Need Advice-I think I'm trapped at my job

BabyCsMomma

I work for a smallish business, less than 100 employees. I've been here nearly 5 years, and have been chosen to attend several trainings, both online and on site, under the guise of becoming a management trainee soon. Well, I've since been passed over twice. The first time was because I got pregnant-of course I can't prove that. This time?  I can't figure out why. My employer is very skiddish, doesn't like conflict, and by going to them and complaining, I will certainly never get into the program. I'm really ready to cut my losses and start looking for a new job at this point...I need help trying to figure out what I should do!

ASmallWonder

Like Hilarity said, you need to have a conversation but not a complaint.  I'd start off with "I realize that every person isn't a fit for every job.  There have been two come up in x amount of time and I'd like to understand what skills you were looking for that I don't currently have so that I can work to be a better fit for positions that may come available."  You may truthfully NOT have been a fit for those positions and there really may be things you can do to improve your chances.  Being groomed for management doesn't mean you definitely have a position waiting for you.  Maybe they just don't feel you're ready but it'll help you to understand that or to solidify your feelings of being screwed.

1026pumpkin

I agree with the PPs.  I would ask for a performance review or opportunity to discuss your career plans, and remind your manager of your career goals, what you've been working on, and ask if there is anything else you can be doing.  After you get some feedback, I think you can mention that you haven't gotten the last 2 promotions that you tried for and were wondering if there was a reason or anything left you still need to work on.

It's possible they have a good reason (maybe other candidates had more experience or seniority).  If they're vague, as PP said, I would see that as writing on the wall and start looking elsewhere if you want to move up. 

BabyCsMomma

Thanks for the input. I agree, I need to be non-whiny and complaining. They do these questionnaires at work all the time, asking us "where we see ourselves in 5 years" and things like that. We are getting our annual evals in the next month or so, so I'm going to wait until then to broach the subject. I just feel like I'm in a holding pattern, but every time I've gone to upper management, they say I'm doing a great job, and am next in line for management training once an opening comes up (it isn't a formal position to apply for). Openings occur once every couple years, so if I'm out this go-round, I don't know what I'm going to do.

vedwards

I don't know that I have any advice but I do know where you're coming from.  Where I work there are maybe 150 people now and in my department there are 6.  About 4.5 years ago when I started I was the second one hired in my department.  A year later a VP was hired and within the last 3 years 3 more people have been hired in my department and given the title "Director."

I consistently have positive reviews and was finally, after being here for almost 3 years, given a more appropriate title (I never did anything "administrative assistant"-ly as my title was when I was hired).  I have asked three times and been denied a raise each time.  "Your work is excellent but it's not in the budget."  "I'd love to give you a raise but you asked too late, the budget is set."  "I took your request to the higher ups and added in one of your bosses (I'm sorry but did that boss have the balls to ask for a raise?  no.) but it's not in the budget to give you a raise."

It's been extremely difficult to be told the work you do is above and beyond and then be denied fair compensation due to "budgets" and then see more people hired in the same department.  Not just hired though, hired above you.

I'm giving it 5 years.  My 2% cost of living increases every year haven't even equaled an extra dollar an hour from the day I started in 2008.  I'm trying to do my best but it's difficult when you feel trapped, as I do too.

Hang in there.  Hopefully you'll get your breakthrough soon!

reb562

I hate to say this, in fear I might get flamed but how is your appearance? and how are you qualified?

When the position that I have now was available, and I was promoted--we had a girl walk out and quit because she felt she deserved the promotion instead of me.

I was more than qualified to receive the promotion.  However, she thought because she has been with the company 12 years she deserved it, but she wasn't polished.  She came to work in flip flops and shorts sometimes...dressed like a slob most times and chewed gum all day long.  I'm not putting her down, but just stating the facts.

She also thought because she was with the company 12 years it was 'her time'. Yet I had the experience when it came to negotiations, supplier/customer contacts, international and domestic field work and more.  While her only experience was customer service.

Try to dress more like your boss if you don't already and check what qualifications that position your eyeing for needs and try to get them...don't expect to be groomed most employers want people who can take the ball and run.