The nights are hard...

Dixon813

Yesterday just sucked! I know, that we're going to have difficult days, and those days aren't necessarily going to go away, but yesterday just really sucked.

DH went back to work (I'm a teacher so I'm off for the summer) and when he comes home he's stressed with work and with grieving.  I seem to be feeling/doing OK during the day, but in the evening I get tired (I lost a lot of blood and had to do 2 transfusions) and can't hold back the tears.

I know there are no magic answers - just needed a place to vent...

fluttergirlmoonchild79

***SIGGY WARNING***

 

I think it's hard for most if not all of us when DH goes back to work especially if we don't (I was still on maternity leave so DH went back to work well before I did - and I work from home so "going" to work doesn't mean the same thing it does to most people).  I found that keeping busy -whether it's during the day or evening - with anything (reading, playing games on my phone or computer, cross-stitching etc.)  I found that if I could keep my mind occupied, it couldn't wander.

Having said that, the night time is still the toughest time for me.  I still, even 18 months out have nights where I cry myself to sleep.  I've found that watching TV and falling asleep while it's still on helps.  Most TVs have a timer you can set so I'd set it for like 90-120 minutes.   This way I wasn't thinking when I fell asleep.

Noethola

I agree that nights are the hardest. Its as if all your barriers break down, and you are left naked before the dark world. It helps me a little bit to have a bear (we call it the Elsie bear.) When either of us are really having a hard time, we grab the bear. It simply gives us something to hold onto at night. 

I also do my best to just keep busy. I found a few new hobbies and threw myself into those. Mindless activity is good, as Flutter mentioned above. 

shandorfml2

So sorry sweetie. H doing back to work is hard (((hugs))))

weddedwife

Yes, I understand. I'm 19 month out and still, my worst moments are late at night. When I am tired, I just can't handle my emotions as well. I'm able to recognize this tendency now, however.