Sister-in-law won't let anyone hold the baby...

unsupported

My sister-in-law (married to my brother-in-law) wouldn't let anyone hold the baby at the hostpital, no one just her and the father. This really hurt my wife and her mother, especially since her mother doesn't have a car and we had to drive her to/from the hospital/home, which was like a 2 hour roundtrip. 

 

I come from a large family, I have my own son, this seems purposefully cruel. Am I wrong? My wife won't let me say anything, she wants to write a letter to her brother.  But I just want some feedback from some new moms...  

Sorry, I registered just so I could ask this question and get feedback. Please be kind.

 

thanks

jahjbmr

Did she say why? Like she was afraid of all the Germs or something,

unsupported

No, my brother in law did most of the talking. We were only there for 15 minutes, they made us and the his dad and his wife uncomfortable too. When we asked to hold him (baby) they just said no.

unsupported

They aren't smokers.

 Thanks for the response.

Kyleedawn08

i wouldn't take it personally. it is flu season & such little babies have to be hospitalized for a fever. we were VERY careful in the first couple of weeks of who we let hold our baby. 

unsupported

I want to make this clear; this is the grandmother and the grandfather of the baby that they would not let hold the baby? Forget uncle/aunt stuff....we are talking grandparents. But just on the father/husband side, the mothers parents arrive today.

unsupported

They knew we were coming, we were watching their house/pets for them.

pitterpatter129

The baby isn't a toy.  It's not your baby.  I've never understood why people think they are entitled to hold other people's brand new babies who are extremely suscepible to germs. We just said no visitors at all this time since everyone

VPGIRL06

im not going to lie, I wish i could stop everyone from holding my baby.  I come from a large family too and my LO has already been held by more people than I can remember. I'm really really starting to get irked by it, and I wish I had put my foot

horsevaulter

pitterpatter129:

The baby isn't a toy.  It's not your baby.  I've never understood why people think they are entitle

ArmyWife114

horsevaulter:

pitterpa

ta78

I think new moms are overly paranoid. I think it's stupid to not let your parents hold your baby. A newborns immune system is its strongest in that first week. Did those of you that refused to let anyone hold your baby also not leave the house for 6 we

markhamgurl

pitterpatter129:

The baby isn't a toy.  It's not your baby.  I've never understood why people think they are entitle

Kingston54

My personal opinion is that it is ridiculous to not let healthy family members hold a new baby. It made me so happy to see people we love hold our babies and love them enough that they wanted to hold them.

sararn2004

Teacher Clark:

Their baby their rules. I personally think you are overreacting. Newborns that get sick are most often hospitalize

watermellens

Kingston54:

My personal opinion is that it is ridiculous to not let healthy family members hold a new baby. It made me so happ

markhamgurl

I should add that we DID let family hold our LO in the hospital (after much hand washing!), although I still understand how a new mom might not be ok with doing that.

My beef comes from family (um, DH's parents, for example) who expect to ho

MelTwe

I don't see the big deal.  It's a brand new baby and they're still in the hospital.  I would not be offended.  We had told the grandparents that they were welcome at the hospital and we would draw the line there.  Aunts and uncles w

penguingrrl

If any of my kids treated me like that I would be devastated. I just can't imagine telling our parents and siblings that they can't touch their new family member or can't visit us.

And really, if you're so paranoid that visitors might bring germs

MissNikki007

Kingston54:

My personal opinion is that it is ridiculous to not let healthy family members hold a new baby. It made me so happy t

IncogNeato

BrassyClarinet:

Wow, lots of opinions on this one.

I had a SIL like that about her newborn son, though understandably t

IncogNeato

Original poster- I would have been very sad, too, but tried to understand it. Come over to the Jan/Feb boards and you can see numerous parents of babies who were taken to the ER and admitted to the NICU because they got RSV in their first two months. In a

bennikki

I think it's a little weird that you asked to hold it. Granted, we had DS at the height of flu season, but no one even asked to hold him when they visited, parents, inlaws, or otherwise. I offered to let my mom and mil hold him, but I also knew they were

unsupported

Update:

First all thanks for all of the responses. I in fact never asked to hold him, only GM and GF did. They were both told no for no reason. They never mentioned the FLU/sickness etc..

Second to the "toy" folks, please read pos

BrilliantBrunetteJenny

pitterpatter129:

The baby isn't a toy.  It's not your baby.  I've never understood why people think they are entitle