My feelings are hurt.

AlwysAwsm · February 2009

Yesterday my mom took me out maternity clothes shopping for my birthday. I got a lot of cute stuff from Motherhood that were really comfy and looked nice on me.

Well today I got home and my husband came right out and said that my shirt is really ugly. My mouth just dropped in shock because I thought I looked really cute today for being pregnant. I then told him that I'm PREGNANT! nothing looks nice on me. He said... oh, thats for sure... and walked away.

A little later I said how I feel he has no attraction to me. He said that I wouldn't be attracted to him either if he had a huge gut.

So I just walked upstairs and I cried for a bit. =(

No wonder why I'm insecure and have low self esteem.

Adriamichelle83 · February 2009

Wow...what a douche!!!

That's your CHILD that is making that 'gut'!!!

Mama Jan · February 2009

Wow, I'm so sorry he was such a jerk to you! I truly hope he's just had a bad day and that this isn't his normal attitude. If this is who he is, I really worry for you and for your babies. He has the power to build up or to break down - he needs to man up and realize that.

Hugs to you and I'm sure you are beautiful! It's hard to feel that way, especially when pregnant but you need to be told that. You are.

Mama Angelina · February 2009

OK girls we're gonna do a team THROAT PUNCH. Let us at him!

No, in all seriousness sweetie you need to sit him down and tell him why that is entirely unacceptable. That is borderline emotional abuse. Please do what you can to tell him how you feel and expect a decent apology and a commitment to not put you down like that again. If that doesn't help or you need support please get some couples counseling. I'm sorry. ((hugs))

Bernadette5 · February 2009

He's a douche and owes you an apology!! My husband would never say that to me.

kirplnk · February 2009

I'm hoping he had a bad day or was male PMSing. That is a horrible thing to say to any woman....let alone someone who is pregnant. Just remember that pregnant women are regarded around the world as being some of the MOST BEAUTIFUL. Remind him of that if he needs a little prodding. Don't let him get you down during this amazing time. Pregnancy is so short and you need to savor every moment because all too soon it will be over.

lhull · February 2009

I would kick him in the balls! Thats rude!! Men seriously need to get a clue!

thejenni · February 2009

What a jerk face. You should remind him that you are making his child. My husband tells me he loves my bump cause it means he gets to be a daddy again. I don't know if he's serious, but he knows not to mess with the pregnant lady. I hope your husband wasn't being serious and just in a mood

Im sending a big elbowsmash his way for making you cry!

AlwysAwsm · February 2009

And this was the shirt I was wearing.

https://www.motherhood.com/Product.asp?ViewSource=&Product_Id=954500013&category_Name=Long+Sleeve&Category_Id=0013&MasterCategory_Id=MC2

Maryjane9711 · February 2009

I just cannot believe that! I am so sorry! I am sure you look adorable!! Is he usually like that or did he maybe just have a bad day (not that it would be an excuse if he did). But if that is the case maybe try waiting a day or two until he is in a better mood to discuss how that made you feel. If he is usually like that I would suggest couples counseling or something so that maybe a third party could help him realize that that is not acceptable behavior!!!

CalinsBride · February 2009

I really don't understand how you allow this person to talk to you this way--period. You do not have a "gut", you have a beautiful, lush pregnant belly that is full of LIFE. It truly breaks my heart when I hear the way your husband treats you. It actually hurts me. It sounds like he completely takes for granted the fact that you love him and will always be there. Some men like to put down their wives so that they feel so bad about themselves that they feel like if they were to leave them, they wouldn't be able to find someone better.

If you have a daughter, is this the person you want teaching her how to love herself? If you have a son, do you want him to think that this is the way he is supposed to talk to women? I really, really hope you will consider talking to a professional about all of this. (Not with your husband--on your own). You are better than this,and this emotional abuse needs to stop NOW.

sherpa · February 2009

Was he joking? ?What a ***. ?I'd punch DH in the balls for saying something like that. ?If he so much as gives me a sideways glance right now he knows he'll get a swift smack in the sack next time I catch him off guard.

eclipsed823 · February 2009

That shirt is cute and your husband is acting like a douche nozzle

AshNicole331 · February 2009

That is absolutely NOT okay to say, pregnant or not. Honestly, I can't believe you stood there and took it. It's completely unacceptable and you should definitely have a talk with him about this.

If I may ask, was this a planned pregnancy?

margeincharge2 · February 2009

Oh hun, I'm almost crying reading your post! I can only imagine how I would feel if DH said that to me. I mean, heck, my DH still was attracted to me when I gained 40 lbs a few years ago (not pg related). I don't know what I would do/say if he said something like that to me when I was pg.

