I love when childless people make holiday calls

Pesky

I have to attend a meeting to babysit.  It occurs with a bunch of folks gathering twice a year.  Normally it occurs at the end of October right before Halloween.  I wasn't worried as this year, Halloween is on a Wednesday so not even a chance of me missing it as I could arrange my flight to be back on time.

EXCEPT this year they have decided to hold it Oct. 31-Nov. 2.  Really?  I pointed out that it was Halloween and I had 2 kids and she said they voted.  Of course they did.  All the people with grown children or who didn't have kids of all.  Sure they voted.  And I checked and there are no flights that would get me there early enough for the start time (I have to be there at the beginning).

Thankfully I have a new direct I just hired so I can make her go in my stead under the guise of "learning experience".   But seriously, kind of rude.  I get it is kind of a commercial holiday but I'm still irritated.  

JWhite1517

Commercial holiday or not, it is important to kids! Happy you will get to be there!

Nechie122

I think you're overreacting. It's not like we're talking about Christmas here. Plus, Halloween is often "celebrated" the weekend before -- there are plenty of Halloween-related events that will be going on on Oct. 27-28.

financialdiva

Nechie122:

I think you're overreacting. It's not like we're talking about Christmas here. Plus, Halloween is often "celebrated" the weekend before -- there are plenty of Halloween-related events that will be going on on Oct. 27-28.

I totally disagree. If she had an infant, then yes, I can see why this wouldn't be a big deal, but both her kids are "older", and I believe one of which is in grade school. They very much know it's halloween. I know I would be bummed this year to miss taking DS around the neighborhood ToTing. And I've never heard of people celebrating the weekend before? Last year, everyone came around ToT ON Halloween, even though it was a Monday. We even ran out of candy! And I'm talking about 6 Sam's club size bags of candy.

Pesky- I'm glad it worked out and you'll be able to send your new hire to the meeting instead.

Nechie122

I just don't see this is a "mom" issue. Her younger coworker probably has an awesome Halloween party she wants to go to with her friends, and now she can't go. As long as OP's DH can take the kids trick or treating, what's the big deal? This is about OP, not her kids. What's next? OP is going to whine and moan because they scheduled meetings during her son's football playoffs or her DD's dance recital?

RoxyLynn

You might have stood a better chance of rescheduling the meeting if there was a professional schedule conflict, and not that you have an event in your personal life.  They already knew it was Halloween when they scheduled the meeting.

daisy662

Maybe it's just me, but I had a tough time even understanding your post... From what I did gather, you have an out of town work event that you don't even have to go to on Halloween and your pissed that it is on Halloween. If you don't have to go - then why do you care?

shannm

Yeah, I just turned down a conference opportunity because it is that weekend. I also thought it was poor planning.

alli2672

That was pretty inconsiderate.   

 

KathrynMD

LOL that this is controversial.

I totally get what you are saying.  I just block those holidays off on my calendar and take them as out of office so there's no issue. 

kmm2150

There is an annual conference I go to frequently that usually falls the last full week in October, but this year is a week later and is those same dates. A huge percentage, from what I observe, of the people who attend the conference are "young family" aged people who I assume have kids at home that are trick-or-treat-aged. I know it's not the same as something like Christmas or Thanksgiving, but I thought it was poor planning on the organization's part to plan it to conflict with a holiday that could definitely be the tipping point in keeping on-the-fence attendees at home.

I don't think moms should get special treatment around halloween, but do think it's poor planning to schedule events that conflict with stuff like this (just like, where I live, you do NOT schedule events the weekends of certain college football games if you want anyone to show up).

alli2672

kmm2150:

I don't think moms should get special treatment around halloween,

I do.  I would give parents of young children special treatment around Halloween and single people with OOT families preference for vacation around Christmas. 

It is ridiculous to pretend that people don't have personal lives. 

 

QueSrah

alli2672:

kmm2150:

I don't think moms should get special treatment around halloween,

I do.  I would give parents of young children special treatment around Halloween and single people with OOT families preference for vacation around Christmas. 

And then all the parents who take off between Christmas and New Years because school is out and there is no other childcare available will be pissed because they have to scramble for childcare so someone with no encumberances can go on vacation?  Giving preferential treatment is just going to piss off someone eventually.

alli2672

QueSrah:

alli2672:

kmm2150:

I don't think moms should get special treatment around halloween,

I do.  I would give parents of young children special treatment around Halloween and single people with OOT families preference for vacation around Christmas. 

