UO Thursday

rrdiva1

AGlaze:

Where to start-

I am guilty of the treating the pets like my kids and calling me and H "Mommy and Daddy"..I don't speak in thrid person though. I also know they are not human children.

I've worked with shelters and rescues who use the strollers for pets that cannot walk or have other physical issues... I think that was the intended use. I think the Paris Hilton's of the world changed that.

To the person who said she doesn't like her H's son, you may need to provide more details to not sound like such a jerk. Not saying you are a jerk but your post came off bad...

I haven't been on in awhile and still don't have an UO to share, just wanted to chime in...

Nice seeing you.

NatalieHolmes

PrimRoseMama I agree with you! My cats are my children, I would never think of getting ride of them, I have had one for 12 years and the other for 9 years. If I were develop allergies I would just have to take meds. I would find away for my kids and cats to like together.

Bink720

TheJerseyCowgirl:

Oh well, I'm still sticking with my UO, but to answer your questions... He was born when my DH was in high school, so I wouldn't even call it wedlock. To me that involves adults. Both parents were kids an she left with the baby, so I don't blame him for not being involved in the kids life. He's trying to do so now, but whatever. And the kid doesn't know he's not wanted. I'm perfectly nice to him, an he enjoys visiting. He is just spoiled and babied by his mother, which has effectively made him completely co-dependent, but with an ego the size of Saturn. I dislike having him around, that's just how it goes. I'm certainly not going to backpedal. It's my UO and I'll stand by it, but don't act like I spit on him as soon as he gets off the plane.

As someone who has step parents I have to say.  If he's not wanted, he knows it.  You are supposed to be the adult. You are in charge of forging a relationship with him.  And your entire attitude about this situation disgusts me. 

rayofsunshine99

slightlyslapdash:

ricecakes1216:

lovelyday39:

ricecakes1216:

I hate when people talk/treat their pets like they're humans.

Just curious, do you have pets?

Yes, I do. I have a dog and love him and he's well taken care of. I'm probably guilt of it to a degree, but I don't refer to myself as mommy it my H as daddy. I should probably clarify what bugs me and it's mostly when people are like "Monny loves you!".  

Playing devil's advocate here, what are you in relation to your pets?  Did you not adopt them?

UO - I don't like when people refer to themselves in the third person.  "Mommy loves you!"   

I don't like it either, but I'm a total hypocrite because I find myself doing it a lot. 

Actually, I think I am more annoyed if people refer to themselves in the third person other than when speaking to their child.  Like "Kari thinks that's lame" or whatever... creepy & weird. 

But when you're talking to your kid a lot of times it's just easier to explain things in third person.  "Mommy really needs you to listen, because if you don't [insert instruction given], you could get hurt".  I dunno, it just comes naturally.  Haha.

SpokenVows

Bink720:

TheJerseyCowgirl:

Oh well, I'm still sticking with my UO, but to answer your questions... He was born when my DH was in high school, so I wouldn't even call it wedlock. To me that involves adults. Both parents were kids an she left with the baby, so I don't blame him for not being involved in the kids life. He's trying to do so now, but whatever. And the kid doesn't know he's not wanted. I'm perfectly nice to him, an he enjoys visiting. He is just spoiled and babied by his mother, which has effectively made him completely co-dependent, but with an ego the size of Saturn. I dislike having him around, that's just how it goes. I'm certainly not going to backpedal. It's my UO and I'll stand by it, but don't act like I spit on him as soon as he gets off the plane.

As someone who has step parents I have to say.  If he's not wanted, he knows it.  You are supposed to be the adult. You are in charge of forging a relationship with him.  And your entire attitude about this situation disgusts me. 

 

Piggybacking off of this, as I also have step-parents. Believe me, he knows he's not wanted. Even if you are nice to him, I can guarantee you there are small things you probably do (body language and tone go a long way) that you don't even realise. But he will pick up on them. I always did with my step-mother.

If you and your DH aren't happy with his behaviour, has your DH sat him down and tried to talk to him about it? For that time he is with your DH, it is up to your DH to be his parent. I know it's a short time, but it's what you've got.

As the step-mother, it is up to you to build a relationship with him. I couldn't stand my step-father at first, but he was very patient with me and did his best to turn it around and build it up. Now, I absolutely adore my step-dad. But as the child, I wasn't going to go out of my way to build a relationship, because I was only a kid and didn't fully understand the importance, much less know how to go about doing it.

Like it or not, he is your DH's son. What does it matter if your DH was in high school when he was born? It doesn't make him any less his son. And unless your DH decides he no longer wants his son to visit, he is going to be a part of your life to a degree. If you want the visits to be less stressful (and maybe even a pleasure!), then it's best to build a positive relationship with him. 

ricecakes1216

rrdiva1:

ricecakes1216:

rrdiva1:

ricecakes1216:

Sorry for the lack of quotes-my phone won't let me quote.

Diva- that picture is adorable. 

JW- I totally agree. When you get a pet you make a commitment to give them quality care. Trust me I've spent a ton on vet bills when a lot of people would have thrown the dog out. I would never dispose of my dog and he gets awesome treatment. He just doesn't sleep in my bed or sit on my furniture and I don't compare him to a baby. I have a friend who compares her digs to children all the time and believes she will be the best parent or offer patenting advice because she has digs.seriously no joke. 

Did you get your package yet, should get it today...total side note

I didn't get a package yet. I got the card and I totally cried! You are so so sweet! Thank so much for it and the gift card! DH will love it when he gets home! 

You have pm.

I don't see one... 

L0vingLife

TheJerseyCowgirl:

My UO... I dont like my DH's son. (I've been told this makes me a terrible person)

Let me explain. He's 15, and DH only starting spending time with him a couple of years ago. This isn't a baby from another marriage or anything. The kid is raised terribly by his mother, which I know isn't his fault, but everything he does annoys me (and DH). His mother just wants her child support and could care less about DH's concerns for how the boy is being raised. Now he's here for his annual week-long visit and it's like having an awkward, helpless stranger in our house. I'm perfectly nice to him, but I neither like nor care about him like he's my family. I've been told that makes me an awful person and that I "shouldn't have kids."

Wow, sorry that turned into a vent. 

 

Wow, you sound like a loving and empathetic person.  If your husband was concerned about how his son was being raised, maybe he should have not waited until the child was 15 before raising those concerns. I bet he can't wait to come to your house for his annual visit.