In a panic

tabbyandaaron

I am totally freaking out, it it my first birth. I had previously thought I would get the drugs and probably have a csection, I am small. 5'2 110lbs. After reading everything and watching the business of being born, I want a water birth and a midwife or at least an obgyn that will birth how I want to. I don't think that the hospitals here offer water births and I also think it is too late to find a midwife or new doctor. I see my obgyn next week. I am concerned she is going to think I am crazy when I say that I am going to stay home in my tub until the very last second I can. I don't want to be confined to my back on a bed, my biggest fear is tearing. I feel that my body will do what it is suppose to, but I have a fear the doctor won't let it. Any words of wisdom?

Vegasbb

I can completely relate to feeling limited on options.

*It is not too late to get a midwife or new doctor. 

*In my town we don't have birthing centers, and midwives only do home births. For various reasons, I would not like a home birth so I'm stuck in a freaking hospital with an OB. Unfortunately hospitals here don't offer water births. 

*I talked to my OB about wanting a natural birth and she advised me to stay home as long as possible when I go into labor to avoid interventions. She was supportive of me laboring while walking around, and not being constantly monitored or hooked up to an IV. 

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It's possible to have a fairly natural experience in a hospital with an OB - this is what I'm really hoping for ! It's an uphill battle, but possible! Good luck to you, I understand what you are going through. It sucks having limited options.. 

brennarobbie

First of all, Congratulations! )

I started my research on all this natural birth business around 14+ weeks, so I remember this feeling...especially after we watched TBOBB. I started researching the crap out of epidurals, pitocin, all of the possible interventions and how bad they can be for mom and baby.

The more I talk with our midwives, the more comfortable I get. I learned that our hospital is VERY natural birth friendly...they just don't get a whole lot of women who choose to do it that way. Every time we go to the office, I feel a whole lot better when my newest questions are asked.

The BOBB movie is AWESOME in getting you the real initial "what you should know" about some of the newest research done, but it really makes hospitals look "bad." It's understandable since they made the movie really to promote home birth (which I totally support, but we've chosen to give birth in the hospital).

As soon as I let my midwives know that I wanted as much as an intervention-free birth as possible, they were completely on board. Go ahead and ask now, and your OB may be able to give you more info about NB classes in your area. S/he may be more supportive than you think.

Good luck, girl! ) 

KatFCo

Even if some hospitals don't offer water birth, they might have laboring tubs. That's what I'll be doing. I have to get out for the actual pushing, but if I want to, I can spend the rest of the time in the tub.

There are a LOT of natural birth options out there. It isn't just a choice between the tub and being confined to a bed. Start researching common techniques and see which one feels right for you. The hospital might even offer classes. I'm doing hypnobabies myself.

Talk to your doctor now about what you're thinking and see if she's receptive to letting you have some control over the birth. She may even be able to suggest some resources for you. You're early enough that if she isn't receptive at all, you can still find one who is.

CurbsideProphet

It is not too late to switch providers. I would talk to your OB first though, not all OBs have the same philosophy and some are more "natural birth" friendly than others.

 

ShanaRoxy

I dont think its toolate to switch doctors or start woring with a widwife. I would definitly continue doing research as far as your insurance and if they pay for home births. Additionally, there are a lot of practices whwre both OB's and Midwifes can work together. You basically work withthe midwife and the OB is on standby in case serious medical intervention is needed- this is what I am doing, I have a midwife and and OB that work together essentially. I plan on laboring as much as I can at home and then get to the hospital for an unmedicated delivery along the side of my midwife. Unfortunatley, my insurance does not cover for home births or birthing centers so obviosuly that was out of the question for us. I am a FTM too and a shorty too 5'1''! Good luck!

tabbyandaaron

Thank you everyone, I feel better. I watched the bobb and that's when all the anxiety started. My husband agrees we should try and stay home as long as possible so we have more control and less intervention. I am going to talk to my Ob doc next week. If she does not  seem receptive we will look into a new doctor. I may get lucky and the hospital will have a labor bath and my doc will be open to the idea, that would make me feel more comfortable! Thanks again everyone! 

cattynine

KatFCo:

Even if some hospitals don't offer water birth, they might have laboring tubs. That's what I'll be doing. I have to get out for the actual pushing, but if I want to, I can spend the rest of the time in the tub.

This! My hospital had 1 room with a tub and I was allowed to labor in it, just not deliver there. Ask your doctor about the options.

Also, I just had a med-free birth on Wednesday (going to post my story sometime soon hopefully) at a hospital. It is possible! Don't panic. You still have plenty of time to prepare.

doggie mama

It's not too late to switch but research your hospital and OB because you might be surprised. Mine are both really natural birth friendly, which really shocked me. If your hospital/OB isn't, maybe you could find another one that is.

Some sources, like BOBB, and some of the popular literature out there, situate hospitals as being more adversarial than they necessarily are. Coming from someone who went to film school: I do not recommend relying on documentaries for unbiased information. They are not educational films. Documentarians are taught that films should further agendas and they learn techniques to do just that. They are great for getting you to question things and inspire you to do research, but take them for what they are.

KateLouise

I'm in NZ so I really can't comment on the MW vs hospital birth situation that many women seem to face in the US.

I just wanted to comment on the tearing thing. It was my big fear the first time. It was my big fear the second time. I think it will continue to be my fear until I'm done having children.

DD1: 9 pounds and 2 stitches. DD2 10lbs, no stitches slight graze. 

When in labour the "ring of fire" really did make me feel like I was going to tear from one end to the other. I didn't but I did have to be encouraged to push past that feeling and push LO out with my first.

I didn't realise that fear was so intense until I was in labour.

So I encourage you to talk that fear through with your MW/obgyn. With my second we talked a lot about how if you let your body do it's thing and work with it rather than forcing baby out it allows your body time to stretch etc.

Good luck. 

stahlop

We didn't decide on a home birth until about 28 weeks.  We didn't meet with the MW until 30.  I ended up giving birth at 38.  I had another friend who's OB wanted to induce at 39 weeks (she was 38), she switched to a home birth MW and had the baby at 41.  It is never too late to change.

First of all, talk to your doctor.  You don't know what they will tell you.  Many OB's are okay with natural birth.

And, for what it's worth, my MW delivered and 11 lb baby to a 5'0", 100 lb woman with no problems.   

kegerator

Vegasbb:

I can completely relate to feeling limited on options.

*It is not too late to get a midwife or new doctor. 

*In my town we don't have birthing centers, and midwives only do home births. For various reasons, I would not like a home birth so I'm stuck in a freaking hospital with an OB. Unfortunately hospitals here don't offer water births. 

*I talked to my OB about wanting a natural birth and she advised me to stay home as long as possible when I go into labor to avoid interventions. She was supportive of me laboring while walking around, and not being constantly monitored or hooked up to an IV. 

-----------------------

It's possible to have a fairly natural experience in a hospital with an OB - this is what I'm really hoping for ! It's an uphill battle, but possible! Good luck to you, I understand what you are going through. It sucks having limited options.. 

Do you live in vegas or is that just a random screen name? I live in Vegas and there is one doctor here that will do a water birth that I know of.