Philosophical Tuesday Question! Everyone can play. — The Bump
Infertility Veterans

Philosophical Tuesday Question! Everyone can play.

Was listening to a podcast this morning on a totally unrelated topic and a question kind of like this was posed:

If you could go back in time and tell the you (of when you started TTC) how your journey would go up to this point...

Would the you of then want to know?

What would the you of then think of your journey?

Would the you of then have started to TTC?


 

BzeetyD = 38, Mr. BzeetyD = 44 together 12/02 married 9/08
TTC #1 since 1/10
DX: Unexplained/??? MFI issues

Our lil' lost sparks:
5w3d loss 7/30/10 - EDD March 2011
8w loss 4/15/11 - EDD November 2011
8w3d loss 8/2/12 - EDD March 2013
4w c/p loss 10/29/12 - EDD July 2013

Long story: trying on our own + testing testing testing with 6 rounds of Clomid, more testing, injectables + TI, laparoscopy - one tube blocked, 2 IUIs with Follistim...BFNs.
RPL testing all normal, Karyotyping normal

Moving on to IVF.

IVF #1 April 2012 = BFN, IVF #2 June 2012 = BFP. U/S 7/23 = saw heartbeat but measuring behind. Follow up U/S on 7/30 - no heartbeat. D&C 8/2. Trisomy 12. IVF #3 Oct 2012 = Chemical Pregnancy

Phone consult with CCRM on 12/12/12 - ODWU 1/4/13 - both tubes clear(!) - AFC 24, AMH 3.2, FSH 9.6, LH 5.4, E2 25. DH has high frag rate but improved!
IVF #4 March 2013 CCRM. EP protocol w/ Menopur, Gonal-F & Dexamethasone. ER 3/29 & IMSI, PICSI. 43R 13M 10F 6blasts bio'd. CCS testing reveals 3 normals!!!
FET 5/31/13 of 1 4AA blast - thawed and expanded. 4dp5dt BFP.
Beta 9dp5dt = 181, 11dp5dt = 427. 1st u/s showed a healthy heartbeat! EDD 2/16/14

After 4 years of hoping and heartbreak, our sweet little bean was born on 2/19/14
We are so in love with her.

"I'm not telling you it's going to be easy, I'm telling you it's going to be worth it."

Everybody is welcome!!!

Re: Philosophical Tuesday Question! Everyone can play.

  • I was just talking about this the other day with DH!  

    If the "then me" knew what we would endure, she would have been institutionalized!! There is no way I would want her to know as it would have been way too overbearing. You'd be amazed at what you can get through when it is in stages but it would have been too overwhelming/ depressing all at once. I don't think I would have continued had I known. 

    TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
    DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
    5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
    OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
    DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
    DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
    CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
    DE IVF #3 1/14  ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d

    DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
    First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!

    K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days

    imageimage

    SAIF/PAIF Welcome


    http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com

  • image Mrs.McIrish:

    I was just talking about this the other day with DH!  

    If the "then me" knew what we would endure, she would have been institutionalized!! There is no way I would want her to know as it would have been way too overbearing. You'd be amazed at what you can get through when it is in stages but it would have been too overwhelming/ depressing all at once. I don't think I would have continued had I known. 

    I agree. BUT... but... for me, if this journey ends with a child, then I think the naive me would have endured it, and even more, to get there.

    I think, to some degree, it would have helped for me to know that this process would take a long time. It would have helped me to feel more relaxed and more patient.

    But I don't know if I would have thought I could handle it. I've gotten so much stronger mentally, physically and emotionally in the process. And my life, up until then, was not exactly a bed of roses, per se. 

    BzeetyD = 38, Mr. BzeetyD = 44 together 12/02 married 9/08
    TTC #1 since 1/10
    DX: Unexplained/??? MFI issues

    Our lil' lost sparks:
    5w3d loss 7/30/10 - EDD March 2011
    8w loss 4/15/11 - EDD November 2011
    8w3d loss 8/2/12 - EDD March 2013
    4w c/p loss 10/29/12 - EDD July 2013

    Long story: trying on our own + testing testing testing with 6 rounds of Clomid, more testing, injectables + TI, laparoscopy - one tube blocked, 2 IUIs with Follistim...BFNs.
    RPL testing all normal, Karyotyping normal

    Moving on to IVF.

