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Stay at Home Moms
mandymack
member
There's more to running a household than the chores!!!
mandymack
member
We all know there's a lot more to running a household than just the chores so, let's discuss all the parts of running YOUR home so we can put them in categories!
Help me add to this list below:
1. Household chores and ALL other indoor care
2. Yard maintenance and ALL other outdoor care
3. Car/boat/other vehicle maintenance & repair (including: putting gas in cars, replacing wiper blades, airing up tires, oil changes, mileage check-ups, car washing, etc.)
4. Grocery/toiletry/clothing/home decor/ and all other shopping
5. Meal planning & cooking
6. Dr/Dental/Optometry/Psychiatric and other Medical/Health appointments and Rx refills & pick-up
7. Bill paying/balancing checkbook/investments/taxes/savings/retirement planning/Wills/Insurance/banking and all other Financial Aspects of your home
8. Travel & Holiday planning/research/arrangements & packing
9. Home maintenance & repair (including: researching and booking estimates for any repair in the event that you don't do these things yourself; replacing light bulbs and batteries, carpet cleaning, renovations, childproofing, etc.)
10. Appliance/Electronic repair & purchases (including: computers, kitchen appliances, TVs, cell phones, IPods, exercise equipment, cameras, etc.)
11. Car/boat/motorcycle and other vehicle purchases
12. Personal care appointments (including hair cuts!)
13. Holiday planning/decorating/executing
14. Gift buying (including: birthdays, showers, anniversaries, etc.) for family, friends & co-workers
15. Special occasion planning (including: date night, your anniversary and your child's birthday) & gift buying for you and your family
16. School & extra-curricular activities for the children (including: enrollment, buying supplies, shuttling them to/from, baking/providing for school projects, parent-teacher meetings, payment of dues, etc.)
17. Moving (including: research, booking movers or U-Haul, packing/unpacking, cleaning, utilities set-up/shut-off, address changes, etc.)
18. Garage Sales/Goodwill drop-off/Salvation Army pick-up/Estate Sale
19. Creating & maintaining traditions
20. Shipping and other postal matters (including: buying stamps and packaging supplies, sending birthday/Christmas gifts and returning online purchases)
21. Childcare (including: you SAH, researching daycares/nannies/preschool, staying home when your child is ill, packing the daily diaper bag/lunch, etc.)
22. Pet care (including: feeding, bathing, grooming, vet appointments, cleaning up pet "mess", kenneling or pet-care when away from home, etc.)
23. Creating, maintaining and distributing family newsletters/photo albums/websites/announcements/photos
24. General errands (including: library book returns, dry cleaning, bank deposits/ATM withdrawals, movie/game returns, etc.)
25. Handling legal matters (including: jury duty summons, parking permits, tickets/fines, correspondence with Attorneys and other Professionals, etc.)
eclaire 9.10.06 diggy 6.2.11
This discussion has been closed.
Re: There's more to running a household than the chores!!!
Note to self...don't EVER let DH see this list because I don't do half that stuff!
LOL!!!
It's a collaborative list, not a specific list of things SAHMs do, although I'm sure some do it all!
eclaire 9.10.06 diggy 6.2.11
GREAT ONE! I do this as well and it is a BIG job!
eclaire 9.10.06 diggy 6.2.11
WOW - that's an exhaustive list! Did you come up with this on your own?
I don't know what category this falls in, but I spent an inordinant amount of time trying to get our parking permit, and disputing the various erroneous tickets we were issued while waiting for it shortly after moving.
What about dropoff/pickup drycleaning? (Sorry if you already had this, didn't remember seeing it.)
Library dropoff/pickup?
Childproofing house/car?
I truly cannot think of anything else - I think you got it all!
It IS exhausting, isn't it? Geez, so much to do! It's been discussed from time to time about all that we do as moms and how much we are all in-charge of as part of SAH so, I thought I'd make a list of everything I could think of that comes with running a home and caring for kids so that we could discuss them further in detail about who does what in YOUR home. Your suggestions are great!!!
Maybe a general category for errands that would encompass dry cleaning or would that be better under household chores, sort of like laundry?
Childproofing is a GREAT ONE, a big one! Hmmm... maybe part of childcare? Home maintenance? A separate category?
eclaire 9.10.06 diggy 6.2.11
Wow! That sounds good to me.
