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February 2012 Moms
MrsLindinger0905
member
FFFC!
MrsLindinger0905
member
5... 4... 3... 2... 1... GO!!
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Re: FFFC!
DS was super cute and playful last night and I spent pretty much the entire time I was with him wishing he would just fall asleep. I was too tired. and I feel horribly guilty about it.
Been there. Some days are just rough. Connor has been staying up past his usual bedtime of 7 ever since we came back from vacation. On Tuesday, he hadn't acted tired at all but I put him in his crib at 8:30 because he should have been tired. My mom gave me a guilt trip because, "you can't just put him to bed because you are tired of him." Ugh, thanks mom.
I always said I was fine with DD going to daycare, that I felt she would benefit socially from going. However, now that the time has come that we are thinking about putting her in daycare two days a week, I am not as happy. I still believe she will benefit from it and it will be good for her. I just don't want to do it. Up until now she has only been watched by MIL, 4 days a week, and my mom, 1 day a week. I am not knocking daycare, I am a product of it and it definitely has benefits that I want for her. And once she starts and adjusts, I will be fine with the decision. I am just really struggling today because all I want to do is SAH with her and its not possible.
You put him in bed because kids do best on routines and schedules and he needed to go to sleep. And I don't know about Connor, but I can put the girls down at 6:30 or 10:30 and they're still up at 6:30am the next morning. So even if they're not acting sleeping we put them down by 7:30-8 at the latest. Don't let her guilt you!
And Happy, I was so stressed and anxious the weeks leading up to them going to daycare. I was so upset, second guessing my decision to move them being taken care of by family full-time and just a mess. It's been the best decision I could have ever made. You guys will be great
Ugh. What a lovely thing for her to say... God. That's exactly how I felt though. What your mother said is what that nagging little voice in my head kept guilting me for. I get up at quarter to 5 in the morning, and get home at 7 pm. when he is up and raring to go at 10:30 still, I honestly just want to cry
Grant is sick now, so I don't regret the quiet time I got before having to deal with him.
thumbs up!! See my FFFC above. I totally think this is great!! Everyone needs a little alone time with their SOs!! And I think it's totally fair to treat yourself to a lunch out every once in a while!
Thanks Jen! I am excited for her to go since it will mean she is around kids her age and I know in the long run it will be really good for her. And I know she will have fun. I'm just mentally having a hard time with it.
Completely normal
You're LO will be spending time with people you don't know well yet versus family, it's scary. For me, the first day was really hard, the next two were not great, but week two was easy. Just beware, for my two they were so unbelievably exhausted after daycare that we had to start putting them to bed earlier. All that playing and fun wears them out!
I'm working from home this morning because we're flying to DC this afternoon, and logistically it doesn't make sense to take DD to daycare, go to work, pick her up, then go to the airport. I knew I couldn't handle her at the office for a full day, so we're home together. So far, I have vacuumed, done laundry, cleaned the kitchen, and packed. I have sent exactly one work-related e-mail.
I wish I had more friends with kiddos! My closest girlfriend with a LO lives in NC and I'm in DE. Her and her H moved back down there about 2 years ago and me and my H miss them terribly. We were the first of our friends to marry and have a baby. My BFF is getting married in July and H and I are both in the wedding but I feel so disconnected from them. Their weekends still consist of crushing a case of miller lite and Jell-O shots. I'm the only bridesmaid with a child and I'm the oldest of the bridesmaids, I am dreading her bachelorette party because it is an entire weekend. I'm not asking for a special pass because I'm the only mom just a little empathy and that's very unlikely. The weekend bachelorette party is going to be hard mostly because the bachelor party is the same weekend which means DS will be with a sitter all weekend and H and I won't even be spending time together. I'm doing my best to suck it up because she really deserves an amazing wedding and all the events included, but its going to be a loooooong summer! I hope she gets KTFU on her honeymoon and we can get back to being on the same page.
Oh, and the same BFF I'm a little annoyed with. She doesn't really seem to show interest in DS which actually surprises me since she works in daycare and we've been friends for so long. I think if roles were reversed I would make more of an effort to be around her with her LO. DS hasn't seen her since Halloween. Again I just feel disconnected
Exactly.
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I think the "I'm off and sent my kid to daycare" confessions are getting old. We all do it, it isn't really a FFFC in my mind, it is typical behavior for most of us.
I do it when I can because I like to keep her on a schedule and running errands with me isn't going to do that.