    IVF #1 April 2012 = BFN, IVF #2 June 2012 = BFP. U/S 7/23 = saw heartbeat but measuring behind. Follow up U/S on 7/30 - no heartbeat. D&C 8/2. Trisomy 12. IVF #3 Oct 2012 = Chemical Pregnancy

    Phone consult with CCRM on 12/12/12 - ODWU 1/4/13 - both tubes clear(!) - AFC 24, AMH 3.2, FSH 9.6, LH 5.4, E2 25. DH has high frag rate but improved!
    IVF #4 March 2013 CCRM. EP protocol w/ Menopur, Gonal-F & Dexamethasone. ER 3/29 & IMSI, PICSI. 43R 13M 10F 6blasts bio'd. CCS testing reveals 3 normals!!!
    FET 5/31/13 of 1 4AA blast - thawed and expanded. 4dp5dt BFP.
    Beta 9dp5dt = 181, 11dp5dt = 427. 1st u/s showed a healthy heartbeat! EDD 2/16/14

    After 4 years of hoping and heartbreak, our sweet little bean was born on 2/19/14
    We are so in love with her.

    "I'm not telling you it's going to be easy, I'm telling you it's going to be worth it."

    Everybody is welcome!!!
  • I agree with you if the story ends with a baby. But the "now me" knows that not everyone gets a happy ending. 

    I do wish the "then me" had not eaten as much to get through this:-) 

    TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
    DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
    5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
    OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
    DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
    DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
    CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
    DE IVF #3 1/14  ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d

    DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
    First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!

    K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days

    imageimage

    SAIF/PAIF Welcome


    http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com

  • I probably would not have wanted to know. Part of my keeping going was the naive belief that this was going to happen and not be as hard as it has been.
    Although I have to agree with MrsMcirish on telling myself to put down the darn fork... Lol
    TTC 1/2010 DH Dx - Azoospermia 2/2011
    Hysteroscopy 3/2011 2 Polyps removed 4/2011
    DH on Clomid / Arimidex to address hormonal issues - Sperm found July 2011!
    IVF #1 September 2011 - ER 9/8/2011- 8R, 5M - icsi - 1 made it to transfer - BFFN :-(
    IVF #2 Lucky November 2011 - ER 11/25/2011 - 15 eggs!, 13 mature, 10 fertilized with isci - 7 made it to transfer! Transferred 1 - 8 cell and 2 - 7 cell. BFP!!!!
    1st U/S - Twins! 2nd U/S - 3 heartbeats!!! - HOLY COW!!!
    Prayers for our take home babies!
    2 babies born on 3/27/12 and lost. Last baby born on 3/29/12 and lost at 20 weeks.
    My angels grew wings shortly after birth.
    Ahava Raisel, Matisyahu Nissim & Zev Chaim - Mommy and Daddy will always love you.
    IVF #3 July 2012 - ER 7/17/2012 - 10 R. 5 F. 4 made it to ET
    Transferred 2 on 7/20/2012 no snow babies :-(
    Beta on 7/31/2012 = BFMFN
    A miracle gift expected to come to us through adoption around 9/2012
    Baby girl adopted - Birth Mother changed her mind and took the baby back
    IVF #4 October 2012 - New RE. Doing PGD Testing. 8 R, 7F, 2 made it to 5 day blast for PDG testing. Both Normal (Thank you G-d!!!) 1 boy and 1 girl
    transferred one beautiful 5day blast (girl)
    Please G-d the almighty one - let this be our take home baby!
    Beta #1 158, Beta #2 318, 1 Absolutely magnificent HB at 175! Thank you G-d!!!
    Baby Girl born August 5th. Thank you G-d for our precious miracle.
    AMA. PAIF & SAIF always welcome - I need all the prayers I can get!

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • This is way too deep for a morning question! lol I cannot think of a more intelligent response than just not wanting to know. IF has changed me, hopefully for the better, and if I had known everything from the get go then I probably would have missed out on one of the few (only?) benefits IF offers.

