s/o FB stalking

amyc216

My friend and I were talking how it's just not normal to be able to check in on your ex-boyfriends at any time- see who they married, kids, what their house looks like, etc, but with FB you can!  Who do you stalk on FB? 

I guess this is my FFFC- I like to look at MH's ex-girlfriends and compare myself to them.  For the most part, when I look at my ex-boyfriends they all look worse than they used to and I don't feel sad that I didn't end up with any of them. 

Fianschneid

I FB stalk my ex-best friend. Our friendship of 15 years ended badly because of some shady stuff she was doing four years ago. I still like to check in to watch her life fall apart

colliebabe

I mentioned looking up the guy who chose another girl over me in FFFC. His loss, totally.

I dated this cute grad student while I was in college (undergrad.)  He was my physics tutor.  He doesn't have FB so I googled him and found a video of him (he was explaining how he designed a special pair of running shoes.) Anyway, it got me wondering if he is married or has kids or anything, and almost wishing he did have FB so I could stalk him.

MH doesn't have FB and I don't know any of his ex-GFs.

BeesMomma00

I am FB friends with my first great love...  He was so hot in HS and such a nice guy.  We dated until we were juniors in college, went to the same school too. FWIW, his wife is scary looking.  She also went to our college. 

I definitely upgraded with MH.  One of the advantages of meeting a guy after 30 is that they don't change that much from then on.  They just get older.

 

rubysue267

I am sort of terrified to FB stalk anyone from my ~past~. I'm super paranoid and afraid that I'll accidentally click something on their profile or that they'll somehow know that I've been looking at their page. I just don't trust that any of that is fully anonymous.

That said, sometimes I'll sneak a peek at my BIL's ex girlfriend because a.) I don't care if she ever found out and b.) she is a swirling stew of crazy and my BIL totally dodged a bullet on that one. Sometimes I'll just read about her horrible life choices and completely ridiculous religious & political rants and thank God I don't have to spend another family gathering trying to make polite conversation with that hose beast.

amyc216

rubysue267:

I am sort of terrified to FB stalk anyone from my ~past~. I'm super paranoid and afraid that I'll accidentally click something on their profile or that they'll somehow know that I've been looking at their page. I just don't trust that any of that is fully anonymous.

I have this fear too.  Sometimes I wonder- can they tell how often I look at their page, but I don't know who looks at my page so I assume they don't know either.  ? 

rubysue267

AA0417:

amyc216:

rubysue267:

I am sort of terrified to FB stalk anyone from my ~past~. I'm super paranoid and afraid that I'll accidentally click something on their profile or that they'll somehow know that I've been looking at their page. I just don't trust that any of that is fully anonymous.

I have this fear too.  Sometimes I wonder- can they tell how often I look at their page, but I don't know who looks at my page so I assume they don't know either.  ? 

I don't know how accurate this information is, but it does make sense: I have heard that if you look at someone's page, it will suggest you as a friend to them where it shows a couple of "people you may know". Usually those suggested friends have common friends, but sometimes they don't. My former aunt was in my list of suggested friends, but under her name it showed zero friends in common. That is why it makes sense to me that she was in my list because she tried to view my page; how else would FB make the connection between us?

Yeah that's what I always see, too. And again, totally paranoid, but even though I know you can't see who looks at your page now (and vice versa) FB collects SO MUCH DATA on their users and I'm just waiting for the day they open up the flood gates and bam. I mean part of me wonders what old friends and ex's are up to in a "have a nice life" kind of way, but in the grand scheme of things, I'm uncomfortable with the idea of any of them seeing the bird's eye view of my life and making assumptions about how I turned out, so I try to give them the same benefit of the doubt. I don't mean that in a high-horse / l'm too good to FB stalk kind of way. I'm mostly just a wuss and want some of those broken ties to remain broken KWIM?

Elsa1984

I have FB stalked SO's ex. They were together 7 years. I have found that she had a son with a child molester. Then she married a man and got pregnant, only for the man's ex to show up on their doorstep.....just as far along as she was. They had their son, and got full custody of his and his ex's daughter. Now three kids, and a car owner....she wanted an SUV. So she "accidentally" got pregnant with kid number four. Oh man, now she needs a SUV for all of those kids! Nope, husband shows up with a mini van. In the pictures you can tell the house is trashed...food on the walls, dirty kids, etc. And even though her and her husband have full custody of the little girl, she refers to her as "his daughter". I feel so bad for that little girl!

mrsgabus

I rarely stalk however when I do. I check up on my first and only guy friend. He and I stopped talking years ago as our life's took different turns but I still like to see if he is doing well.

I use to stalk my addict ex but hadn't for years. Since I'm currently trying to get his address for court . I stalk him rather often and absolutely love laughing at him.

jwls84

rubysue267:

AA0417:

amyc216:

rubysue267:

I am sort of terrified to FB stalk anyone from my ~past~. I'm super paranoid and afraid that I'll accidentally click something on their profile or that they'll somehow know that I've been looking at their page. I just don't trust that any of that is fully anonymous.

I have this fear too.  Sometimes I wonder- can they tell how often I look at their page, but I don't know who looks at my page so I assume they don't know either.  ? 

I don't know how accurate this information is, but it does make sense: I have heard that if you look at someone's page, it will suggest you as a friend to them where it shows a couple of "people you may know". Usually those suggested friends have common friends, but sometimes they don't. My former aunt was in my list of suggested friends, but under her name it showed zero friends in common. That is why it makes sense to me that she was in my list because she tried to view my page; how else would FB make the connection between us?

Yeah that's what I always see, too. And again, totally paranoid, but even though I know you can't see who looks at your page now (and vice versa) FB collects SO MUCH DATA on their users and I'm just waiting for the day they open up the flood gates and bam. I mean part of me wonders what old friends and ex's are up to in a "have a nice life" kind of way, but in the grand scheme of things, I'm uncomfortable with the idea of any of them seeing the bird's eye view of my life and making assumptions about how I turned out, so I try to give them the same benefit of the doubt. I don't mean that in a high-horse / l'm too good to FB stalk kind of way. I'm mostly just a wuss and want some of those broken ties to remain broken KWIM?

There was a Facebook app a few years ago that would show you which people looked at you page the most, it showed the top 20 I think and then tagged all those people, pretty much sending them a notification saying busted! I don't know if it is still around or not, but they can definitely track it if they wanted to.

DoctorWorm222

I don't know if I'd call it stalking, but I've looked up a few guys that I had crushes on in high school. I was in a LTR from 16 or 17 to 22 (with a douche -- discussed below), so I didn't have a chance to pursue any of those crushes. It was sort of a nostalgic "what might it have been like to date X instead of Y?" sort of deal. Seems like two of the guys I was crushing on would have been a much better choice -- the first seems happy and successful (lots of vacation pics, etc) and the other just finished an MD/PhD from a great university.

My ex isn't really worth looking at except for one juicy tidbit -- and this may make me seem like a total azz. One of the many, MANY reasons I left him was that he had some physically abnormalities that made us wonder if he might be infertile. I wanted him to get a medical exam before we got married (we were engaged at the time), and he totally refused and didn't want to talk about what we might do about having children someday if he were found to be infertile. He's been married for a few years, and I'm getting curious as to why no baby pics have ended up on FB. Could also be because he's a total deadbeat and they can't afford it.

I need not stalk DH's ex given that she's FB friends (and IRL friends, much to my chagrin) with most of his family. I actually blocked her since I didn't want her looking at pictures of E and imagining that my baby is her baby. I'd cut a b!tch over that sh!t. Territorial much?