And then all the parents who take off between Christmas and New Years because school is out and there is no other childcare available will be pissed because they have to scramble for childcare so someone with no encumberances can go on vacation?  Giving preferential treatment is just going to piss off someone eventually.

lol...I guess that's true   When I was making schedules and giving vacations, I worked in a hospital.  No one expected to be able to take off all of the days between Christmas and New Years.

 

 

 

Fianschneid

Maybe it's because DD is still so young but I don't think I would plan a work event around Halloween, either.

I'm with pps, I probably would have left my kids out of it when talking about the inconvenience of the date. That's your personal life on a 2nd tier holiday, not your company's problem. I realize that sounds insensitive, but that's where your employer is coming from.

Nechie122

I can't quote from my phone, but to respond to why this has become "controversial:" I think the reaction has to do with OP feeling victimized because she's a mom. She's allowed to feel disappointed (or in this case, screw over a subordinate) but to cry "childless people just don't understand!" is so silly. This is business; it has nothing to do with her. I had a coworker at my last job who used to get angry that he had to go to a company retreat each year in Hong Kong that was held the day after the Super Bowl. Discrimination!!! Where does it end?

Pesky

Nechie122:

I can't quote from my phone, but to respond to why this has become "controversial:" I think the reaction has to do with OP feeling victimized because she's a mom. She's allowed to feel disappointed (or in this case, screw over a subordinate) but to cry "childless people just don't understand!" is so silly. This is business; it has nothing to do with her. I had a coworker at my last job who used to get angry that he had to go to a company retreat each year in Hong Kong that was held the day after the Super Bowl. Discrimination!!! Where does it end?

You are correct that I don't feel victimized just annoyed.  And in terms of crying childless folks don't understand, in this case, is pretty true.  Let's face it -- in terms of adults who totally get into Halloween and have parties on the actual day rather than the nearest convient weekend time, it's a small percentage.  As a childless person, I couldn't have cared less about this holiday.  When my kids are out of the Halloween interest phase which will be in a few short years, likely won't care again.  

It's business, which I get and which is why I am not pushing for the date to be changed.  The new direct was going to be attending these meetings anyway and this merely creates additional incentive to hasten that hand-off.  If I were a huge football fan, I might get irritated about Super Bowl as well.  Doesn't mean that if push came to shove I wouldn't go.  My boss (childless, as a side note) also raised eyebrows about the timing and backs me on my decision to send my direct and the handling which includes that depending on attendees I might still be going, just showing up a little late.  The timing is an annoyance, I ranted to the board and dealt with it professionally to everyone's satisfaction and quite frankly, my direct's delight. 

KathrynMD

Pesky:

The timing is an annoyance, I ranted to the board and dealt with it professionally to everyone's satisfaction and quite frankly, my direct's delight. 

commenting on something here, even whining a bit (not that that's what Pesky did) doesn't constitute feeling vicitimized.  Its sharing a common parenting concern issue w/ like minded people who are in similar circumstances. 

shouldbworkin

KathrynMD:

LOL that this is controversial.

I totally get what you are saying.  I just block those holidays off on my calendar and take them as out of office so there's no issue. 

Ditto and ditto!

 I started taking Halloween off of work as PTO.  One year I was the only parent who didn't take it off and I learned quickly that all the moms/dads of TOTing age kids take it off.  Hallmark holiday or not, there are school parties/parades and the neighbors get together.  I'd feel like I was missing a lot if I was OOT for it.  It was even busier when I had kids in 2 different schools.  

Jinsy80

shouldbworkin:

KathrynMD:

LOL that this is controversial.

I totally get what you are saying.  I just block those holidays off on my calendar and take them as out of office so there's no issue. 

Ditto and ditto!

 I started taking Halloween off of work as PTO.  One year I was the only parent who didn't take it off and I learned quickly that all the moms/dads of TOTing age kids take it off.  Hallmark holiday or not, there are school parties/parades and the neighbors get together.  I'd feel like I was missing a lot if I was OOT for it.  It was even busier when I had kids in 2 different schools.  

I'd be annoyed too, but I take Halloween off every year now. We go TOTing on the actual day around here, not the weekend before/after (and I usually work most weekends anyway). I'm not missing out on TOTing with my girls! They're only young once...