    ***signature & ticker warning***


    Me: 30 ~ Stage IV Endo ~ AMH .38 ~ AFC 8
    AMH .97 as of 4/2012! ~ AMH 1.63 as of 4/2013!?!
    Him: 29 ~ perfect swimmers

    Laparotomy w/partial oophorectomy 8/2009 to remove cysts/endo.
    Stopped BCP 4/2010.
    Multiple clomid rounds from 11/2010 to 6/2011. ~ All BFN
    IUI w/clomid 7/2011. IUI w/clomid & injectables 11/2011 & 1/2012. ~ All BFN
    IVF:EPP 5/2012 ~ (4R, 3M, 2F w/ICSI). Both embryos txfrd. ~ BFN
    BCP to manage endo from 10/2012 to 12/2012.
    FET w/donor embryos #1: 10/2013 Cancelled
    FET w/donor embryos #1.2: 11/2013 ~ ET of 2 beautiful blasts on 11/27.
    Beta 1: 503(12dp5dt) Beta 2: 1035(14dpt) Beta 3: 3001(16dpt) Beta 4: 8503(19dpt)
    Twins with an EDD of 8/15/14! Team Purple
    G&B born 6/30/14 at 33w3d via emergency c/s.

    If you're wondering about my avatar...it's a fried pickle chip shaped like a fetus!

    image

    image
  • Great questions. :) 

    No, I definitely would not want to know. Life was so much more blissful than it is now knowing the reality of things. It surprises me how much my need to have a child dictates my overall happiness or sadness levels but it appears that it really does. 

    If someone would have said to me all in one giant explanation "Hey your ovaries suck, your husband's sperm sucks, and you'll never have children of your own...oh and your mom is going to die amidst it all" I probably would have needed to be institutionalized too, like PP said. Luckily (if that's the right word) it all came in increments which made it easier to get used to piece by piece. I definitely could NOT have handled it all at once.

    DH and I have learned a lot about each other and ourselves in this process and I think there are some definite positives that have come from it. I think I am much more compassionate about everyone else's struggles, whatever they might be. I try hard not to judge because I have no idea what they might be going through just like the majority of people have no idea what we are going through. I have learned I need to just let my husband be angry sometimes instead of trying to smooth it over and say things to make him feel better. I have learned that he is more introspective than I used to give him credit for.

    Yes, I'd still say we would TTC because I want a family (still do, of course) and would do anything to make that happen even if it's not in the method, shape and form I once thought it would come. 

    ************ Signature/Ticker Warning ************
    Me (32) DH (36) - Finding our way to baby #1
    Me: POF/DOR - AMH <0.16, heterozygous c677t MTHFR, insulin resistant and gluten intolerant
    DH: Severe MFI

    12/2/11 - IUI #1- BFN 
    8/1/12 - IVF #1 - Zero response from max stims (600iu intramuscularly)
    My ovaries are just for decoration

    12/6/12 - Adopted five embryos that had been frozen for over ten years!
    2/11/13 - DEmbryo FET #1 Thawed four, sadly two didn't survive. Transferred two beautiful blasts. 
    2/16/13 - First BFP of my life @ 6dp5dt! EDD 10/30/13
    3/27/13 - After beta and u/s hell, no heartbeat ever detected. D&C at 9w1d.

    6/5/13 - Adopted four new embryos that had been frozen for seven years!
     
    9/12/13 - DEmbryo FET #2. Thawed and transferred two beautiful blasts
    9/17/13 - BFP @ 5dp6dt! EDD 05/31/14
    9/29/13 - m/c @ 5w1d. :(

    11/19/13 - DEmbryo FET #3. Thawed and transferred one blast from each batch. Wow!
    11/23/13 - BFP @ 4dp6dt! EDD 8/7/13
    Beta #1 @ 13dp6dt - 522  Beta #2 @ 16dp6dt - 1373 
    6w5d ultrasound showed one perfect baby with a beautiful heartbeat of 134bpm!

    Snowflake baby is a girl! 
    Our beautiful Snowflake girl arrived on July 22, 2014! 
     
     
    My embryo adoption blog: Wishing on a Snowflake
     
        image      image 
  • image BzeetyD:

    Was listening to a podcast this morning on a totally unrelated topic and a question kind of like this was posed:

    If you could go back in time and tell the you (of when you started TTC) how your journey would go up to this point...

    Would the you of then want to know? Yes.  However, I most likely wouldn't have believed it!  I was the first person I knew in my family who has had a difficult time ttc.  It wasn't until my IVF cycles I found out I have one cousin who is struggling.

    What would the you of then think of your journey?  Heartbreaking!  I have always felt sadness for those who were IF!

    Would the you of then have started to TTC?  I would like to think yes.  I'm not sure DH would have gone along with it.  Had I started ttc earlier I would have had a much better chance getting knocked up.  I would have tried to talk DH into it about three years earlier.  I'm not sure if it would've made a difference though!

