Getting aggravated re: 1st bday party

JenWhite123

DH's family lives in the same city as us.... All of them, aunts, uncles, parents, etc.

My family lives 4 states away.  We decided to have two 1st bday parties for DD, one in my home state for my family and one here where we live for his fam.  We've already had the one for my family.

DH is not particularly close to any of his fam, parents included.  We go months without seeing anyone from his family.  I've left the guest list up to him.  I'd prefer we only invite his parents & brother's family, but am ok with inviting the extended family....

The problem... DH can't seem to make up his d@mn mind on who to invite!! I explained last night that we need to send invites out soon(her bday is 4 weeks away). I'm getting really sick of asking DH about it..... 

S-Tuna

First, I'm sorry your husband is slacking. I get frustrated with my husband about stuff like this too. 

I would just stop asking him about it. It doesn't sound like you are that interested in throwing this party anyways. Either he will get the invite list to you in time to send them out, or he won't. If not you can tell him that this is why you were asking him about it a month ago.

This sounds pretty black and white, but it's how I would deal with it.

+Jasha+

We had the same issue.  SO doesn't see his side of the family often (we basically don't even see them during holidays anymore).  I finally said "OK I'm mailing out invites tomorrow.  Who is on the list from your side?"  The invites were in the mail the next day :P 

The next problem I ran into was him refusing to call people (on his side) who didn't bother to RSVP.  So I have no clue how many people are coming.  His solution?  Just order food as if they are all coming.....  and then get stuck with food for 8+ people that didn't show?  Um..... NO!  So his next brilliant idea - "well we can just run up and grab more food from the store - it will take 10 minutes MAX".....  And this is why men don't plan parties. 

JenWhite123

+Jasha+:

We had the same issue.  SO doesn't see his side of the family often (we basically don't even see them during holidays anymore).  I finally said "OK I'm mailing out invites tomorrow.  Who is on the list from your side?"  The invites were in the mail the next day :P 

The next problem I ran into was him refusing to call people (on his side) who didn't bother to RSVP.  So I have no clue how many people are coming.  His solution?  Just order food as if they are all coming.....  and then get stuck with food for 8+ people that didn't show?  Um..... NO!  So his next brilliant idea - "well we can just run up and grab more food from the store - it will take 10 minutes MAX".....  And this is why men don't plan parties. 

 

I think I'm going to just drop it.  DD already had one fantastic party, so I don't feel bad if she doesn't have another. 

eesome

Just take charge and invite his entire family. Gather addresses/info from your in-laws and go from there.

I'm sorry you have to deal with all of this...so stressful!

melissa0726

I totally get your frustration!  We are having a small party, and whenever I ask DH about the guest list he starts throwing in random uncles.  And with his side of the family, if you invite one, you need to invite them all. I am just going ahead and sending the invite out myself to the people that I think are appropriate for the party we have discussed, I don't want the guest list spiraling out of control.  If I were you I'd just plan the party yourself, and invite the immediate family that you have in mind.

Duffgurl

eesome:

Just take charge and invite his entire family. Gather addresses/info from your in-laws and go from there.

I'm sorry you have to deal with all of this...so stressful!

kellydw

Yay a 1st Bday party vent post - thank you, glad i am not the only one.

Who knew a first bday party was so involved, I didnt have this much trouble with our wedding guest list.

 I gave a designated number of invites and told him to invite whoever he wanted. He choose to invite from his family only his mom and brother and all of his friends & their families - not close to family at all - I told him that was fine but he had to tell his mom. So of course he never does and we get a "lovely screaming phone call yesterday about it. She took it upon herself to call and find out who was coming for us and found out no one was invited. And somehow this is all my fault bc her perfect son wouldn't do this. Gotta love inlaws!!!