Special Needs
brightyellow2
member
Options
What would you do? Long
brightyellow2
member
DS main issue is at 20mnths still not using words. He may through out a word here or there but its very rare and he only says it a few times and you never hear it again. He makes every sound and rambles all day but no words. Overall he is very well behaved and a happy child. He bangs his head, flaps his arms, walks on his toes, doesn't seem to understand comands, has eatting issues only eats certain things very picky eater but will eat everything that is not food ie soap, plants, sand, basically anything your not supposed to eat. He also loves to be around kids but is weary of adults but is getting better at that. He is "social" looks you in the eye, smiles, laughs ect. So those are a few of his quirks, basically screams autism but he's very friendly. I recently got him in our local early steps program and he receives speech/ot therapy once a week for 60mins. So here comes the question. His first time was last week and they come to our home the therapist walks in and ha a very aggressive personality, not mean just in your face type of person. DS immediately tries to get away from her and the whole time she was there she kept grabbing at him pulling him and tried to make him do things/play he was not intrested in. She didn't ask any specifics about him just basically had her mind made up before she came. One of the first things she said to me was, I mean I'm not gonna tell you you created this problem but I mean you probably did. Ok lady thanks is what I'm thinking. The question is, she asked if next time she comes if she could contain him in a room and not let him roam because he was constantly wanting nothing to do with her because of her aggressive nature he doesn't do well with adults like I said and I'm hoping he doesn't flip out. So would you try to contain him? I'm thinking I can try it and if it doesn't work at least I'm trying. and How many secessions would you go before asking for a new therapist if the child doesn't want to be around the person? And I'll add a third question. Anyone else have a child like this or can possibly know what it is? He was given the first autism screening and he scored just on the radar. They are gonna wait to give him the next screening when hes 2 and has had some therapy.
Warning
No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
This discussion has been closed.
Re: What would you do? Long
She told you "you created this problem"? Am I understanding this correctly? If that is the case, I would call the agency and immediately ask that this woman does not come to my house anymore and I would file a complaint about her. That is simply unacceptable.
Did the person who evaluated him say that his speech was his main issue or is that how you see things? Thats what basically got him in the program and what she said was the main issue. My thing that I would like him to do is understand better, when I tell him things, example if he wants something to drink he'll stand at the fridge and constantly moan and I keep it on his highchair tray which is about 4ft away and I'll tell him its on your tray several times and he doesn't understand till I walk him to it.
How do you define "well behaved" if he's eating random things and doesn't follow simple commands? I don't consider those things not well behaved yes they maybe behavorial issues steming from sensory isssues or what not but I consider him well behaved.
It sounds like he has some repetitive behaviors that are common to autism- the flapping is sometimes referred to as a "stim". Toe walking is often about obtaining a joint compression which is related to sensory processing. Has he gotten a SPD dx? Is there a plan to fade the toe walking which can cause physical changes to the structure of his ligaments and muscles? They did take notice of those things but speech was her main focus when she came.
Has he had a blood test to determine if his eating non-foods is related to vitamin or mineral deficiencies? Other than iron no.
It's great that you've started therapy so early.
Friendly doesn't R/O autism, but it is sort of unusual for a kid on spectrum to be more negaged with kids than adults- it's usually the other way around excepting parents.
"Aggressive"? Or was she more "no nonsense"? It's great when an SLP can engage a child in a more play-like approach, but if your son wasn't cooperating and you weren't wrangling him, what were her options? Would you have allowed him the option of running away from the pediatrician during an appointment? I would say aggressive she was pulling him and even when she went to leave we walked her outside and she told him to go back inside. I told her its ok hes allowed outside. I do understand what where her options but I thought maybe on her first time she would try to see what he responds well to and not be in his face I told her he really responds to praise and she really didn't pay any mind to anything I was trying to tell her.
She would have had the evalution report and notes and was probably given an off the record report on his family ahead of the appointment. I would of thought this also but I was trying to tell her about him her response was "really" and when she noticed he was toe walking she said I am making notes of everything that I'm observing.
Huh? I don't understand. How I felt was that she came in thinking that I "created" these issues by my parenting but when she would tell me to do certain thing and I would tell her what we do she was like wow your doing everything you should and more.
Most kids respond well to the attention of an adult, but some don't. Some kids just don't like doing things that don't interest them or that are difficult for them. This is especially true of kids on spectrum.
What would you have her do differently? Chase him through the house, waste an hour waiting for him to calm down? Right I don't wanna waste her time or ours.
Your options are to give it a few more weeks during which time you help contain him in the area where they're working. Or you ask for someone else. Are you getting OT and SLT from the same individual? You might have to have 2 different people come. She is also helping with eating but I dont feel she is qualified to do so. We may have to get him private therapy also since thats what they're offering us.
