Could use some reassurance/suggestions (long)

MickeyM04

I'm being a PW these days I guess!

So let me preface by saying DS's 9 month appointment is Monday and I will address all these questions with the ped, but I am just looking for some input from other overprotective paranoid mamas like myself.

DS seems to be developmentally behind.  He rolled over at 4-5 months (both ways), sat up at 7 months, but now is 9 months old and is still not really doing much.  He doesn't really crawl but moreso just drags himself around using his right arm, like how you'd expect someone to drag themselves to safety if someone had just attacked them and broken both their legs.  He does not pull up at all--doesn't even try.  He doesn't go from a sitting position to a tummy position by himself.  He doesn't go from a tummy position to a sitting position.  And when he sits up he's still kind of wobbly.  Like we usually put a pillow behind him or stay close by because he always looks like he's going to topple over.

Some people are telling me he does seem a little bit behind, but that it's nothing to worry about because everyone develops at their own pace, crawling isn't even a milestone, etc.  Other people are telling me he's not behind because they know a child who is a bit older who isn't doing any of those things either.  But everyone I personally know, their kids are doing all these things, and have been for a couple of months.  And I shouldn't compare but how can I not, y'know?

DH thinks that we just don't give him the opportunity to pull up, etc.  Like that there's nothing really in his room that he can pull up on, and that our furniture is positioned in such a way that he can't get at it to pull up (couch very close to coffee table for example so he can't really maneuver between them to pull up onto the couch).  I can see that as a possibility but why doesn't he pull up in his crib then?  Also, what kind of situation could we put him in to encourage him to crawl?  We put his toys far away but he just drags himself over there with his one arm.  Also, I think with him not crawling on his hands and knees, he's not "tall" enough to be able to pull up.  Like imagine trying to pull up on a piece of furniture while laying flat on your stomach.  His arms don't even go high enough to get to the furniture to pull himself up.

I just worry that he has some sort of spinal problem or something because he doesn't seem to be able to support himself great while sitting and he only ever uses his right arm to get anywhere, and never his legs.  What do you all think?  Is there something I can do to encourage him more?  Is this anything to worry about in your mind?

Missa_g

Crawling is not a developmental milestone. He's mobile, which is great! At our 9 month appointment our pedi said she expects babies to be mobile [crawling, cruising, walking...just something] at 12m. To encourage our guys to crawl more we place fun things like our cellphones just out of their reach. We encourage pulling up by helping them stand with support.

My boys were premature so I'm not sure where my pedi differs on expectations for them vs FT 9m. But remember there is a wide range of "normal" for any developmental milestone.

jertie

I totally get the paranoia - Pip seemed behind for a lot of things too - rolling over, crawling..but the doc said don't worry about it.  With her colic, she never had any real tummy time so she never really got a hang of the rolling thing until she got older.  She looked like a high-centered turtle for months - before she finally figured out how to crawl - but once she finally got it (somewhere in her 10th month) she was off and running..  My nephew was just a lump and preferred to lay back and really didn't get moving until you put food in front of him (hmmm...he's still kinda that way .  And Pip had another kid in her day care class that was exactly the same.  Everyone does their own thing in their time - and when they do figure out what to do - there will be no stopping them.  I hope that the ped has good stuff to say!  Until then - ((HUGS)) - I know it's stressful!

Sonadora

B was a wobbly sitter as well. Our pedi told us we could work on it by getting her sitting and then rolling a ball towards her so she would have to lean forward just a bit to get to it to work on core strength and balancing.

It can't hurt to mention your concerns to your pedi, but honestly, at 9 months, none of that seems too out of the ordinary or behind to me.

I feel like once B got started, everything just happened so quickly. Like one day she let go of something she had pulled up on and stood, then the next day I turned my head for half a second and she had gotten from sitting to standing without pulling up on something (there was nothing near her and she was just standing in the middle of the room!), then a couple days later she took her first steps.

MickeyM04

Thanks for all the words of encouragement and comfort.  It's so nice to feel not so alone!  I think another contributing factor is all my friends have early bloomers...one has a son who was walking at 10 months, another has a son who was full out crawling (not army crawling/creeping) at 6 months, and another has a daughter who is 2 months younger than DS who just started crawling last week.  So I have no frame of reference other than these advanced kiddos.

Thank you for the recommendation re: the ball for the core strengthening.  I will definitely have to try that.

Also it is good to know that once it happens it starts happening fast.  I felt like, gee, well when he starts crawling, it will be at least a month for him to master that, then probably another month for him to master pulling up, etc. etc. and then you do the math and he's like not walking until he's 19 months old. 

I feel a little better now, but keep it coming if you got it! 

Junebug060609

Your kid sounds a lot like mine.

D didn't roll regularly until 5m. He sat at 6m, but not well until into his seventh month. He didn't crawl until a week shy of 10m...he preferred rolling to get around up to then. He couldnt get into a sit himself until he was crawling. He started pulling up and cruising soon after crawling, and walked at 12.5m. He's almost 16m and is now running.

Talk to your doctor to ease your mind, but it sounds to me like you've got s normal LO who is strengthening his core army crawling around. He's mobile, which is the key. Our pedi had zero concerns about D not crawling at 9m since he was a rolling machine. Crawling isn't a developmental milestone, some kids skip it altogether...and honestly army crawling IS crawling.

Junebug060609

Wanted to add that I get your concerns. I had them at 9m, too. And also, if they are ready to pull up they'll do it on just about anything.

Sonadora

Junebug060609:

And also, if they are ready to pull up they'll do it on just about anything.

SO TRUE. It made for some almost really awkward moments when she would pull up on my skirts....which would pull down in the process!!

Helenahhandbasket

I could have written this post!  I totally hear you on the comparing your LO to others-- but try not to (easier said than done!)

DD just turned a year and she sounds very much like your LO, development wise.

She couldn't really sit with out wobbling until she was maybe 7-8 months?  She started getting herself into sitting position (from laying down) at 10 months, and she couldn't "properly" crawl until 11 months.  Before that, she either "army crawled" or rolled everywhere.

Now at just over 1, she is pulling herself up (but that is new- maybe she's been doing that for 3 weeks) and is finally "cruising" along the furniture.

You know what?  DD is perfectly happy and healthy.  Some kids just take longer than others to hit the milestones, and as long as your ped isn't concerned, I would say you shouldn't be concerned either.

Good luck!

 

 

authorofdreamz

He is ahead of where DD was at that age. She didn't crawl or move about in any way (wouldn't even roll more than once) until 10m and now at 14m she isn't even close to walking or even standing unassisted. Her pedi has never been worried so I try not too but it is definitely hard, especially when you see a friend's post on fb about their 9m old walking and things like that but in the long run it really wont matter they will all be on the same page eventually.

3sthecharm

My daughter didnt sit up til 7 months, crawl till almost 11 months and walk at 17 months. She is now perfecily healthy at 8years old with an IQ of 147. Definately discucss concerns with a pedi but I wouldnt panic yet.

orangegoggles

PP's gave you great advice/stories. I wanted to add that one of my nieces and one of my nephews did the same "army" type crawl that you are referring to. Neither of them ever did a classic "crawl" but both started walking within 12-13 months. My sisters doc was never concerned and said that some babies don't do the classic crawl.