IL issue - Come On In!

Mar5195

So my ILS, I love them.  They do so much for us.

BUT when they come to see my son they don't put him down, they constantly hold him.  They see him every two weeks for the day.  I know it's not alot but they don't live super close.  Ocassionally we will see them on Saturday and I'll have them take him home for an overnighter. 

I should say that my MIL could easily drive 45 minutes to come and see my son during the day.  She could spend all day with him but she doesn't make the effort.  She has anxiety issues with traffic and driving.  We live in LA.

So because they hold him 24/7 he's use to it.  And expects it.  If he tells them to take him some place (like to look at a fan) they'll do it.  And they will stand there for a bloody hour showing him the fan.  And when he loses it and starts crying when they walk away from said fan, they take him right back to the fan.  It's insane. 

Anyway they came to my parents for Easter.  And held him the WHOLE time.  When it came time to do the Easter egg hunt I went and took him.  And he lost his mind.  Of course my FIL loves when my kid has a tantrum.  We couldn't get a family picture because my FIL had to hand him over to us. 

I am very happy my son loves his Grandparents.  It's really nice to take a backseat while they care for him.  But if I need to take him I don't want to deal with meltdowns.  Is this just a phase or is this something we need to address?

I don't want to lay the smackdown if this is just a phase.  But I have a feeling this isn't going to end anytime soon.  I'll be honest his behavior is so bad that I want to see them less. 

2chatter

IME what happens next is .... they never set limits, as he gets bigger, they will continue to not set limits.  Then, because he is bigger and more complicated, they will WANT limits but not set them.  So they will be frustrated, but cont

Mommy2my1st

I guess we're pretty lucky(?), we don't see my husband's parents.  His mom and dad were divorced when he was just 6 and his dad moved to the east coast.  His mom bounced around from house to house (and man to man) for years.  It would be ni