I don't know that I have any advice other than to talk to him about it. Although it should be evident, let him know what an asshat he is being.

hairstylist720 · February 2009

Wow! What an ass! If my husband said that to me I would be SO pissed. You deserve better than that, I'm sure you look beautiful!!!!!

beth thacker · February 2009

awe! He sounds like my stupid FI. Make him sleep on the couch tonight. Thats what I did. My FI woke up with his back hurting and apologized. Men can be big douche bags at times.

Tinkermeg · February 2009

1- that shirt is awesome...I have one in pink just like it.

2- That is unacceptable that he would say something like that to you. I told my DH that I felt ugly and he felt so bad he goes out of his way to try to reassure me. Hopefully he was just being an a$$hole today and this is not a regular occurrance. If he always talks to you like this, you really deserve better.

ashleynicole_65802 · February 2009

that's horrible! i'm so sorry he said that to you. you are carrying his child, he has no right to break you down like that. i would punch my husband if he said anything like that to me. i know it's hard but just try to remember you are creating a life inside of you and that is beautiful! and i think the shirt is cute btw.

somethingchangd · February 2009

I thought you'd decided that you were better off without him? I gotta say, every post you make just confirms that feeling...

jolis_petits_bijoux · February 2009

AlwysAwsm:

Yesterday my mom took me out maternity clothes shopping for my birthday. I got a lot of cute stuff from Motherhood that were really comfy and looked nice on me.

Well today I got home and my husband came right out and said that my shirt is really ugly. My mouth just dropped in shock because I thought I looked really cute today for being pregnant. I then told him that I'm PREGNANT! nothing looks nice on me. He said... oh, thats for sure... and walked away.

A little later I said how I feel he has no attraction to me. He said that I wouldn't be attracted to him either if he had a huge gut.

So I just walked upstairs and I cried for a bit. =(

No wonder why I'm insecure and have low self esteem.

Can I come over and seriously beat the crap out of your DH? He is being an asshat!

Tell him that you're PREGNANT - that's his child growing inside you, it should be the most beautiful thing in the WORLD to him! And, if you can get a little biitchy like me, tell him that he's softened up a bit and you're not so attracted to him anymore - then ask him what HIS excuse is.

monicalynn1979 · February 2009

I want to slap him for you! I'm sorry he made you cry

If I were you I would stand up to him and let him know that is not acceptable. If he doesn't have something nice to say he should keep his mouth shut! This is a very vulnerable, emotional time for you and he should be supporting you and making you feel beautiful. Hopefully he was just having a bad day and will apologize when he realizes how hurtful he was.

Mary0913 · February 2009

Wow. I am so sorry that he made you feel bad. You should, in no way, feel bad about yourself! You are growing a baby and are undoubtedly (sp) adorable!!

Lolita0626 · February 2009

That shirt is so cute! I don't understand what would possess him to speak to you that way - but it is completely unacceptable. He should be grateful that you are nourishing and growing a beautiful baby for him. You deserve SO much better than to be treated that way.

CalinsBride · February 2009

somethingchangd:
I thought you'd decided that you were better off without him? I gotta say, every post you make just confirms that feeling...

I'm glad I'm not the only one who has noticed this. It seriously makes me worried for the OP. He is not good for you.

MrsSchoon04 · February 2009

He obviously said that to be mean and hurtful which is unacceptable and inexcusable...pregnant or not! I would not put up with that crap for half a second. I would have called him out so fast.

Chrysallys · February 2009

somethingchangd:
I thought you'd decided that you were better off without him? I gotta say, every post you make just confirms that feeling...

Ditto!

And here I thought maybe you kicked him to the curb for the last time he spoke to you in such a manner. I know how hard it is to leave, I've been there with my ex-H, but this has gone on too long. And honestly I don't know how many times you need to hear people tell you that. You deserve better, now do something about it!

ChiOmegaGirl · February 2009

I don't have anything new to add that these fabulous ladies haven't already said, but I just want to make sure that you know that that is NOT an okay thing for him to say to you. You are making a person - his child, and you have 9 millions things going through your head, and you deserve nothing less than his support and love. If he's going to act like an asshat than he can sleep on the couch. I love that shirt (I think I have it in mauve) and I hate that you feel like less than a queen. I know he's your husband, but he's a rude moron. Please don't let anyone treat you like that.

HisLobster · February 2009

somethingchangd:
I thought you'd decided that you were better off without him? I gotta say, every post you make just confirms that feeling...

This.

somethingchangd · February 2009

Oh, and don't for a second think it's about the shirt. This has nothing to do with a shirt or even how you look. This is a manipulation of your emotions in an attempt to gain control (and to make you even more insecure than you already are). It's so not about the shirt.

How are you going to feel when he tells your baby s/he is stupid because s/he skipped "K" when singing the alphabet? Do you want your baby to suffer the same abuse? Because I guarantee you that's where this is going.

