Stay at Home Moms

How long sahm?

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Re: How long sahm?

  • He's 2.5.

    He's high needs now, and autism has been thrown around by his doctors and therapists a couple times but there is no diagnosis yet. I guess it depends on what our life looks like in a few years. If it's still consistent engagement/therapy/behavioral problems, then I'll likely continue to SAH. If he "grows out" of the things we're struggling with, I'll probably work PT.

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  • My kids are 19, 5 and 11 months.  Originally, the plan was that once the younger two are in school full-time, I would find something part-time, 2 or 3 days a week and be here when they get home from school.  

    My brother and his wife are expecting and about 6 months ago, asked if I would be interested in watching the baby and offered to pay me.  I said yes.  My brother informed me a couple of weeks ago that they are talking about having at least one (possibly two) additional children and they'd like me to watch them too, if I'm interested.  I will likely say yes. That will delay the plans that DH and I had for me to get a part-time job, but I'm ok with that.  I still get to be here when the boys get home from school and I'll be making some money...which was what we really wanted anyway.

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  • 13 months. I would love to start working part time as soon as he is weaned from all of his daytime feedings. Not sure when that will be, as we have only been able to drop one feeding so far. Two more to go.
  • For those of you not planning on returning until all your kids are in school, are you concerned with not being able to find a job bc of the length of time you have been out of work?
  • imagecjcouple:
    Wow, I am shocked that some have no plans to ever go back to work. What will you do the last 20 to 30 years of your life? When my youngest hits college I will only be 51.

    Well, hobbies, travel, relax, play with my grandchildren, volunteer. All the things retired people do! 

  • imagecjcouple:
    Wow, I am shocked that some have no plans to ever go back to work. What will you do the last 20 to 30 years of your life? When my youngest hits college I will only be 51.

    sleep!!!! :)

     

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  • 5 yrs and 3 yrs-- dont plan to work
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  • imagecjcouple:
    Wow, I am shocked that some have no plans to ever go back to work. What will you do the last 20 to 30 years of your life? When my youngest hits college I will only be 51.

    I am 40 and DH Is turning 50 next year. DS is 3. I will be 55 when he graduates high school. 

    I plan to stay home forever. What do you do when the kid needs picked up early from school because he is sick, summers, etc. DH can't stay home from work so it is up to me.  

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  • DS1 is 5, DS2 is 2.5. I was SAH for 4+ years, and started teaching again (part-time) this past school year.

    I'm hoping to get another teaching gig this fall (got laid off due to budget cuts). In an ideal world, I would be able to work 2-3 full days and be home the rest of the week. I planned it this way, didn't want to SAH forever.

    DS1 - Feb 2008

    DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)

  • imagecjcouple:
    Wow, I am shocked that some have no plans to ever go back to work. What will you do the last 20 to 30 years of your life? When my youngest hits college I will only be 51.

    It's really surprising to me, to. I really cannot imagine not contributing in some way to the household after my kid(s) are grown and out of the house. It would not be fulfilling to me at all to lounge around, shop, go out to eat, and read all day, which is pretty much what I would do if I had no job and no kids. I'm looking forward to retiring early and traveling and doing a lot of stuff - but with H, not by myself all day while he works hard.

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  • imagecjcouple:
    Wow, I am shocked that some have no plans to ever go back to work. What will you do the last 20 to 30 years of your life? When my youngest hits college I will only be 51.

    It's really surprising to me, to. I really cannot imagine not contributing in some way to the household after my kid(s) are grown and out of the house. It would not be fulfilling to me at all to lounge around, shop, go out to eat, and read all day, which is pretty much what I would do if I had no job and no kids. I'm looking forward to retiring early and traveling and doing a lot of stuff - but with H, not by myself all day while he works hard.

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  • Dd is 3 and I'm due in sept with number 2. DH and I both agree that ilI probably never return to work.... There are summers, sick days, holidays that they will need care after they start school, not to mention all of the fun school activities and field trips I can be a part of. We could obviously hire someone to care for them on those days, but me being at home works for us.

    J+E ~ 08/25/2007   DD#1 ~ 05/11/2010   DD#2 ~ 09/25/2013   DD#3 ~ 06/09/2016   Baby #4 Due ~ 01/16/2023

  • imageKateMW:

    imageHav=Fath:
    I have to say I'm surprised that so many are not planning on going back to work. I think its' awesome, just surprised.

    I find it crazier that most people plan on going back to work when their kids hit K/grade school. My life is so much busier with DD the older she gets. This is no way I could work a meaningful job nowadays.  

    Your DH also makes a good income in a LCOL state. My DH makes an okay income in a HCOL state. The biggest reason I even SAH now is because financially daycare doesn't make sense, particularly once we have another child. Once they're in school and don't need FT daycare then I won't be working just to pay for child care.

