Miscarried on Monday

Emmyhaire

I woke up Monday with spotting and cramping. I immediately got into the dr. He sounded hopeful still and sent me to get an ultrasound.  I knew the ultrasound tech was looking for something that wasn't there.  The dr came in and delivered the news, there was no heartbeat and the amniotic sack was too small. 

2:00am I woke upin the worst pain I have ever experienced. I got dizzy and nearly passed out. The contractions lasted for about an hour. The dr did not tell me to expect this. She said it would be like a normal period. A normal period it was not.

 Today I am less emotional, but the emptiness is palpable. I want to start trying again as soon as we can, but my husband is hesitant. I definitely don't want to experience this pain  again, emotionally or physically. But I need to fill this emptiness somehow.

 Any tips are GREATLY appreciated. 

alexnyc39

I'm so sorry, Emmy.  IT is so hard.  I experienced this and spent Easter in the hospital.  I also only heard an early miscarriage was like a heavy period.  Not the horrific hemmorrrighing for hours.  

 My dr. told me I got the 'unhealthy pregnancy' out of the way first and my next pregnancy should be very healthy.  I wasn't sure what to make of that comment at the time.  I guess it gives me hope for next time.

Sorry I can't offer any tips. I do believe your husband will definitely change his mind over the next month.  It's just such a shock and sadness at first - he has to work through it too. I was told it is best to wait 2 cycles, or at least 1 cycle anyway.  In the meantime take plenty of supplements (I mentioned in my other post) and take extra good care of yourself.  I wish you the very best.

Emmyhaire

Thank you Alex. The Dr. Didn't tell me to take any vitamins or anything. I am so frustrated with them! Thank you for your encouragement!

alexnyc39

I was very frustrated with my dr as well for various reasons.  It is so hard to find a good doctor who also has a good bedside manner. My dr. gave me prenatals and a special iron supplement since I lost so much blood.  I also did research and found another doctor to confirm my research was good on what I am going to take the next 2 months now to heal. 

You're more than welcome. Wish I could be of more help but do know I understand the emptiness and how you are feeling.  I usually hate this saying, but I do believe that time is going to be a great healer.

MWoodside

I'm sorry for your loss.

JennyP0222

Hi honey, I am sorry for your loss. I am two months post m/c and I feel like I have weathered the storm. But it does take time. There will be good days and bad days and that is OKAY. I wanted to try again for the reason of filling the emptiness as you mentioned. At the same time, I was petrified of going through the same thing again and intimacy was scary.

My only tip is to let your body heal from this. Your heart and mind will follow. Try again only when your doctor has given you the okay. They usually say to wait at least one cycle, some say to wait longer. I personally was given the thumbs up after one cycle and am now ready to TTC again. I agree with the previous poster mentioning your vitamins. I stopped taking my prenatals in a fit of bitterness but resumed taking them a few weeks later. It really is important if you plan to try again in the very near future. Rest and allow yourself to feel whatever it is you feel emotionally. I wish you the best as you recover!

monkandnut

Hi there- I'm so sorry for your loss. I went through the exact same thing this past Monday as well. Sounds like we had identical doctor's appointments. I agree that the pain was nothing like I thought it would be. Tuesday was the worst for me, Wednesday was bad and the past couple of days have finally gotten better. I don't know how far along you were, but I was 7 weeks. My doctor was fantastic and talked to me for over an hour. She said because I was so early and because my body was miscarrying naturally that I didn't need to wait. That after my period comes, we can start trying again. I know its different for everyone, but that is just what my OBGYN told me. So that is our plan...

I can't tell you enough that I know exactly what you are going through- I couldn't help but be so bitter that on top of how emotionally painful it was- physically it was unbearable as well.

Take care of yourself and I'm crossing my fingers for you!!!

MrsPBandJ

So sorry for your loss.  I miscarried three weeks ago yesterday and it looks like the bleeding is just about to subside for now.  I too was told that the bleeding would be just like a period since it was an early pregnancy, so I was not at all prepared for the pain and very heavy bleeding and clots.  Even if you are early, you can still pass tissue as well.

 You didn't mention having hcg levels checked, but that is one thing I've had to do once or twice a week.  My numbers didn't go down at first, but then I passed the placenta on Monday and they've finally gone down.  I'm going through fertility treatments, and should be able to restart once the hcg is down to zero and it's been a month since the miscarriage.  Hope this helps and things will get better soon.