     

    ::: Married June 2003:::
    TTC #1 since: Aug. 2008
    Me: 34, DOR, MTHFR-A1298C (heterozygous), decreased blood flow to uterus, Mild Endo
    DH: 38, Balanced translocation 5&10, unexplained MFI, normal SA and SCSA
    Tx History: IUI 1&2= BFN
    IVF# 1 W/ICSI= BFN
    IVF# 2: cancelled d/t no response
    IVF# 3= 1 egg retrieved=immature/not viable
    IVF# 4= c/p
    ***CCRM ODWU***
    Found DHs BT and Me-decreased blood flow to uterus
    Recommended DE IVF w/PGD, incorporate electro-acupuncture. Decided to cycle locally
    ***New RE***
    DE IVF# 1(cycle #6) w/pgd, (freeze all): 30R, 23M, 15F, slow/poor embryo development, 4 biopsied, 1 Normal "Norm"; DE IVF w/PGD, incorporate electro-acupuncture. 
    IVF# 6: (OE/DS) cancelled
    IVF# 7: (OE/DS) 1R, 1M, 1F, arrested day 5
    Plan-DE IVF# 2 (cycle #8): DE/DS in May 2015

    http://icanhazbabyz.blogspot.com/
    imageimage image 
  • image BzeetyD:
    image Mrs.McIrish:

    I was just talking about this the other day with DH!  

    If the "then me" knew what we would endure, she would have been institutionalized!! There is no way I would want her to know as it would have been way too overbearing. You'd be amazed at what you can get through when it is in stages but it would have been too overwhelming/ depressing all at once. I don't think I would have continued had I known. 

    I agree. BUT... but... for me, if this journey ends with a child, then I think the naive me would have endured it, and even more, to get there.

    I think, to some degree, it would have helped for me to know that this process would take a long time. It would have helped me to feel more relaxed and more patient.

    But I don't know if I would have thought I could handle it. I've gotten so much stronger mentally, physically and emotionally in the process. And my life, up until then, was not exactly a bed of roses, per se. 

    This!
    ::: Married June 2003:::
    TTC #1 since: Aug. 2008
    Me: 34, DOR, MTHFR-A1298C (heterozygous), decreased blood flow to uterus, Mild Endo
    DH: 38, Balanced translocation 5&10, unexplained MFI, normal SA and SCSA
    Tx History: IUI 1&2= BFN
    IVF# 1 W/ICSI= BFN
    IVF# 2: cancelled d/t no response
    IVF# 3= 1 egg retrieved=immature/not viable
    IVF# 4= c/p
    ***CCRM ODWU***
    Found DHs BT and Me-decreased blood flow to uterus
    Recommended DE IVF w/PGD, incorporate electro-acupuncture. Decided to cycle locally
    ***New RE***
    DE IVF# 1(cycle #6) w/pgd, (freeze all): 30R, 23M, 15F, slow/poor embryo development, 4 biopsied, 1 Normal "Norm"; DE IVF w/PGD, incorporate electro-acupuncture. 
    IVF# 6: (OE/DS) cancelled
    IVF# 7: (OE/DS) 1R, 1M, 1F, arrested day 5
    Plan-DE IVF# 2 (cycle #8): DE/DS in May 2015

    http://icanhazbabyz.blogspot.com/
    imageimage image 

  • Would the you of then want to know?

    yes, definitely.  So many wasted years of being scared to start a family.

    What would the you of then think of your journey?

    I would have never thought in a million years I would get to here, I never would have thought I'd have the guts to go through everything I've been through. 

    Would the you of then have started to TTC?

    Yes. The only thing in my life that I would go back and Re-do would be that I would have married DH sooner and ttc sooner. 