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  • DS is 9 months, and I don't plan on going back to work anytime soon or at all. I'd be going back to school first, and that's time I don't have.
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  • imagechardonnay24:

    imagecjcouple:
    Wow, I am shocked that some have no plans to ever go back to work. What will you do the last 20 to 30 years of your life? When my youngest hits college I will only be 51.

    It's really surprising to me, to. I really cannot imagine not contributing in some way to the household after my kid(s) are grown and out of the house. It would not be fulfilling to me at all to lounge around, shop, go out to eat, and read all day, which is pretty much what I would do if I had no job and no kids. I'm looking forward to retiring early and traveling and doing a lot of stuff - but with H, not by myself all day while he works hard.

    BTW, saying you are not contributing to your household then is like saying you're not contributing now. Which is completely wrong as we all know. I hope that we can all come back and have this same conversation when you all have school aged children.  

  • imagecjcouple:
    imageFashiongal1973:

    imagecjcouple:
    Wow, I am shocked that some have no plans to ever go back to work. What will you do the last 20 to 30 years of your life? When my youngest hits college I will only be 51.

    I am 40 and DH Is turning 50 next year. DS is 3. I will be 55 when he graduates high school. 

    I plan to stay home forever. What do you do when the kid needs picked up early from school because he is sick, summers, etc. DH can't stay home from work so it is up to me.  

    Ummm. You do what is necessary regardless of employment status. Personally I don't care what you do with your life. I just commented how surprised I am that so many ppl plan to never work again. I can't imagine. I can definitely see volunteer work filling that void and it is very fulfilling and a great life to have but hobbies, acting retired at 50?? Not for me. I plan never to act like an old lady. Lol

    I guess I knew when I quit to have DD that I wouldn't ever go back to cooking. It's not a job you really do as a parent. Especially with a DH who has a schedule like mine does. Also, do you not have hobbies now? I don't think I act like an old lady just because I have hobbies! 

  • BTW, fwiw, I'm not so worried about sick days, summers, etc. DD had lots of activities and I have interests that I want to take up, so I have tons to do since she's been in school. And the bottom line is that what I did before a child is not possible now and I don't get working just for workings sake. I think that's silly. I don't feel the need to contribute financially just to prove my worth. We don't need it, though if we did that would be a completely different thing.
  • imageKateMW:
    imagechardonnay24:

    imagecjcouple:
    Wow, I am shocked that some have no plans to ever go back to work. What will you do the last 20 to 30 years of your life? When my youngest hits college I will only be 51.

    It's really surprising to me, to. I really cannot imagine not contributing in some way to the household after my kid(s) are grown and out of the house. It would not be fulfilling to me at all to lounge around, shop, go out to eat, and read all day, which is pretty much what I would do if I had no job and no kids. I'm looking forward to retiring early and traveling and doing a lot of stuff - but with H, not by myself all day while he works hard.

    BTW, saying you are not contributing to your household then is like saying you're not contributing now. Which is completely wrong as we all know. I hope that we can all come back and have this same conversation when you all have school aged children.  

    No, no. I'm saying I would not be contributing. Because I hate housework and cooking, and truly only SAH because I have a special needs kid and my career never really took off before I got pregnant. If I were to stay home after my kids were out of the house, I really wouldn't contribute. I'd continue to have my cleaning lady and hire out as much as possible. I don't enjoy domestic stuff, and I'd feel bad if H was working all day while I did what I liked to do, which is shop, get massages, and go out to lunch with friends. Not saying that it isn't possible to contribute, just that I definitely would not be in that scenario.

     

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  • imageKateMW:
    imagecjcouple:
    imageFashiongal1973:

    imagecjcouple:
    Wow, I am shocked that some have no plans to ever go back to work. What will you do the last 20 to 30 years of your life? When my youngest hits college I will only be 51.

    I am 40 and DH Is turning 50 next year. DS is 3. I will be 55 when he graduates high school. 

    I plan to stay home forever. What do you do when the kid needs picked up early from school because he is sick, summers, etc. DH can't stay home from work so it is up to me.  

    Ummm. You do what is necessary regardless of employment status. Personally I don't care what you do with your life. I just commented how surprised I am that so many ppl plan to never work again. I can't imagine. I can definitely see volunteer work filling that void and it is very fulfilling and a great life to have but hobbies, acting retired at 50?? Not for me. I plan never to act like an old lady. Lol

    I guess I knew when I quit to have DD that I wouldn't ever go back to cooking. It's not a job you really do as a parent. Especially with a DH who has a schedule like mine does. Also, do you not have hobbies now? I don't think I act like an old lady just because I have hobbies! 

    ditto. I don't plan to ever work again but I don't ever plan to act like an old lady either! 

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  • 7 months and sometime after the kids, we want 4, are older and in school full time. But we will see how things work out
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