the hormones and emotions

bnenglish1988

How do you get through all the crazy hormonal sadness and stuff plus the sadness and loneliness of losing not only the father of your child, but your best friend, finance, just basically someone you spent everyday with and thought you knew? I cannot and will not allow my child to be around him because I found out very disgusting things about him. He lied to me (A LOT!) and cheated and abused drugs, ended up in jail...I'm just not willing to allow my son to be around that lifestyle. I hate that I was fooled by him, but I can't help but still feel really sad at times and I constantly have to remind myself what he did because my mind automatically goes to the good memories. Anyone have any tips on how to deal with all this at once?

brokenwings6

Just know you aren't alone. Personally, I just try to take life day by day, and remember just how lucky I am to have a baby that I get to meet in 3 months. I'm never "alone," and I like that. I also just lean on friends and family as much as possible. I still have my moments of unbearable sadness, but I am finding that I can smile more as every day passes. My life isn't the way I wanted or expected it to be, but I can't change it. You just have to grieve the loss of what could have been/what you wanted/your idea of "happily ever after." The feelings are overwhelming, trust me, I know. Just focus on getting through each day. Strength and happiness aren't far behind.

SemperFiPurpleHeart

brokenwings6:

Just know you aren't alone. Personally, I just try to take life day by day, and remember just how lucky I am to have a baby that I get to meet in 3 months. I'm never "alone," and I like that. I also just lean on friends and family as much as possible. I still have my moments of unbearable sadness, but I am finding that I can smile more as every day passes. My life isn't the way I wanted or expected it to be, but I can't change it. You just have to grieve the loss of what could have been/what you wanted/your idea of "happily ever after." The feelings are overwhelming, trust me, I know. Just focus on getting through each day. Strength and happiness aren't far behind.

THIS!

And I found most of my help as far as understanding these feelings from other single mom's. You will mourn your marriage/relationship whether it is now or in the future. But you will. It will take time but take it one day at a time.

SemperFiPurpleHeart

SemperFiPurpleHeart:

brokenwings6:

Just know you aren't alone. Personally, I just try to take life day by day, and remember just how lucky I am to have a baby that I get to meet in 3 months. I'm never "alone," and I like that. I also just lean on friends and family as much as possible. I still have my moments of unbearable sadness, but I am finding that I can smile more as every day passes. My life isn't the way I wanted or expected it to be, but I can't change it. You just have to grieve the loss of what could have been/what you wanted/your idea of "happily ever after." The feelings are overwhelming, trust me, I know. Just focus on getting through each day. Strength and happiness aren't far behind.

THIS!

And I found most of my help as far as understanding these feelings from other single mom's. You will mourn your marriage/relationship whether it is now or in the future. But you will. It will take time but take it one day at a time.

Also if you blog or write a journal to get all these feelings and emotions out, it will help too. I saw a therapist and it helped to talk to someone, but truely it was other single moms that made a world of difference. We are here if you need to chat .

KyleTrigger

I am in a very similar situation as you. My still H has a prescription pill addiction. I knew about it when we got married but he had been clean for several years and was very up front with me and I was accepting of it. I have been around addiction before and I know that addicts are not automatically bad people. The part that I am upset at him about is that he relapsed and hid it from me for a long time.

He comes from a very wealthy family and has a trust fund therefore I had almost no control over limiting his access to money. The ironic part is his family blames ME for "enabling" him and has cut off all access to money. We have 2 children and I was a stay at home mom so now not only am a grieving the loss of MH and our family but now I am dealing with working full time and trying to get my kids in daycare.

I wont lie, I cry myself to sleep every single night. I cant even sleep in our bed because it is so empty without him. I know exactly how you feel. I miss my best friend and like you said, the person you are with every single day. It hasnt gotten any easier for me yet but my mom said it will

It looks like your son isn't born yet? is that right? In some ways it helps having my kids there to distract me but in some ways it is harder because I am constantly reminded of the fact that we are supposed to be doing this together and i am doing it by myself.

Its good you are putting controls in place to keep your kids away from that kind of activity. Hopefully your EX decides to try to get clean and in the future he can be a part of your childs life. I am very angry at my ex but no matter what he is my kids father and I will try as hard as I can to make sure he is part of their life, in a safe manner.