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June 2011 Moms
butterfly62682
member
CP: RF vs FF
butterfly62682
member
We can keep it clean by keeping it anonymous but I really wanted to see how many are still RF vs how many have started FF.
I still won't even think about FF until after two. But I know a few people (IRL) that are already FF under two.
[Poll]
~ Cassie ~
This discussion has been closed.
Re: CP: RF vs FF
Oh, wow! That's crazy. It reminds me of the time I got out at Radio Shack and looked into the car next to me. She also had her infant car seat FF. I wanted to say something but what do you do in that situation. Knock on the window and say, "Hey, not trying to be nosy or a b*tch or anything but did you know...."
My take on parenthood is you should be as well educated in everything about your children, especially their safety. There is a girl on FB that is always taking pictures of her LO in the car seat. The baby is not strapped in right in any of them. It's why I post so often over there on the safety of strapping your children in right. Trying to throw a not so offensive hint out there. If I knew her better I would just confront her on it.
She said she would let the other director know too and one of them just happen to be outside when she was dropping them off or picking them up and ask "wow, why do you have him forward facing already"? She seemed like they would try to mention it to her...so I hope so.
She is from France, so I'm wondering if the laws there are different and she really just doesn't know. I'm hoping that's the case.
Everytime my mil (who sees DS every other week or so) sees LO rf, she asks, "wow he's STILL facing backwards?!". I've told her a gazillion times that we wont be ffing until he's at least two and how it's so much safer. She obviously doesn't listen to a dang word I tell her because she'll be asking again next time. No, MIL, I'm not just being a paranoid FTM, there's a legitimate reason DH and I are making this decision.
My MIL and all my ILs really were like that when DD was one. So annoying. I got so tired of answering the question and listening to her "her poor legs are cramped" crap that I just ignored it.
oh my DD's legs get cramped and she gets upset looking backwards (since she even knows the difference). I figure I'd rather risk a broken neck over some cramped looking legs so she can look comfy.
I kid
Her legs aren't actually cramped at all. Just throwing out all the excuses you hear.
My view on this is clear. We RF! I see so mnay FF so early and I have no idea why. I can see no logical reason.
BLOG
You hate that a mother was FFing her 4 month old and people are judging it as being a bad decision? I'm hoping you're referring to other posts and not that one.
I dont even know why I opened this. Hasn't this been discussed enough?
June Bugs Blog
Evidently there is nothing that can be discussed enough on TB. It's getting old.
To all of the above:
Why hell yes I judge a mother who FF her infant (under a year old). It's illegal, not just STUPID.
Now on to whether or not it's been discussed enough or not...well if that is how you feel then great. Don't open the post that says "CP: RF vs FF". Clearly it is a subject you do not want to talk about. So why even bother???? or post?
But I do believe that this a public forum and I can post about what I choose and others can also respond as they feel. You have this right, too. But I think you are doing just as much judging here as anyone by posting something against what we are talking about.
Why do people even bother anymore (or in the first place) with all these stories of horrible parents doing such horrible things? What's the benefit in that? That's what's getting old.
I judge her.
Butterfly, I pink puffy heart you. I wanted to say this and was super close to saying pretty much the same thing but decided not to.
Has this been discussed multiple times on this very board? Yes. Is that anything new? Hell no. We discussed everything a million times throughout the history of this board. As do pretty much all of them. CD vs Sposies. Are you swollen? Is this labor? Are you dilated? Do you like this name? FF vs BF?
Don't wanna read it? Don't open it. Don't want to be flamed? Only way to avoid that is don't say anything. Don't like judgy-ness? Stop going to online forums.
Discussions about this are good. I can't tell you how many friends I've brought this up with who had absolutely no idea. They know the law is one, so they turned or planned to turn their kids at one. It's not a matter of opinion, it's a matter of fact, about safety.
Heck - the nurse practitioner at my pedis office told me to turn DD at one! There is a lot of misinformation out there. More education about it can never be a bad thing IMO.
My DD's legs are pretty long and she doesn't look too cramped to me. In fact, I'd say she has a lot more time before I'd even consider that being an issue. That excuse is a load of crap, IMO!