     

    Me: 37, DH: 38: ttc 7 years, dx: unknown
    10/11: after 2 years, saw a RE, FSH 5.4
    11/11: BFP! (surprise after thyroid & normal hsg),
    12/11: missed m/c after 7 week u/s, 1/12: D&C
    6/12 IUI#1-IUI #3: clomid = BFP!, C/P
    IVF #1(10/12) FSH 5.4, AFC: 16 long Lupron, 5R/5M/4F, all 4 made it to 5dt, 1 blast/1-8 cell transferred=BFN
    IVF #2(12/12)AFC 21, MD lupron, 4R/4M/3F, 5dt of 1 blast and 2-8cell. BFN.
    IVF#3(4/13) Natural start antagon protocol, 12R,11F. one PGS normal at day 6 transfer. BFN.
    IVF#4 (11/13) C.CRM (ODW.U normal 8/13 Still no Diagnosis) EPP/antagonist. ER 13R/7M/6F. Only 1 made it to freeze. Abnormal. Looking into options of DE, Fresh vs frozen.
    10/14 new local RE to look into what's next. CD3 FSH 4.7, AMH 0.9. Met with DE agencies and exploring options for feb/march 2015.
    Surprise natural bfp (4 days before donor is signed). Beta #1 at 9dpo: 51.8, 2nd beta: 195 (25 hours doubling) @11dpo. 3rd beta (12/15): 516 (35 hrs doubling) 4th beta(12/17): 895 (58 hours doubling) 5th beta(12/19): 2120. U/S at 5w0d(12/22): one gestational sac with yolk sac. U/S #2 (6w0d)12/29. One little bean measuring 6w0d with HR 124. 3rd u/s(1/4)7w0d: baby measuring 7w2d. HR 134. 3/30: A/S at MFM went great except for low lying placenta. Verifi results are normal! Team Blue! Please send any positive thoughts our way! EDD:8/24/2015
    Baby Will born 8/18. He's perfect.
  • If you could go back in time and tell the you (of when you started TTC) how your journey would go up to this point...

    Would the you of then want to know?  The me of then would need to know that she needed to keep working and not start her own business....now I'm in a position that we haven't got the funds for DE or adoption if we decide to go one of those routes. My bridges are burnt in my previous field so I'm starting all over now...urgh. 

    What would the you of then think of your journey? The me of then would say....WTF, the Clomid didn't work??? Are you sure?!?

    Would the you of then have started to TTC?  Honestly, since I had advance knowledge of my issues, I feel like we started as soon as we could. My first round of IF related tests were 5 months after we were married....my first RE appt. was a year after (the soonest I could get into see her after my HSG and DH's SA were done). I know for sure I would have NEVER been able to convince DH to go to the RE before we were married, LOL. What's funny to me now is that when we first started dating 4 years ago....telling him we didn't need to use protection because I couldn't get pregnant was a selling feature, and now look at us :(


     

    Me: 33, Endocrine issues & FVL       DH: 32, Nothing 
    NTNP 2009-2012         TTC since 2012:
    • Clomid, 2 IUI cycles, and 5 IVF cycles = BFN
    • FET #1   August 2013 = BFP!     EDD 5/11/14
    • Jack dx at 19w1d with Dandy Walker on 12/16/13
    • Severe Pre-e /HELLP set in Jack born sleeping at 20w1d on 12/23/13
    • FET #2 --July 2014  BFP!  ---  EDD  4/5/15

    Jack has handpicked his sibling up there :)

    My blog about IF and loss ... Kate's IF Blog

            Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 

                                                      

                                                                              Lilypie Pregnancy tickers


                  Anniversary





  • Would the you of then want to know?

    No, I wouldn?t want to know because the person I was then would not have had the strength to get to where I am now without naivety.


    What would the you of then think of your journey? 

    I think the me of then would be amazed by what I am capable of.  I think she would be impressed by the strength I have had to push forward and more so, the lengths I would go to for a family. 


    Would the you of then have started to TTC? 

    This is a hard one.  I am not sure the me of then had the strength to embark on this journey knowingly.  Maybe I am under-estimating myself but I think if the picture map of our journey was put in front of me 3 1/2 years ago I might have made other decisions.  I just think that the course we travel in our lives is dictated so much by circumstance and feeling.  If you were unable to experience the emotion of a circumstance you likely would make different choices.  Having said that, at the risk of sounding completely corny; I am thankful for this experience and that I didn?t have the opportunity to opt out of what the future held.



    ***SIGNATURE WARNING***


    TTC #1

    Me 42, DH 47

    Dx = AMA/DOR, MFI

    IVF/ICSI #1 = BFN

    IVF/ICSI #2 = BFP; early loss

    IVF/ICSI #3 (DE) = BFP; early loss

    FET = BFN

    IVF/ICSI #4 (DE w/ CCS) = BFP

    Beta #1 @ 10dp6dt = 265; Beta #2 @ 14dp6dt = 1251. 

    1st U/S @ 6w2d showed one perfect little heartbeat! 

