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3rd Trimester
Take matters into my own hands???
My baby shower is Aug. 8th and I have yet to get invitations out in the mail, better yet, my "baby shower commitee" has yet to plan it. Everytime I ask them when they are going to get started, they say someting really stupid as if I am bugging them, or they say I am not supposed to have anything to do with it, but I am afraid if i don't give them some idea of how I want it to be, then everything is gonna go sour. I am not the one to beg and if I have to throw my own baby shower, I sure in the hell will. I just find it very frustrating that they haven't mentioned anything about the shower and with it being a co-ed, there will be lots of people there and I just want ot make sure that everything goes right. I am panicking at this point. Should I just say screw them and do it myself? 
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Take matters into my own hands???
Um, wow. Please brace yourself before the reactions and flames start pouring in.?
You should be honored that you have people willing to throw you a shower.. not demanding things go a certain way. Nobody is required to go through that trouble for you - so lets take off the tiara and reevaluate.
I do not suggest you throwing your own shower. That is beyond tacky to me. ?
The O'Baby Blog
Um. No don't throw your own shower.
and you may want to edit out the word "retarded", that will get you a lot of negative feedback.
This you brat.
Before using a word like "retarded" to mean something stupid, please consider that it is highly offensive to a lot of people, especially those who have friends, relatives, and children with disabilities.
I hate to be the word police but this one really bothers me. Here is some information on the subject: https://www.r-word.org/
My shower is the same day and I have not seen invites either! There was other drama between my sister and friends budding heads on who got to plan it. So frustrating! I was at the point that I didn't even care if I had a shower.
I would never throw my own shower and I don't think you should have to either!
I would just nicely ask them again if they had gotten the invites out yet. Say that you have family asking about it or something and need to give them details and you don't know what to tell them! Maybe that will get them going!?
Many many things are wrong with this post.
1. The use of the R word, not necessary.
2. So tacky to plan your own shower, or send the invitations yourself.
3. Sounds like you are spoiled and begging for gifts.
Agreed. Your lucky Red isn't here today otherwise you'd really get it!!!
1 - Edit the word "retarded" out of your post. It's highly offensive to a lot of people around here.
2 - Throwing your own shower is tacky. It's pretty much the same as begging for gifts. If I got invited to a shower someone was throwing for themselves, I wouldn't go and I wouldn't send a gift either.
i say throw your own shower! who cares how tacky it will look...
and while you are at it why not give it a theme? may i suggest luau themed? you could wear a cute grass skirt and coconuts
im just saying
Ze Blog | Tweet Tweet | Link to "retired" EP Badges
BFP#2 ~ 8/2/11, EDD 4/11/12, D&C 9/12/11 at 9w5d
BFP#3 ~ 4/15/12, EDD 12/21/12 ~ DD born 12/22/12
Yeah. I'm going to use this as my response, too.
Baking Blog
I don't get people getting all uptight about a shower...If someone is nice enough to through you a shower, say thank you. Sheesh
"they say someting really stupid as if I am bugging them"
She substituted "stupid" as a more correct word choice...
It's not like the shower is this weekend. These things really don't take that much time to plan. My shower is the 1st, and the girl who is throwing it is sending out invites on Monday.
It's way too far in advance to be acting like a stuck up, snotty brat. If you block off your Saturday and show up and there is no party, I'll let you rant and rave.
It would be super weird to host your own baby shower and I am pretty sure you would aliantate your friends.
If they have said they will throw you one, then trust them and leave them alone. If they let you down, well then you've learned they aren't good friends, but it hink your best off leaving them alone and not worrying about it. When someone throws a shower FOR you, they are in charge of it.
Ahh....I see! Thank you for showing me the light!
Girl - you say your shower is August 8th? That's plenty of time for your hosts to send out invitations. If you're obsessing over what types of food or theme you want, why don't you just give your hosts a few suggestions, then sit back, zip your mouth, and let them plan it.
BFP#2 ~ 8/2/11, EDD 4/11/12, D&C 9/12/11 at 9w5d
BFP#3 ~ 4/15/12, EDD 12/21/12 ~ DD born 12/22/12
I agree with your friend - you should not be involved other then giving them the list of names and addresses. Your job is to show on 8/8 and appreciate the shower that they choose to throw you.
It is not appropriate to throw your own shower.
hahahaha!
But seriously, no. These people have offered to throw a party in your honor so that you can be showered with gifts. Chill the eff out and let them handle it.
And if they don't, well then they don't. It would be a bummer, but no one owes you a shower.
Um... chill. My invites went out late last week for a party on the Sunday, and almost all the people invited are coming. As well, if it's coed it's probably informal, which makes planning it a breeze, far less effort than I think you are imagining.
As for planning your own, I don't have a problem with it but a LOT of people (from folks on here to your older friends to Ms Manners herself) do, and if you have people doing it for you, calm down and go with the flow.
This exactly. I had 2 friends offer to throw me a shower - they didn't know each other but rather than 2 separate ones, I introduced them and they worked together to plan a joint one. I gave them a guest list and backed off. If you stay out of it you'll enjoy it more because what they decide will be a surprise when you get there!
Yes!
I understand your frustration. This is important to you, you want to feel excited for it, and you don't sound like you completely trust the people who took on the responsibility.
There are polite ways around this problem. If you already know the date/time/location, then you can mention it to people now. Just say that invites will be coming soon, and to call one of your friends with any questions.
Sure, it's possible that your friends might let this fall apart, and you should brace yourself for that. It sucks. It'll probably hurt your feelings. Consider having a "Meet the Baby" party after your LO arrives. If you have a shower, then I'd make sure no one feels obligated to bring gifts. This will work out either way.
It's ungracious to cry and stomp your feet just because you don't get what you want, BUT THAT'S DIFFERENT from being hurt and disappointed about something important to you. Just be careful how you handle it.
This.?
I'm going to blame the hormones for such heated responses to something that would CLEARY upsetting...
I would once again go to your commitee or ask someoene else to and ask you what's going on with the plans because people are asking. In the end no one is going to remember that they didn't have a good time at the "commitee's" shower it will be yours and if the day doesn't go smoothly, no one can expect you to be ok with this.
I know the feeling of wanting to take over becaue I'm in a similar situation, try not to get too frustrated though and enjoy your day when it gets here.
Says moochjones.... I think the name says it all.