WWYD??

WaitingOn3

I have a cousin that is 6 years older than me.  She isn't married and she doesn't have any kids.  We are really close and spend a lot of time together.  She has told me many times that I have the life she thought she would have by now and that it isn't fair.  Ok, I get it, she really, really, wants a baby. 

She used to come  spend time with me and my 2 older daughters all the time, they adore her.  Her attention was always on the girls.

My problem is this, now when she comes over it is all about the baby. At first I thought maybe I was just being silly and it was in my head, so I mentioned it to my husband. She stopped by last night while we were all sitting outside. She came up the stairs to our deck and grabbed the baby from me without even saying hi to the older girls. Then she pretty muched ignored them when they tried to get her to play with them.  She only stayed for about a half hour and when she left she kissed Avery all over her face (which is a vent all on its own) and then left. Without saying anything to our older girls again. 

After she was gone my husband agreed that she is different with them.  I was going to let it go and see how things go but my oldest asked me why she doesn't want to play with her anymore.It broke my heart to see her so sad.

I'm not sure if I should say anything to her or not. Or how to approach it if I do say something. She is really sensitive and she will probably cry and I would rather just not say anything but I feel like I need to because my girls are hurting,  but what if I make it worse? GAH.... I feel so stuck.

jeffsjayme

I'd let it go.  I've been there - I've been that aunt that really wants to be married and really wants to have a baby.  I suspect that as your LO gets older, the attention will be more equal.  You could gently say stuff  like "Oh Suzy - can you come over? The older 2 have been dying to read a book with you." or "Suzy, can you watch the older 2 while I take the baby and run some errands?" or something.  I think there's a more casual way of directing her attention without saying "Suzy, if you're going to be here, you can't spend all your time with the baby."

gisa886

You need to say something. It isn't fair to the other two and if one has already spoken up then it isn't good. Just be as delicate as possible. 

Ximena M

jeffsjayme:

I'd let it go.  I've been there - I've been that aunt that really wants to be married and really wants to have a baby.  I suspect that as your LO gets older, the attention will be more equal.  You could gently say stuff  like "Oh Suzy - can you come over? The older 2 have been dying to read a book with you." or "Suzy, can you watch the older 2 while I take the baby and run some errands?" or something.  I think there's a more casual way of directing her attention without saying "Suzy, if you're going to be here, you can't spend all your time with the baby."

This.  You may considar asking her to call before she comes over and have a special treat ready for your other girls. 

hazysherman11

I would invite her on an outing with you and the older girls and leave the baby with the husband. That way they can get some undivided attention. 

WaitingOn3

Thanks guys.  I'm going to try inviting her out with just me and the older two and see how it goes.  Worse case, I'll have to talk to her.  I hate seeing my girls so upset so it might be the only option.