Its not the ff/rf car seat discussion so much as the "look how horrible this mom is...Im so much better than her" attitude that comes into a lot of the posts. It's tiring. And you're right I shouldn't have opened this expecting a simple clicky poll. My bad...
June Bugs Blog
I turned my kid around at 2 months, and that's even if I bother to use a car seat, so all you b!tches better not judge me!
My story wasn't about judging the parent...in fact, I didn't really judge them. I assumed she just wasn't aware. I was sincerely concerned.
Update: The director I spoke with yesterday mentioned something in passing to the mother yesterday. Something along the lines of "Another parent noticed that your son was forward facing....". Apparently the boy has some disorder where he doesn't have pectoral muscles or something or other and can't rear face. She basically said that the other parent (me) should mind their own business and was very angry. And that if I wanted to try and get him into his seat rear facing then good luck to me. Oh well...I am kind of upset that she's angry, that was not my intention. I just wanted to make sure she wasn't just unaware of the law, considering she was from another country where maybe the laws are different.
Not to start another debate on here, but I'm just trying to picture what a kid looks like in a car seat RF'ing and FF'ing....and essentially, their bodies are in the same position, right? It's just the carseat that is flipped. and if this baby is only a few months old, then his legs and feet wouldn't be cramped up yet either, or even touching the seat in front of him.
That being said, I wouldn't feel bad about saying something, I think you did the right thing.
Photos from Libby Hilf Photography
Jake - 1.15.08
Liam - 5.17.11
I totally thought that too. When she said "Let her try and put him in there" or something like that...all I thought was, how is it any different than putting him in FFing. But I don't know the extent of the issues and what not...so I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and assume this is physician instructed.
No Jills it's to offer advise and and supports yo!
I commend you for saying something. When it comes to children, not all parents are their advocates. Sometimes strangers NEED to be to keep them safe. I put this right there with calling the cops when you see a child in a car alone. No different in my opinion. Though I know that that is not everyone's opinion and that is ok.
Yep. Around here it is far more common to FF at 1. Honestly, if it weren't for TB, I probably would have done the same thing as that is what everyone I know has done. When I tell them the new early standard is 2, people look at me like I'm crazy.
And @Carla... Did you know that in Texas it is not actually the law to RF to 1? (https://www.txdps.state.tx.us/director_staff/public_information/carseat.htm) The official law is to go by the recommendations of the car seat manufacturer. Technically, the way it's worded sounds great. However, due to the vagueness, there are loop holes that allow someone to get around the law very easily.
I think you did the right thing.
Well. You clearly made a very informed decision. I would never try and tell you otherwise because that would be butting in where I don't belong. Good for you for standing strong!
In all seriousness though. Is butting out always the best policy? We are told that we are horrible judgment b!tches if, God forbid, we ever say anything to another mother about safety stuff. I mean, I know there have been things that other mothers have mentioned to me that I wouldn't have thought of. I am thankful for that advice if it helps me be a better parent. Don't get me wrong. There is plenty of "advice" I choose to ignore. But that's where as a mom, it's my job to take all this information (from others, from research, from here, books, or online) and put it all together to decide what is best for my family.
I don't think always minding our business is best. It's knowing when, how, an to whom to say something that is important.
I agree with the other mother- I think we should all mind our own business.
-and I'd be pissed if I were her too.
I'd be pissed if someone came up to me telling me that my child shouldn't be in a carrier ontop of the grocery cart- My kid. My choices. MYOB. Sorry you don't agree with them.
Big sister meeting little brother for the first time-
<a href="http://s326.photobucket.com/albums/k409/YellowMiles/?action=view
Stop being so judgey about other people's judginess.
And judge.
Great way to put it Kimbo! It's not about putting out there what this horrible mother did it whatever horrible situation. It's about educating. How are you to learn anything if not told, researched, or by seeing in action?
In most of Europe kids get turned FF at or before 1 year. Before a year are the kids that don't like riding in the car. All infants ride RF until I'd say 9 months and then all bets are off!