I buy into replacement level fertility and was allll about it. I have two children, I was done. Then came DH, and he is not close to his kids and they are very much not like DH or I (loooong story) and I feel really, really bad for him.He really, really, really wanted a baby. He wore me down and we had DS.
So I have three bios. And I ethically think I should only have two. Between us we have five. We should only have four. Of the five, two may or may not be productive members of society, even more reason I should have said nope. But I have no regrets, just have to live with being a hypocrite.
My hubs talks in his sleep... a lot. He said something the night before last, and I'm irrationally mad at him about it. Since he knows I'm angry, he's been going above-and-beyond his normal level of sweet and helpful. I plan on milking this as long as possible.
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My dentist and ped both said that this is NBD, and that teeth brushing right now is more for getting baby used to it. It's more of a big deal when they're completely on solids and really having to use their teeth to chew. (right now they still mostly use their tongue to smash the food)
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That sounds amazing! Don't feel guilty! You are giving a very important relationship the time that it deserves! Your kids will benefit from your strong relationship just as much as you will!
BFP 3.8.16 EDD 11.20.16
So, my best friend just found out she is pregnant with twins. She is also engaged and planning a wedding. These are things (minus the twin part) that DH and I have just recently gone through. We were the first in our group of friends to get married, buy a house, have kids and really "settle down" and we kind of got made fun of for it and ended up getting the shaft a lot over the last few years. I was okay with it most of the time, because no, I don't want to go out to the bar when I am pregnant. It is fine if you don't invite me to an event like that. But, other things kind of bothered me. During our engagement and wedding planning, I got so much flack from my friends for not making my wedding more of a party. This friend in particular boycotted our joint Bachelor and Bachelorette party because it was joint. She wanted to take me to a male strip club and go all out or go to Vegas or something ridiculous like that. We were trying to accommodate everyone's budget, so we did not plan a weekend getaway, and DH and I really just wanted a low-key, fun night out with ALL of our friends instead of drunk fests for our bach parties. Seriously, this girl gave me so much trouble for this. And she was in the weddding. When DD1 was born, everyone was excited for us, but none of our friends understood why we didn't want to leave her every weekend and go out.
Anyway, so my best friend was very guilty of all of this. And now that she is in my shoes, I am so looking forward to her views changing. She already said that her and her FI would have a joint bachelor/bachelorette party and said she totally understood why we did it that way. I am excited to get to say "I told you so" about a dozen other things that are about to happen to her
Wheww that was long, sorry! One more though:
My in-laws mentioned they are interested in going in a swing set as a Birthday gift for DD with my family. In theory, this is a great idea. DH LOVES it. The more I think about it, though, the more I'm not sure. I'll be the ones out in the backyard with the girls playing on this thing 95% of the time. We have a large, woodsy backyard. It's very buggy. I am not an outdoor person. I can see a swing set getting infested by spiders and I am not braving that fear of mine so my kid can go down a slide. I'd rather walk them to the park. It's nice to have time away from the house and we have a really nice park nearby. I wish the in-laws would get me the wagon I want for DD :-X (I know, gifts are gifts, you can't be choosey, but in a perfect world - that's what I'd want!)
I have never been called for jury duty, ever. I'm pretty indifferent at this point but now I'm just curious how it works. Why have I never been called and you so many times? Interesting.
I completely agree with this! I hate when people say it is your patriotic duty and you should be honored to serve on a jury. I get it, it's great that we have a system like this, but it doesn't make it any less annoying and inconvenient. And while we live in a nice area, our county as a whole is not that great. We have to go downtown in the City when we serve and it is downright scary. Like yes, I am scared for my life and I am not exaggerating.
Excellent! You've just vindicated my laziness
I've also never been called. I want to go and try it out once, but it sounds like a PITA from what everyone else has said.
When people don't use their turn signals it makes me super irritated. Does this even count as a confession? I don't know, whatever. If you don't use your turn signal, can you explain why you don't?
Silly Nat...it is because they are arrogant, self-absorbed idiots who think the rest of us should just move out of their way. Didn't they cover that in your drivers education course?
Honestly, these people make me stabby. Turn signals are standard on all cars, even the super luxury ones who are usually the morons who don't use them. why is it so flipping hard to use it?!?!?!!?
Clearly I have road rage today! Don't even get me started on the assholes who go on the shoulder to get around you when you are turning...
I was going to post this on my other bmb, but they're not very understanding...and I know y'all are so...