    2nd U/S @ 7w2d. HB 132 & everything measuring on track.

    Our beautiful little girl arrived January 2015!


  • If you could go back in time and tell the you (of when you started TTC) how your journey would go up to this point...

    Would the you of then want to know? I dont think I would want to know that it would all end with empty arms and empty wallets.

    What would the you of then think of your journey? The then me would be amazed that I had the strength to inflict the physical pain and emotional torture time and time again with no outcomes. The then me would for sure understand how badly I want a baby then and now.

    Would the you of then have started to TTC? Of course the then me always wanted a baby....the then me hopefully would have tried a little sooner in life!!!!

    TTC since 2009 very frustrated 42yr and DH 40

    5 cycles of Clomid with satisfactory response=BFN's
    Fibroid removal Nov2010
    IUI Clomid #1 Feb 2011...BFN..damn it!
    IUI Inject's #2 Apr 2011...CANCELLED...low estradiol
    IUI Inject's #3 June 2011...BFN
    IUI Inject's #4 Sept2011...BFFN
    Lap Dec 2011...severe endo..cyst removed..some remains...
    IVF#1 Apr 2012 ....cancelled due to over suppression
    IVF#2 July 2012....6 follies...only 1 retrieved....BFFN
    surgery suggested to move ovary to an better placement but....we moved two time zones away and are financially and emotionally empty

  • If I had known it would be this hard I would have gotten a divorce immed it would have saved me more heartache then I care to mention. My husbands family are a bunch of heinous witches that fly around on broomsticks and they hurt me irreparably over IF. Also my relationship has been damaged permanently over this crap and it would have never happened had we not started the journey. If I had seen how horrible IF was going to be I would have bought a horse so much cheaper and I would have had constant and immed happiness. When I was in my early twenties all I thought I ever wanted was a horse and that would have been enough and I am beg to think I was right.
    6 m/c
    Anovulatory cycles, increased Synthroid Diagnosed Sep 2010
    Natural cycle Dec 2010 BFP M/C 6 1/2 Weeks, D&E Jan 2011
    1 Clomid/Ovidrel BFN May 2011
    Natural cycle Aug 2011 BFP M/C 4 Weeks
    1 IUI Sept 2011 BFP M/c 7 weeks
    Provera Dec 2011 BFP M/C 3 Weeks
    DQ ALPHA HLA MATCH, High NK Cells Diagnosed Dec 2011
    IVF March 2012 BFP m/c 4weeks 5 days (IL, Prednisone)
    IVF#2w/DS July 2012 MEGA FAILURE BFN (IL, Dexamethasone)
    Diagnosed No real HLA Match, DQ Beta Triad, High TNF, Low NK Cells
    Oct 2012 Natural Cycle m/c 4wks (Lovenox, Prednisone) 
    Went to Beer Center- high tnf, low lad, implantation failure
    Nov/Dec 2012 LIT Treatment
    Dec 12 Humira
    Jan 2013 BFP
    Humira,LIT,Prednisone, Lovenox, IVIG, Baby Aspirin
    Miracle Born August 2013 Premature

    Yours doesn't have to be a sad story



    image
    image


    Lilypie - (ugiy)


  • image luvboston:
    If I had known it would be this hard I would have gotten a divorce immed it would have saved me more heartache then I care to mention. My husbands family are a bunch of heinous witches that fly around on broomsticks and they hurt me irreparably over IF. Also my relationship has been damaged permanently over this crap and it would have never happened had we not started the journey. If I had seen how horrible IF was going to be I would have bought a horse so much cheaper and I would have had constant and immed happiness. When I was in my early twenties all I thought I ever wanted was a horse and that would have been enough and I am beg to think I was right.

    HUGE HUGS. 


    ***SIGNATURE WARNING***


    TTC #1

    Me 42, DH 47

    Dx = AMA/DOR, MFI

    IVF/ICSI #1 = BFN

    IVF/ICSI #2 = BFP; early loss

    IVF/ICSI #3 (DE) = BFP; early loss

    FET = BFN

    IVF/ICSI #4 (DE w/ CCS) = BFP

    Beta #1 @ 10dp6dt = 265; Beta #2 @ 14dp6dt = 1251. 

    1st U/S @ 6w2d showed one perfect little heartbeat! 

    2nd U/S @ 7w2d. HB 132 & everything measuring on track.

    Our beautiful little girl arrived January 2015!


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