New job offer - continued

knottied2a666e3e38a2a87

I wrote a post a few days ago asking for opinions about a new job offer I received, and I accepted it today.    So, tomorrow, I need to have the talk with my current boss and give my two weeks notice and hand in a resignation letter and all of that.

The thing is, she's going to be MAD.  The leadership in my office is volatile and this couldn't have come at a worse time for them.  Over the last month or so, they have become very shorthanded.  Also, about three weeks ago, I applied for a staff position at a neighboring agency. My boss found out about it and confronted me in her office, warning me not to apply for any more positions unless I put her on some kind of alert.  I withdrew my application for that particular job and told her I was only looking because my current position does not offer insurance, and my family really needs it. I didn't solicit my new opportunity that I just accepted -- it was a former employer coming to me. So it looks like I lied.

Is there any way to make this go at all well tomorrow?  I have done a fine job and haven't had any performance issues, so is there anything I can do to keep her from giving me a poor reference in the future, just out of spite for me leaving at an inopportune time?  I'm not good at quitting even in the best of circumstances.

Thanks!

CurlieWhirlie

Congratulations on the new job! Honestly, if your boss can't understand that you need to do what's best for yourself and your family (I mean, *insurance*, for criminy's sake) then she's a horrible person. And selfish! Anyone in the business world should know that it's not personal, it's business. So try to remind yourself that when you are talking to her tomorrow, and let her reaction just wash right over you. Hopefully you don't need a good reference from her in the future. Good luck!

laurakaz13

CurlieWhirlie:

Congratulations on the new job! Honestly, if your boss can't understand that you need to do what's best for yourself and your family (I mean, *insurance*, for criminy's sake) then she's a horrible person. And selfish! Anyone in the business world should know that it's not personal, it's business. So try to remind yourself that when you are talking to her tomorrow, and let her reaction just wash right over you. Hopefully you don't need a good reference from her in the future. Good luck!

All of this. My jaw dropped when I read that she "warned you" not to apply for another job. 

Iblamethebeer

laurakaz13:

CurlieWhirlie:

Congratulations on the new job! Honestly, if your boss can't understand that you need to do what's best for yourself and your family (I mean, *insurance*, for criminy's sake) then she's a horrible person. And selfish! Anyone in the business world should know that it's not personal, it's business. So try to remind yourself that when you are talking to her tomorrow, and let her reaction just wash right over you. Hopefully you don't need a good reference from her in the future. Good luck!

All of this. My jaw dropped when I read that she "warned you" not to apply for another job. 

Agreed!!  Don't let her manipulate or bully you when you tell her -- this is the best decision for your family and you need to move forward. 

nosoup4u

Tell her at the very end of the day? Can she fire you on the spot? If you have other people you work with who could give you a reference in the future, I would look to them, not her. She sounds awful! Congrats on the job (and yay for insurance)!

litzo27

Congrats! I would be very to the point - neither apologetic nor confrontational (just in case she is not as crazy as she seems don't burn the bridges).

Personally, I would say "I was approached last week about an opportunity. I interviewed and was offered a spot. So I'm giving my two weeks notice. I will do my best to help to locate/train my replacement during the time I have left."

 If she goes BSC on you just retain your cool and reiterate that you will be happy to work as much as needed in the two weeks left to assist with the transition. Again - neither apologetic nor defensive. 

knottied2a666e3e38a2a87

Thank you everyone!  It went well -- she congratulated me and that was that.  She did ask if I could stay for 3 weeks instead of 2, which I thought she might do because of scheduling.  I told her I'd check with my new employer and let her know.  I know I shouldn't have relented on it and stuck to the two weeks but I was so happy for it to be over!