterday about my single days. Oh the freedom and the discretionary income!

Echowysp · December 2009

exhausted_bride:
betsnup:
Echowysp:
peeps61308:
Echowysp:

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.

Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.

I'm with you...this is kind of depressing...lol

I know. I was just feeling a bit sad that dh had annoyed me today simply by being in a overly silly mood and I was looking for a bit of "Oh yeah, I thought I'd get the guy who always took out the trash." Not "I dont' know what you're talking about. My marriage is perfect!" Now I feel even worse.

I think it's a little weird that people always reply with the "he's perfect for me!" and no other comments. I love my DH and can't imagine my life without him, but I do dream of the day he gets a little more aggressive and actually makes a phone call of his own for once (it is so annoying to be the one who has to call when a bill is wrong, or even to freaking order pizza).

It's weird that I think my husband is perfect for me?? Oooookay....

There's nothing you'd change about him? There's never a moment of "Wow, that behavior isn't what I saw when we were dating"

To be honest, I usually find the statement that someone is perfect for someone else in the same category of "I'm always happy!" . A nice sentiment, but not realistic.

lite-bright · December 2009

I thought I'd marry (and dated a lot of) either musicians or theater guys -- kind of temperamental at times, very into the arts, etc.

I married a very rational, logical scientist and am so, so glad that I did. The kind of guy I liked to date for most of my life would've been a disaster for me to marry, and thank God I realized it and appreciated DH when I met him. Although DH is a scientist who draws/paints on occasion and is an eloquent writer, so there's that.

Not to jump in line, but he truly is perfect for me.

kgrl21 · December 2009

betsnup:
exhausted_bride:
betsnup:

I think it's a little weird that people always reply with the "he's perfect for me!" and no other comments. I love my DH and can't imagine my life without him, but I do dream of the day he gets a little more aggressive and actually makes a phone call of his own for once (it is so annoying to be the one who has to call when a bill is wrong, or even to freaking order pizza).

It's weird that I think my husband is perfect for me?? Oooookay....
No, I think it's weird that some people can't think of one little thing that annoys them about their husband. Oooookay?

Well find me weird but like I said I try not to sweat the small stuff. Although I don't always succeed. And actually I think the question was about the type of person you thought you would marry but didn't. Everything about DH I can live with or I wouldn't have married him. So to me he is perfect. Besides, Brad Pitt was already taken at the time so no sense in dwelling on that.

exhausted_bride · December 2009

Echowysp:
exhausted_bride:
betsnup:
Echowysp:
peeps61308:
Echowysp:

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.

Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.

I'm with you...this is kind of depressing...lol

I know. I was just feeling a bit sad that dh had annoyed me today simply by being in a overly silly mood and I was looking for a bit of "Oh yeah, I thought I'd get the guy who always took out the trash." Not "I dont' know what you're talking about. My marriage is perfect!" Now I feel even worse.

I think it's a little weird that people always reply with the "he's perfect for me!" and no other comments. I love my DH and can't imagine my life without him, but I do dream of the day he gets a little more aggressive and actually makes a phone call of his own for once (it is so annoying to be the one who has to call when a bill is wrong, or even to freaking order pizza).

It's weird that I think my husband is perfect for me?? Oooookay....

There's nothing you'd change about him? There's never a moment of "Wow, that behavior isn't what I saw when we were dating"

To be honest, I usually find the statement that someone is perfect for someone else in the same category of "I'm always happy!" . A nice sentiment, but not realistic.

100% would not change ONE THING about him. It makes me sad this sentiment seems to escape so many people. Yes, I love him exactly how he is. He is perfect for me. To change anything about him would not make him "him". Sorry. :::shrugs::: Oh, and no, I am not happy all the time. But this does not have to do with my marriage... I don't understand how the two are connected.

Echowysp · December 2009

exhausted_bride:
Echowysp:
exhausted_bride:
betsnup:
Echowysp:
peeps61308:
Echowysp:

kgrl21:
I was actually lucky enough(mostly smart enough) to get the perfect man for me. Honestly.

Meh. You guys just need to shove it with your perfect men.

I'm with you...this is kind of depressing...lol

I know. I was just feeling a bit sad that dh had annoyed me today simply by being in a overly silly mood and I was looking for a bit of "Oh yeah, I thought I'd get the guy who always took out the trash." Not "I dont' know what you're talking about. My marriage is perfect!" Now I feel even worse.

I think it's a little weird that people always reply with the "he's perfect for me!" and no other comments. I love my DH and can't imagine my life without him, but I do dream of the day he gets a little more aggressive and actually makes a phone call of his own for once (it is so annoying to be the one who has to call when a bill is wrong, or even to freaking order pizza).

It's weird that I think my husband is perfect for me?? Oooookay....

There's nothing you'd change about him? There's never a moment of "Wow, that behavior isn't what I saw when we were dating"

To be honest, I usually find the statement that someone is perfect for someone else in the same category of "I'm always happy!" . A nice sentiment, but not realistic.

100% would not change ONE THING about him. It makes me sad this sentiment seems to escape so many people. Yes, I love him exactly how he is. He is perfect for me. To change anything about him would not make him "him". Sorry. :::shrugs::: Oh, and no, I am not happy all the time. But this does not have to do with my marriage... I don't understand how the two are connected.

Then you're lucky.

While I love my husband's jovial side, it sometimes annoys me when I'm tired or just in the mood for a serious conversation. Makes me feel like shiit when that happens and I was just looking for a little bit of comfort.

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