Given that the MCHAT is based on parental reporting and is subject to pretty strong bias, it may not be accurate. A second eval closer to 2 1/2 would be a great idea unless he turns around dramatically.
Thanks
Did the person who evaluated him say that his speech was his main issue or is that how you see things? Thats what basically got him in the program and what she said was the main issue. My thing that I would like him to do is understand better, when I tell him things, example if he wants something to drink he'll stand at the fridge and constantly moan and I keep it on his highchair tray which is about 4ft away and I'll tell him its on your tray several times and he doesn't understand till I walk him to it.
How do you define "well behaved" if he's eating random things and doesn't follow simple commands? I don't consider those things not well behaved yes they maybe behavorial issues steming from sensory isssues or what not but I consider him well behaved.
It sounds like he has some repetitive behaviors that are common to autism- the flapping is sometimes referred to as a "stim". Toe walking is often about obtaining a joint compression which is related to sensory processing. Has he gotten a SPD dx? Is there a plan to fade the toe walking which can cause physical changes to the structure of his ligaments and muscles? They did take notice of those things but speech was her main focus when she came.
Has he had a blood test to determine if his eating non-foods is related to vitamin or mineral deficiencies? Other than iron no.
It's great that you've started therapy so early.
Friendly doesn't R/O autism, but it is sort of unusual for a kid on spectrum to be more negaged with kids than adults- it's usually the other way around excepting parents.
"Aggressive"? Or was she more "no nonsense"? It's great when an SLP can engage a child in a more play-like approach, but if your son wasn't cooperating and you weren't wrangling him, what were her options? Would you have allowed him the option of running away from the pediatrician during an appointment? I would say aggressive she was pulling him and even when she went to leave we walked her outside and she told him to go back inside. I told her its ok hes allowed outside. I do understand what where her options but I thought maybe on her first time she would try to see what he responds well to and not be in his face I told her he really responds to praise and she really didn't pay any mind to anything I was trying to tell her.
She would have had the evalution report and notes and was probably given an off the record report on his family ahead of the appointment. I would of thought this also but I was trying to tell her about him her response was "really" and when she noticed he was toe walking she said I am making notes of everything that I'm observing.
Huh? I don't understand. How I felt was that she came in thinking that I "created" these issues by my parenting but when she would tell me to do certain thing and I would tell her what we do she was like wow your doing everything you should and more.
Most kids respond well to the attention of an adult, but some don't. Some kids just don't like doing things that don't interest them or that are difficult for them. This is especially true of kids on spectrum.
What would you have her do differently? Chase him through the house, waste an hour waiting for him to calm down? Right I don't wanna waste her time or ours.
Your options are to give it a few more weeks during which time you help contain him in the area where they're working. Or you ask for someone else. Are you getting OT and SLT from the same individual? You might have to have 2 different people come. She is also helping with eating but I dont feel she is qualified to do so. We may have to get him private therapy also since thats what they're offering us.
Given that the MCHAT is based on parental reporting and is subject to pretty strong bias, it may not be accurate. A second eval closer to 2 1/2 would be a great idea unless he turns around dramatically.
Thanks
I would allow at least 4 sessions before you make any decisions at this point. Starting therapy is a rough ride for many parents and tots. New people, new routines, new expectations....not just for the LO but for the parent as well.
Perhaps she is not a good fit for you and your LO. But don't pull the plug just yet.
As for your question of does anyone have a child like this or can know what it is, I can say that I had 2 boys who were both non-verbal at the age of 20 months. DS1 started speech therapy around that age and 6 months later was more or less caught up. Now, at the age of 5, you would never know he was a late talker.
DS2 started therapy at around 20 months as well. At that time my antenna were up high as he was showing some traits that were making me think ASD: lack of eye contact, propensity to ignore his name, an ability almost a preference to play alone, picky eating. Over the last 2 years most of the traits have reduced or resolved completely. His speech even tests out in a normal range now with acceptable substitutions (such as "w" for "r") based on his age.
My point of telling you this is that your LO will change one way or another as he ages. His quirks may become more evident or less, his speech may improve or not. So, address your areas of concern with appropriate therapy and return to an evaluation at some point in the future.
This is what i'm thinking, regardless of the other stuff, which sometimes we see as HUGE things when entering the realm of therapy but then LOVE that person, IF she said verbally that you were part of the problem, I think that is awful.
We have never switched out therapists, though I knew we had the option and the service coordinator even felt like the OT wasn't a good fit for P, it was just because P needed PT not OT, and the OT tends to just literally sit in the floor and talk to me the whole time (M has this same OT now..lol)
We had a developmental therapist who I initially loved, his son had CP too, but then he was kind of hateful in that he would bring up thats that his son couldn't do that P could and basically say she was undeserving of therapy. But newsflash, how do you think I got her here, with intensive therapy! We ended up moving, but I probably would have just dropped that therapy or switched him out because he truly made me feel uncomfortable.