I know it is a comphrensive effort to run a home---but it's something to see it actually written out! :-)
Exactly why I wanted to do it - especially when we all talk about the division of labor in our homes, which is a common topic around here! I bet we (and possibly our hubbies!) do a lot more than we think we do and/or receive credit for!
eclaire 9.10.06 diggy 6.2.11
1. Household chores and ALL other indoor care - but this is what every adult does all the time. This is not "running a a household"
2. Yard maintenance and ALL other outdoor care - same for this, but for many of us there is no backyard so it is no issue.
3. Car/boat/other vehicle maintenance & repair - this is a cateogry? I thought it was just something each adult did as it arose.
4. Grocery/toiletry/clothing/home decor/ and all other shopping - ok this counts.
5. Meal planning & cooking - MEAL PLANNING? I just buy the fresh groceries and cook with them. It isn't that hard. it doesn't take planning.
6. Dr/Dental/Optometry/Psychiatric and other Medical/Health appointments and Rx refills & pick-up - Huh? This is often enough to warrant a category? Are you all really sick?
7. Bill paying/balancing checkbook/investments/taxes/savings/retirement planning/Wills/Insurance/banking and all other Financial Aspects of your home - HUH? We see a tax agent once a year for 40 mins and bring our end of year pay summaries. End of story.
8. Travel & Holiday planning/research/arrangements & packing - WTF?? Do you run a nanny service for yuppies?
9. Home maintenance & repair (including: researching and booking estimates for any repair in the event that you don't do these things yourself; replacing light bulbs and batteries, carpet cleaning, renovations, childproofing, etc.) - Yeah I do this as needed, like once a year, maybe. Hardly a category.
10. Appliance/Electronic repair & purchases (including: computers, kitchen appliances, TVs, cell phones, IPods, exercise equipment, cameras, etc.) - WHAAAAT? Again, what are you doing to them, throwing them against the wall?
11. Car/boat/motorcycle and other vehicle purchases - you do this more than once every 10 years?
12. Personal care appointments (including hair cuts!) - Something everyone can do for themselves TYVM!
13. Holiday planning/decorating/executing - I love executing. This is such shyte.
14. Gift buying (including: birthdays, showers, anniversaries, etc.) for family, friends & co-workers.. - again, this is life not chores.
15. Special occasion planning (including: date night, your anniversary and your child's birthday) & gift buying for you and your family - ditto
16. School & extra-curricular activities for the children (including: enrollment, buying supplies, shuttling them to/from, baking/providing for school projects, parent-teacher meetings, payment of dues, etc.) - this is what a once a year thing? This is not a category.
17. Moving (including: research, booking movers or U-Haul, packing/unpacking, cleaning, utilities set-up/shut-off, address changes, etc.) - You're kidding me.
18. Garage Sales/Goodwill drop-off/Salvation Army pick-up/Estate Sale - If its a chore skip it.
19. Creating & maintaining traditions - OMFG.
20. Shipping and other postal matters (including: buying stamps and packaging supplies, sending birthday/Christmas gifts and returning online purchases) - are you writing a constitution or running a small country?
21. Childcare (including: you SAH, researching daycares/nannies/preschool, staying home when your child is ill, packing the daily diaper bag/lunch, etc.) I must remember to ask for credit for packing a diaper bag in 5 seconds each morning.
22. Pet care (including: feeding, bathing, grooming, vet appointments, cleaning up pet "mess", kenneling or pet-care when away from home, etc.) - easy - don't get the smelly pet.
23. Creating, maintaining and distributing family newsletters/photo albums/websites/announcements/photos - Ah, you're THAT kind of person. That explains it. I only get these from crazy family members.
24. General errands (including: library book returns, dry cleaning, bank deposits/ATM withdrawals, movie/game returns, etc.) - you mean, like, life. Like what we all did without thinking it was worth mentioning when we were working?
25. Handling legal matters (including: jury duty summons, parking permits, tickets/fines, correspondence with Attorneys and other Professionals, etc.) Are you Mrs De Winter?
I think this list gives SAHMs a bad name. most of it doesn't need to be done at all, most of the rest needs being done OCCASIONALLY, or by only some families (who have a car, boat, dog or whatever). And most of it is quite easily t he responsibility of each individual adult (or older child) in the house. There is nothing that makes this SAHM work.
It proves to me that SAHMs really do make their own work up.
I don't say looking after a kid at home is easy, I found it very hard. But that has nothing to do with all this shyte. This has nothing whatever to do with SAHMs, its just called living as an adult. If you think your job is to do all these things then God help you. You made a rod for your own back.
lol, Debbie Downer has entered the building!