I am petrified about having another baby. A small part of me wishes that I wasn't pregnant. I would never end my pregnancy for any reason, but a part of me wishes that I didn't have those kinds of convictions. We are happy about another baby, but I am nervous as helllll and haven't expressed it to DH. He would be understanding, I think... he just doesn't understand what this means for me. I never got breastfeeding down with DD and ended up pumping for 6 months, I would not be able to pump like that with an 18 month old, and learning to breastfeed is going to be even harder with an active 18 month old. If I am unable to bf the next one, I will have even more regret. There are just so many things that I have to deal with, that dh doesn't. He wants 5 children and originally I did, too...but I am not so sure anymore. ugh...maybe it's just the hormones, but I am going crazy with nervousness.
Its ok to be nervous! Having a baby is a big deal. Talk to your H, maybe he feels the same and you can lean on each other. Don't worry about having 5 kids right now, just focus on the sweet girl you have now and the new baby on the way. whenever something seems like an insurmountable task to me, I break it down to its smallest pieces so I can focus on just getting through the next week, or day, or hour, what ever feels more manageable.
And if you can't BF the new baby, try not to beat yourself up. I know its easier said than done, but you do the best you can and learn to live with the rest. ::creepy internet hugs::
I have another one. My sister is going to baptize my niece. NBD right? Well it bugs the *** out of me because she NEVER goes to church. She doesn't even do the Christmas/Easter thing. The only time she goes is when she is being an AW (like when my parents announced that she was pregnant, she was there that day).
It REALLY bothers me when people who don't attend church (and have no desire/plans to) come in and baptize their baby. I've mentioned this before, but baptisim in my church means the the congegration is promising to help raise the child in the ways of the church, to help him/her grow spiritually. How the f*** can we keep that promise if you don't attend? Also, the parents promise to raise the child in the church. Ummmm....can't do that if you never show up.
I guess my FFFC is that I can't stand when people do things because it is "tradition" or expected and that is the only reason. If you are goin gto baprize your child, do it because you BELIEVE in the scantity of baptism. Not because you want attention.
I just wish I had a little more time to be the Mom I want to be.
My Colton...Growing up so fast!
And Coralee, his baby sister...On the way!
I will say, at least you have guilt over it (not that I want you to feel bad) because you are doing more than some moms and a lot don't give a second thought to it.
I'm in the same boat, I rely on daycare to give her balanced meals and we do the best we can on the weekends.
If organic no salt veggies are bad, I am going to mommy hell.
DO NOT feel bad! I have two older children, and maternity leave was a wake up call. It's NOT that I work, it's that kids are demanding! I cooked the same things on mat leave as I do now. I do need some new go-tos, but I bet you and I throw together similar kinds of things.
DH was off Wed/TR. I let DH sleep in on Wed and when DS got up yesterday, I asked that he take DS downstairs and let me just get another hour or so of sleep. DS hasn't been napping well and waking up at night and I have been sick since New Year's Eve and having trouble sleeping myself. I also never get a break.
The next time I woke-up, I felt like- "hmm.. I feel rested enough to get up now or I could go back to sleep for a little more, lets see what time it is..."- and it was 2pm!
I was going to baptize Grant and I don't believe in it. My hubby's parents and grandparents are very catholic as are mine. They keep bugging me. I would go more in depth but it sucks to type on my phone.
This is one of the stangest FFFC I have ever read. I am so confused. I trying to wrap my brain around everything you wrote. You had your DS as a do-over becuase your DH doesn't feel close to his kids? So does this mean that your DH has no interest in repairing the relationship with his first 2 kids? Why doesn't he feel close to them and doesn't the responsibility lie with him to make it right?
This breaks my heart for your step children and the fact that you feel that 2 of the 5 probably won't be productive members of society. Who's fault is that?
Maybe I am just naive and obviously there is more to the story, but this is one of the harshest things I've seen written on here in a long time.
I still don't have anything planned for LO's birthday.
I just don't know what to do! We could have a small party at the IL's house, but that is two hours from us. We don't know anyone where we live but I am in a mom's group and they do parties. I was thinking about setting one on the calendar for DS, but our house is still a wreck from Christmas + a bunch of hand-me-downs that we have nowhere to store and I've been sick since New Year's Eve, so not much is getting done and I don't know it will be clean/tidy enough for me to feel comfortable having people over in the next two weeks. Or I was also thinking- forget everyone else this year- and just taking DS to the aquarium for his birthday and doing a smash cake with DH & I.
By the time I decide, it will be his birthday already!
I've been called twice in the last couple of years. It is a big PITA and if you are working, you have to miss work and you only get compensated like $3 a day!