I'm not trying to be snarky or rude (really, I'm not) but it seems like you need someone to tell you how it is and how it's going to be. He's not going to get better. It's not going to get better. You need to do something to fix your situation and since you can't control him and his behavior all your can do is control your own. And leave.

AshNicole331 · February 2009

somethingchangd:
Oh, and don't for a second think it's about the shirt. This has nothing to do with a shirt or even how you look. This is a manipulation of your emotions in an attempt to gain control (and to make you even more insecure than you already are). It's so not about the shirt.

How are you going to feel when he tells your baby s/he is stupid because s/he skipped "K" when singing the alphabet? Do you want your baby to suffer the same abuse? Because I guarantee you that's where this is going.

I'm not trying to be snarky or rude (really, I'm not) but it seems like you need someone to tell you how it is and how it's going to be. He's not going to get better. It's not going to get better. You need to do something to fix your situation and since you can't control him and his behavior all your can do is control your own. And leave.

Couldn't agree more!

A lot of these girls are calling him an asshat, douche, etc...I think he's way worse. My annoying coworker is an asshat. Your husband is a fvcking diickhead and a horrible excuse for a man.

liongish119 · February 2009

What a f*ckin' a-hole! Tell him that he has to spend the rest of the pg apologizing to you and doing whatever you say.

This is assuming that he isn't normally like this. If he is, I agree with the girls who say you should reconsider being with this guy.

JennifernKevin4ever · February 2009

If my guy said that to me I would of kicked him to the curb! You do not need to be treated this way. You are carrying his child. I am sorry he treated you like this. Guys like that I wish I could punch in the face.

InLove24 · February 2009

I'm sorry!!! I can't believe he said that to you!!

Chrysallys · February 2009

liongish119:

What a f*ckin' a-hole! Tell him that he has to spend the rest of the pg apologizing to you and doing whatever you say.

This is assuming that he isn't normally like this. If he is, I agree with the girls who say you should reconsider being with this guy.

Going by all her posts about him, he is normally like this.

NorBryDE · February 2009

like pp said, talk to him. if that doesn't work, show him this thread and show him how it's obviously wrong b/c we're all heated!

sorry, your husband gets the captain d-bag award tonight. i'll tell my husband to send it his way!! Stick out tongue

Lolita0626 · February 2009

somethingchangd:
Oh, and don't for a second think it's about the shirt. This has nothing to do with a shirt or even how you look. This is a manipulation of your emotions in an attempt to gain control (and to make you even more insecure than you already are). It's so not about the shirt.

How are you going to feel when he tells your baby s/he is stupid because s/he skipped "K" when singing the alphabet? Do you want your baby to suffer the same abuse? Because I guarantee you that's where this is going.

I'm not trying to be snarky or rude (really, I'm not) but it seems like you need someone to tell you how it is and how it's going to be. He's not going to get better. It's not going to get better. You need to do something to fix your situation and since you can't control him and his behavior all your can do is control your own. And leave.

I completely agree.

mommy411 · February 2009

Ditto you do not derserve to be disrespected like that and you need to seriously tell him..If he doesnt man up and stop verbally abusing you then He doesnt deserve you!?

Then kick him in the balls REALLY hard and tell him his Balls stink!?

Mrs.DeliaMarieP · February 2009

First, I am so sorry that he behaved that way.

In the words of my husband, "It takes a special brand of douchebag to say something like that."

He'd be sleeping outside for that one...

Pesky · February 2009

somethingchangd:

Oh, and don't for a second think it's about the shirt. This has nothing to do with a shirt or even how you look. This is a manipulation of your emotions in an attempt to gain control (and to make you even more insecure than you already are). It's so not about the shirt.

How are you going to feel when he tells your baby s/he is stupid because s/he skipped "K" when singing the alphabet? Do you want your baby to suffer the same abuse? Because I guarantee you that's where this is going.

I'm not trying to be snarky or rude (really, I'm not) but it seems like you need someone to tell you how it is and how it's going to be. He's not going to get better. It's not going to get better. You need to do something to fix your situation and since you can't control him and his behavior all your can do is control your own. And leave.

ITA. The shirt is awesome (seriously). Your H though is an emotionally abusive jackass. And literally abusive -- look up what abusers do and from your posts, he fits the profile (controlling, negative, tears you down to rely solely on him, etc.). Do you really want to send a message to your DC on the way that putting up with this crap is okay? And that DC needs to deal with this as well? Totally reminds me of the jerk husband in the movie Waitress. You need to get counseling for yourself stat to help figure out whether you need this toxic abusive person in your life.

emaria · February 2009

wow. i should go kiss my husband lol...

he sounds like a prick and i hope he gets over himself quickly. i'm sure you're gorgeous and if he isn't mature enough to handle your pregnancy then he really needs to get his butt in gear to have a fraction of the maturity necessary to raise a child.

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