MMML, SAH is what you put into it. For some of us, it's not just childcare but it's a lifestyle choice... yes, running a household the way my husband and I prefer IS work but it's a great job, IMO. I'd prefer to take care of all of the tasks that Mrs. Shavers listed so my husband can come home and we can relax as a family. It might not be as important as a big career in your opinion, but to some of us, it is!
Is it a Downer to say that I think this actually DAMAGES women's rights. If we start painting normal adult life as a "job" that we should get recognition for we are painting ourselves as very inferior.
My DH did all those things AND a FT job no sweat before we met. So did I. And after we had a child and I was working FT then - we did all those that aren't just made up and looked after a child while both working FT.
In other words, either they're ridiculously easy and shouldn't be on the list or they're not actually necessary.
Has nothing t o do with not valuing SAHMs. I *am* a SAHM, I value SAHMs as the hardest job there is. But this is make-work, pure and simple. And it belittles women to call it work.
Yeah that. A LOT! I still haven't purchased wedding gifts for two of his friends that were married over a year and a half ago.
DH and I share chores pretty evenly, and we divvy up the household responsibilities according to convenience. His office has a bank, post office, dry cleaner within a couple of blocks. DD and I do the shopping, gift buying, etc when we're out during the day. I do think a lot of the things on this list are just part of normal adult life, you find a way to fit them in whether you have a kid or not.
I'm going to copy this list for us Working Moms. Only I'll add #26. Go to work for 45 hours each week.
I'm not saying being a SAHM isn't hard work. Cause it is. I did it for 8 months. Had to go back to work to pay the bills & health insurance for my family. I didn't kid myself though. I knew that once I went back to work all those things I did when I was home still had to get done.
Exactly. Particularly when you follow it up with talk about SAHMs deserving a huge salary for it.
lol, what?! I think the list was just a fun thing for fellow SAHMs to discuss... no need to look so deep into it. It's just a topic of conversation, relax!
I am curious: why do you feel the need to make a list like this? I do all of those things too plus go to grad school plus work full time.
I am not saying that SAHM is an easy job. In fact I admire people who do it, because they are lucky enough to e able to do it, I cannot and I am very upset leaving my girls every morning, but I know it is a choice i made and I don't need to justify myself by for example listing how many hours per day I spend cleaning/cooking.working/studying.?
Ditto. Try working over 40 hours a week AND doing all the stuff on the list. So we should get paid double!
As usual, people read a post, judge it and reply without reading all the replies and without giving any thought to WHAT the post might actually be about. I repeat: IT'S A COLLABORATIVE LIST, NOT A SPECIFIC LIST OF THINGS SAHM'S DO.
And just to add something that obviously wasn't assumed, this was never a SAHM vs. WOHM list, that's why it's called a list about running a household NOT something like "Jobs of a SAHM". Everyone here knows that working parents have this list ontop of their careers, this was just a follow up post about the Division of Labor around the household that we often have on this board... nothing more.eclaire 9.10.06 diggy 6.2.11
I dont think it's a debate. I think the whole thing is funny. It comes out like people who work dont do these things. Like we go to work, come home and sit on our a$$ the rest of the time. LOL!
Dont get me wrong, taking care of children is hard work in itself and I am not trying to put down SAHM's by any means, it's just the simple fact that she had the "time" to write down all that stuff that is a normal part of everyday life.
Hold up...wait a sec. You mean the list isn't a joke?
The list wasn't meant to pertain only to SAHMs.
And making a comment like "she had the "time" to write down all that stuff" is making a dig at SAHMs.
Nothing at all against being a SAHM - but do you seriously think that working moms don't have to do everything you just mentioned on your list?
It's tough being a grown up.
This list of running a household has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with whether you work, SAH, go to school, are a single parent, don't have kids or do a combination of the above, which I have pointed out in 2 additional replies already.
This post was a prequel to a future post I was going to do about the general division of labor around your household between YOU and YOUR PARTNER (your answer would obviously be: 100% if you are a single person household!) as discussions about who does what in your home is a frequent topic around here and it has NOTHING to do with whether you work or not.
eclaire 9.10.06 diggy 6.2.11
Mrs. Shavers, I think everyone who frequents the board understood where you were coming from with this, since it is a frequent topic.
And you got the board moving a little bit
ditto.. it's really not that controversial, IMO!
Wow, looks like some of the working mom's on here don't know how to read. Scary.