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Babies: 0 - 3 Months
seriously, i need to vent.
I really wanted to go to the philly flower show this week with anyone, too hectic to do by myself with C. ?Since none of my friends can make it as they are all working, H said he would go tonight with me. ?It's a huge event at the Convention Center downtown, and it is far less crowded at night. ?My parents offered to watch C while we were there. ?However, H and I decided that we would take C anyway and have a nice time as a family. ?
So I call my mom, tell her that I don't need her to come down (and in all honesty, it's not fair to her to always have to be my crutch) and she starts lecturing me about how it's unfair to C and he should be sleeping in his crib. ?She ends her lecture with "Don't you want to put him first?" ?Um, yes, I do want to put him first, but I need to get over this anxiety I've developed and just go... and realize that I can do this. ?Yes, it's better for him to be sleeping in his crib, but are 2 hours in his car seat or baby bjorn going to kill him? ?No.
As much as I need help, I really don't need it sometimes. ?If that makes any sense. ?Ugh. ?I just end up feeling pressured to do things that I don't want to do and then I end up making everyone else happy but myself. ?I mean, is this a seriously selfish thing to do??
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Re: seriously, i need to vent.
No it is not selfish! Your mom needs to step it down a couple of notches it sounds like. His schedule might be thrown off a little bit, but he will be fine. There is nothing wrong with taking him out after his bed time, its not like he will explode lol! It will be fine, go have fun at your flower show and don't worry about it.
I think your mom was just looking forward to babysitting and got upset when she wasn't.
How have you been doing with the PPD stuff? Comments like that from your mom can NOT be helping your mental state. I know I judge myself harshly enough without needing to have those doubts reinforced by other people.
Have you talked to her about how you're coping?
this. i mean its one night. he won't even notice.
He is 2 months old, not 6 with school the next day. My DD is 2.75 and sometimes we keep her out until 10:00 at night when we go to friends houses on weekends.
Go have fun. I heard that is a really good flower show.
i don't think you are selfish. my MIL gives me the same guilt trip (though she says it much nicer) about taking J places sometimes. this weekend we are going to dinner with friends and i get pressure EVERY. DAY. about how i should leave him home and she wants to babysit etc.
i think sometimes grandmas get a little over excited and forget where boundries should be. i know what you mean about the anxiety over it...i am feeling the same way over dinner this weekend but i am making myself take the baby so that i can start to feel normal about it all. *HUGS* you take the baby, have fun, and get some pictures of your family outing.!
exactly.. your'e the mommy, and you do what you want.. just like you said, he will be fine for a couple hours or so in the car seat/carrier.. Its also a good thing to get the baby out and about sometimes
Sarah - 12/23/2008
Alex - 9/30/2011
"I say embrace the total geek in yourself and just enjoy it. Life is too short to be cool." - Shirley Manson, Garbage
It's hard when your mom says stuff like that especially when you love and respect her so much. They are not always right though. You're the mom and you know what's best for you and your family.