While in the hospital with baby # 2 (or 3, 4, 5, ect) Did you/will you?
-Leave written instructions for feeding, bathing, sleeping, ect.
-Have older sibling come visit while you're in the hospital.
- Send DH/SO home if possible. For example, if I deliver at 3pm DH can go home for bedtime and whatnot so DS isn't totally thrown out of his normal routine.
Any other tips? I know I'm more nervous about being away from DS (17 months at the time #2) than he will be.
Re: While in the hospital with #2?
Still PG but expecting to go any day now so these are still somewhat tentative but...
I did type up general info for my parents while they're staying with DD - bedtime routine, where things are (like her clothes and shoes and feeding stuff), instructions for cloth diapers if they want to use them instead of sposies, medicine dosing in case that's needed, info on our cat, that sort of thing.
We're planning to have her visit in the hospital. DH wouldn't have it any other way and I know I'll miss her some too.
We don't live far from the hospital so DH will most likely go home at some point but I've asked that he stay the night with me. It was a huge help last time and it also seemed like great bonding time for him and DD.
The only other "tips" I can think of right now is that I got easy-to-prepare meals for DD so the grandparents have it easier (the Gerber toddler microwave meals) and I specifically set aside the outfit that I want her to wear to the hospital - a special big sister shirt - so it's easy to find.
THAT I didn't think about! Good suggestion!
DS1 met his little brother when we brought him home from the hospital. I did not want him to come to the hospital because i didnt want him to get worked up when he saw me and i couldnt go home with him and he was 16months, he would have been getting in to everything and i didnt need that kind of stress. Im glad we did it that way.
I have control freak tendencies, so I had planned on having VERY detailed instructions to leave with MIL (who watched DS1 while I was in the hospital). I also planned to order a really cute "Big Brother" t-shirt for DS1 to be put in when he came to meet his little brother in the hospital.
All that went to sh!t when my water broke at 38 weeks. So DS1 was left with MIL with no instructions whatsoever. And you know what? Everything was FINE.
My inlaws came over to our house when I went into labor (at midnight). I had made a list of our daughter's schedule and meal ideas. I had one list on the refrigerator and another in a bag filled with snacks, easy meals, diapers and wipes, and a change of clothes. They ended up taking her to their house in the morning, so it was nice for them to have the bag ready to go.
My daughter did come to the hospital but I wish we had a more private first meeting. My inlaws brought her that afternoon and I was very emotional when she didn't want to see me. After her first visit my husband brought her home and stayed with her the rest of my stay in the hospital.
Both sets of our parents are very used to watching DS1 during the day (when I am at work, part time) and have done plenty of overnight visits with him. So they didn't need any instructions.
My in-laws picked up DS1 and our dog and took them to their house right before I left for the hospital (I think it was around 6pm or so). The next day they brought him over to the hospital to see me/dad/baby. DH left with them for a bit to go out to lunch and play for a bit. But DH stayed with me overnight in the hospital the whole 2 nights we were there.
My in-laws brought him back home shortly after we got home from the hospital.
I had a scheduled C with our #2...
DD went to my Mom's house the night before my surgery, they have watched her before so no directions needed and to be honest, I felt like they could keep any schedule they wanted considering they were helping us and DD would probably be a bit upset.
They came to the hospital after I had my surgery, had recovered and was moved into my room. DD met her little brother and visited for an hour or so before heading back to their house. DH stayed with me the entire time, especially having a section, it was nice to have an extra set of hands without having to page and wait for a nurse for everything.
DD stayed at our house and my mom came down to watch her. DH did not go home because we were only at the hospital one night and we both wanted to soak in that newborn "honeymoon" together. We knew that our attention would be majorly divided the moment we stepped foot back in our house, so that time in the hospital was time we devoted totally to DS.
DD did come visit the evening he was born. I wanted that experience and those family pictures. But she stayed about 30 minutes and it was not a big thing.
If possible, we would do it the same way if we have #3. Obviously these things would change if we were in the hospital for more than a day or two or if we didn't have family watching our kids.
Married 6/28/03
Kate ~ 7/3/09 *** Connor ~ 11/11/10
4 miscarriages: 2007, 2009, 2013, 2014
*~*~*~*~*
No more TTC for us. We are done, and at peace, as a family of 4.
"Suffering has been stronger than all other teaching, and has taught me to understand what your heart used to be. I have been bent and broken, but – I hope – into a better shape.” — Charles Dickens
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I did write out DS's normal schedule.
DH stayed with me in the hospital. He only went home to shower.
DS visited us at the hospital where he met his new little sister. We gave him a big brother gift when he came in order to occupy him. He was only 21 months.
Who is your child going to stay with? I think, if it's an option, you have have 1 or 2 overnight stays with that person while all is well, and your son isn't coming home to a whole new scene. You can see how everyone does with it, and it'll ease your mind a bit and give you less to worry about at delivery.
I won't leave written instruction because my son is going with Grandma, and she takes him overnights now, so they know what to do.
I plan on having him come to visit in the hospital.
I don't think DH will go home, my son has had overnight visits with Grandma before and he really enjoys himself, and I'd like to have a night with the 3 of us to bond while he's taken care of.
I typed out his schedule, so that no matter what time I went into labor they can refer to the sheet with times and his routine.
He did come visit, I delivered little brother at 8pm so he didn't come until the next day after his afternoon nap. He would come each day for lunch go home for nap and then come back for dinner. We live 15 minutes from the hospital and I was also there for 4 days.
DH went home everynight to keep that part the same for DS1. I was alone alot at the hospital since DH was taking care of DS, but it was kind of nice having that time with DS2. I look back with fondness on that time, of rest and quiet!
My kids are 18 months apart. We had DD stay at grandparents house while I was in the hospital. She had stayed overnight with them before so I wasn't too worried. If you have not left your DS overnight before, maybe you can do a trial run before you actually have the baby.
Yes I did leave written instructions for feeding and sleeping.
Yes I did have DD come visit at the hospital. She was very excited mainly b/c all her favorite people in the world, parents and grandparents were all there together. She wanted mommys attention and didnt seem too interested in the baby. We kept the visit short and then Daddy walked DD and Granny out to the car. We also timed it after she had nap and snack so she was not cranky. We also gave her presents at the hospital- big sister book and balloon.
DH stayed overnight at the hospital with me both nights, but he did go home to shower and stuff.
Don't worry too much about your older DS, he will be fine without you for a few days, especially if he is being spoiled by his grandparents.
I left "loose" instructions for my mom when taking care of DS... ideas for meals, basic schedule, etc. I didn't mind if she didn't stick to it completely.
DS did come to the hospital, he was the first one that got to meet his new baby brother ( after me and DH ofcourse). DS really had no idea what was going on, but it was good to see him and share a few minutes together as a family of four.
DH stayed at home. He would pick up DS from my moms at night for bed, then drop him back off at my moms in the morning on his way to see me and the LO at the hospital.