For those with open adoptions...

Julie721

When did you do your first visit after placement, and how did it go? We are doing our first visit with our DS's birth family, and I am really excited, but I also wanted to hear from everyone what it was like for them. Thanks!

kgs0505

Unfortunately, we haven't been able to do any visits yet, as they live on the other side of the country.  I'm hoping to do something next summer when we are travelling east to see my family.

Mostly we text and I send pictures and letters to them every couple/few months.

Good luck and have fun with your visit!

Dr.Loretta

Ours is semi-open, and we do 2 visits a year.

Our first visit was when DD was 3 months old. Our agency has an annual picnic, so we chose that as one of our annual visits. It was kind of a blur--DD hadn't slept well the night before, we were walking zombies, it was hot, we hadn't prepared, etc. But it was still a good visit, LOL. BM and BGM came, we hung out and chatted, and had as good a time as could be expected. It was interesting to watch BM with DD, because she was clearly not comfortable around this squirmy newborn, and wasn't sure what to do with her!

Our second visit was MUCH more mellow!

jennifita2

We have had multiple visits with the BM and BGM. They have went well but I have learned things about myself. The biggest thing was I would wait for her to ask to hold him but she wouldn't ask. She would just come up to me and take him. Psychologically, for me, that was way too much. It was much easier for me to initiate her holding him so I started with subsequent visits to go to her with him and ask her if she wanted to hold him. I definitely feel more in control when I do that. The BM is pretty bold and has four other children and is pregnant again. 

steph196

Our first visit was 3 days after we got home from the hospital! I didn't think DD's BM would be ready that soon, but she called and asked to come see her. It went really well. We have truly become a family, so it wasn't awkward at all. She was a little awkward when holding DD, but the conversation was easy. 

Good luck on your first visit!!!! 

Jermysgirl

We were hoping for July, but it's looking like August.  DS's b-mom usually works on the weekends and she has classes during most of the week, so we've been trying to find a time that works with her schedule.  

With DD, we did her first visit about two weeks after we brought her home.  We hadn't met either b-parent, and her b-dad wanted to meet us. 

Julie721

Thank you for the replies, I am so antsy to do the visit this weekend!